Category Archives: education

Fundraising (In Sixty-Four Simple Spirit-Led Steps)

How does the Spirit of God move upon his people to give of their resources to build buildings and fund schools and do all manner of interior decorating?

Apparently the answer is “first He draws an org chart.”

Linked here for your perusals are two PDF documents (Pages 1-10) (Pages 11-20) that show how Lancaster Baptist Church (and by extension West Coast Baptist College) does its fundraising. As corporate organization schemes go, it’s a thing of beauty.

It appears that they actually start planning in October for the big giving event in March and involve the entire church with video teams sent out, personal testimonies, targeted preaching, mailings, and endless promotions of the giving drive at other events between October and March.

Then after all those months of planning and work God miraculously sends in money. I mean it may look an awful lot like church members being coaxed, cajoled, and and all but coerced into giving but I’m sure God is involved somehow.

Spiritual Probation

What crime prompted these epistles? What shortcoming was so deserving of the attention of the administraton? The recipient of these letters reports:

“I was a good little freshmen (only 11 demerits), but they found out that I liked CCM because they heard me discussing it with some other students. Even though I didn’t listen to CCM while school was in session, they felt my attitude and views were grounds for spiritual probation.”

Egads. I think probation was lenient given the circumstances.

6 Tips for Surviving Fundy U

1. Break a small rule every day. In a low-trust and high-pressure environment small acts of defiance are mentally healthy. A smidgen of rebellion establishes that you are your own person and not just the puppet of a larger machine. But…

2. When you aim to misbehave tell nobody. And that means nobody. Your roommate, your study buddy or your crush will get a serious case of “conviction” during the next revival and confess all your misdeeds. Unless you would literally trust your life with that person then don’t tell them about your shenanigans. You can however…

3. Keep a journal. You will want documentation later of exactly how crazy this time was because people in the outside world will not believe you. Trust us on this. When you want to write in your journal it’s time to…

4. Find a refuge. Find a place on campus that you can go where nobody else goes so that even when you can’t get out you can still be “away.” I used to climb to the very top of the stairs and stare at the Waffle House sign across the highway just to remind myself that the outside world still existed. Unfortunately I never learned that the real key is to…

5. Be just bad enough. If you look like a “good kid” then the administration will worry about trying to save your soul and manipulate your conscience to make you miserable. If you seem like you’re ambivalent and a bit of an outsider then they’ll worry more about keeping your tuition money and your life will be easier. But that’s only temporary. The real trick is…

6. Get out as soon as you can. The first five techniques can only protect you from so much. The sooner you get out the sooner you can start to heal. We’ll be here for you when you do.