Unfortunately, no matter which side you start with, first is an incorrect answer.
Anyone can conjure up the correct answer. Only one can be “first.” Time was of the essence.
First is never a good answer
WAIT! Are they all girls???
Yes. I should have stipulated that.
I looked for a good 3 minutes before noticing that pants-wearer is a girl. I thought it was a guy in a bolo tie. 😯
I thought he/she/it was Androgynous Pat from SNL. 😯
yeah, I thought the pants-wearer was a dude, too. Totally skewed my process there for a minute.
It has to be a girl because they are sitting WAY closer than 6 inches apart! 😳
I didn’t look closely enough at first so I couldn’t decide: I thought the pants-wearer was a guy since the color scheme and foot wear apparantly fit everyone else’s general style (or lack thereof). However, if blue-pants person is female, she obviously is the visitor.
Gotta love the uniformity – jeans, khakis, or floral prints are always to be found at fundy events.
If this is a hayride you’d think someone would be in culottes. But either skirts or culottes is going to be uncomfortable sitting on hay. The pants wearer is the only one dressed appropriately for a hayride IMO.
The visitor’s mom took the photo…
another fundie-faux-pas is on the left with the open toed footwear 😯
Yeah, I was going to say something about the open toed shoes. Maybe she’s visiting from a more liberal church too?
I was going to go with the 3rd from the left since she is wearing Crocs which could be considered “stylish” aka worldly.
On second thought though I wouldn’t want Crocs and stylish mentioned in the same breath.
That was my initial thought, until I realized that they were all female and the answer was a bit more obvious.
The hover over script was exactly the song that was going through my mind! 🙄
The one on the far left is the visitor. I can tell by mood ring through her eyebrow and the “A for Anarchy” tattoo on the shaved side of her head.
But #5 could be a fundy guy because I see white socks with dark pants.
#1 is a definate hussy for having shoes with open heels.
I would vote #2 Miss Fundystan.
I would give far right my vote. She is, of course, on the far right (placing her in the correct physical position), she is obviously of better moral character than to wear denim for any occasion, and appears to be wearing “nylons.”
Nice usage of the word “hussy”.
Definitely #5, presuming pants wearer is a male of course.
Non floral, non-denim skirt, and non-sneakers.
#2 and #4 definitely know what the fundy woman dress code is for any occasion: tennis shoes with denim jumper or skirt.
Number four is probably showing a little more shin than she should be.
Are you sure it’s a hayride? Could be the finals of the Miss Fundamental Baptist America pageant.
That would be shameful. It would only cause the womenfolk to indulge in senseless pride. Shame!
I’m going with 2nd from the left also. All that bare skin on her arms…temptress!
Maybe somebody leaked a pic from Jack Schaap’s bachelor party.
Excellent! 😈 👿
I thought this was obviously the second from the right, but then I stepped back and looked longer. I have now concluded that none of them are truly fundy. The 2nd one from the left is out due to wearing pants and the rest of them are just playing the fundy game of appearances all while inwardly their hearts are dens of iniquity and lust. How do I know this? Easy, they let someone take a picture of them from the knees down. Such brazenness belies their true heart intentions.
FOURTH from the left. Look how short that skirt is compared to the others. What a whore.
I totally thought the one in pants was a guy. I was going to guess the first one wearing open toes shoes.
Here’s the corollary question: Do you think any of them are smiling?
If they are sweetly submissive, like they should be, then of course, they are smiling (even if the smile is fake).
Women who wear fundy skirts are often flashing their panties when they sit down – this is certainly unfortunate.
Were you there when our former pastor spoke about “panties” from the pulpit?
My 6 year old son at the time, squealed loudly in the middle of the service…”Preacher Schaap said PANTIES!” giggle giggle… 😯 a horrific memory for sure.
I missed that one. I wonder what passage was used to tackle that topic?
Or how about the one where he ranted on about “you girls going around and spreading your legs for every guy that walks by.” Try explaining that to your 5 yr old son!
It’s a lot easier to spread your legs with a skirt— Sadly, most IFB-er girls agree!
They wear their skirts to the bar and to the backseat of some random car, but they’re better than you because you’re wearing pants!
Awe honey, you don’t like the annual Christmas ‘flash’?
Untill I realised the one in pants wasn’t a guy my vote was the one in the short skirt. My wife and I took our youth group to a weekend “Treasure Hunt” at a much larger church. Our assumption was that since some hunting would be involved casuall attire would be appropriate. Our entire group was in jeans. Gasp! The most memorable moment came as my wife, in jeans, was looking through one of thier busses, we were thinking of getting one, and I stood talking with some other YG leaders one guy said that he wasn’t aware of any Bible Churches in our area. I’m so unfundie that it took a minute to realise that I’d just been burned. 🙂
BTW, is the caption of this photo a foo fighters referenced (ie “the pretender”)?
Send in your skeletons, sing as their bones go marching in…
At first I thought the pants one was a guy, until I realized no fundy male would ever DARE get that close to a female type. Let alone two of them at once. So anyhow.
I was like most others. The pants were a male. Then he was waaaay too close to the females. You must have your Bible or a song book between the male & female at ALL times! The crocs, the open toed shoes, the short skirt…I really studied this one. Then it was obvious! The male was a female!
That is really funny. At my former-fundy school the rule was 12 inches (ruler) and a Bible.
Is this a secret test to determine one’s prejudice against women in pants?
Here’s my question, do any of these ladies ever stop in front of a mirror before they go out, smile at themselves, and think, “I look good today”? (Or would that be a sin?)
Of course, if they don’t ever think that, I feel sorry for them — and if they do think that, I feel sorry for their alarming bad taste.
My 16-yo niece went to the Wild’s a few weeks ago. She said that during the separate girls chapel one day that the speaker (a woman, of course) told the girls that if they wear something because they think they “look good” in it, that it is a sin. 🙄 Yeah, my niece doesn’t care. She definitely wears things because she thinks she looks good. She’s pretty used to being called a horrible sinner already, though. 😥 She’s a good kid. 🙂
Please say you’re exaggerating? I honestly would have a problem sending my daughter if she would hear that sort of nonsense. Have they ever read Proverbs 31? Or the story of Esther? If a Christian woman happens to be lovely externally because God made her to be is it wrong to maintain that gift? Of course it CAN be a sin to obsess about how you look. I’d argue being too proud of blase’ modesty is equally sinful. Christian women will have Spirit led modesty develop over time but it’s firstly a heart issue and between believers it’s a grace issue. Their sanctimonious standards will never sanctify those girls, that’s what makes me sad/angry. There is no way that woman could have used a bible verse to support her stance and I’d like to ask her for one. It’s very dangerous to give a “thus saith the LORD” and misquote Him or add a handbook to pick up where they feel He left off. Wow, that really touched a nerve.
Well, I don’t figure we will be sending our kids there. . .however our first child is only 5 weeks old, so we’ll see in a few years how things are going. Feel free to contact the Wilds and ask why their speaker would teach/preach that. I think my niece said it was Julie Herbster.
This niece used to go to Christian school, so she has already heard it all. She is much happier home-schooling. (Her parents don’t want to send her to public school.) However, she still gets sent to the Wilds every year. This year I picked her up from camp and she stayed with us for two weeks. We have interesting discussions about things. My wife and I are very candid with her. Nothing is off-limits in discussion. I still worry about her, since she is still a kid, but I think she will turn out just fine.
I swear the one second from the left is my sister! She dresses exactly like that…all the time. I’ve never understood why denim jumpers? Aren’t there more breathable fabrics to make these from? Why would you want to cover your body in a heavy, hot material? Sure, I wear jeans, but I wouldn’t want them head-to-toe…
My sixth grad teacher said that a woman must suffer for beauty. (That was back in the days of girdles, stocking garters, and pinchy screw on or clip on earrings.) But in fundy land a woman must suffer as atonement for the sin of choosing to be born female. So no. No breathable fabrics, and any fabric that you don’t have to spend time and energy starching and ironing is also suspect.
Sooo difficult. Except for number two and Miss Pants, they are all brazenly displaying their ankles. But number two is showing off her arms. I say they are all Jezebels!
I still say that is a dude. So, there are no visitors and this was a trick question.
It’s all good on the Fundee Hayride!
The only true fundy here is #6. She bears all the signs: “feminine” khaki skirt, “uniform” pantyhose, “dressy” loafers, “demurely” folded hands, and “ladylike” leg positioning. 🙄 The three brazen hypocritical hussies (#2, #3, and #4) are sitting with their legs open like they would normally wear pants if it wasn’t a totally fundy-sponsored event (that’s the kind of fundy I was ). #1 is a casual fundy. #5 is a real (although fashion-impaired) human being.
I was going with #6 as well, she was more dressy than the others, more formal skirt (the others were all denim), loafers instead of sneakers, and possibly nylons. To be fair, she looks nice, but the others look more comfortable for a hayride. 🙄
This lack of fashion pains me. Even the clothes I’m lounging around the house in right this minute are more fashionable and attractive than all that unflattering denim. And I can’t even begin to talk about those shoes. If the idea is to keep men from lusting… I can’t speak for men, but I’d guess this is a slam dunk.
Looks like a bad Fundie Quiverful remake of “My Three, *no* Six Sons, *I mean* Daughters. All that’s missing is a pair of Wingtips. 🙄
“Lust prevention chic”
So glad I can say I never had to wear a skirt on a hayride. My parents had a little common sense, and let us wear pants, much to the chagrin of our pastor, I’m sure. But since the hayrides were usually at our house, our tractor, our hay, he couldn’t complain too much. ❓
And even when I was in the midst of fundyland, I wore a Levi jean skirt, white socks (NO nylons under the socks!) and white tennies.
I’m making notes of crazy stuff coming out of the Wilds. That teacher should be ashamed.
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