FWOTW: DanSouza.org

dansouza

Today’s website pick is a strange meeting of the old and the new. The web design is straight out of 1998…but there’s also a link to Twitter.

I do enjoy how they put the full menu after every individual entry on the doctrinal statements page. The saddest part is that this guy apparently also runs his own website business ministry — which I’m assuming is a resale site of some kind. What could go wrong?

many thanks to Semp for sending this one along

218 thoughts on “FWOTW: DanSouza.org”

    1. He does like the word ‘concerning’, doesn’t he? I guess nobody’s told him that just using the same word over and over again doesn’t really count as alliteration.

    2. It might just be my computer, but on the ‘articles’ page, all the second column of links is directly over that horrible graphic of the verse that is repeated ad nauseum, so you can’t read them.

      1608686 alleged page views at this point in time, I wonder what it’ll look like tomorrow?

    3. Got a security warning on the ‘family’ page, apparently it wants to run an unsigned app?

      Also, did that couple really give all four of their daughters the second name ‘Joy’?

      1. Never fear. Their names are Pumpkin, Cupcake, Princess, and Sunshine 😯

        One of my sisters had the middle name of Joy and my mother used to scream at her: “****** Joy!!! You aren’t much of a joy!!!”

        1. And wow, that’s horrible what your mum said to your sister.

          When I was a little girl, my Daddy called me “Tiara Lee” as a nickname, and princess, and all those other pet names. We had/have major problems at times in our family, but there is love there.

        2. “Their names are Pumpkin, Cupcake, Princess, and Sunshine.”

          They’re the Power Puff Girls’ weaker cousins.

        3. On second count, it’s two words. “Powerpuff” is one word, and “Girls” is a secod word. That’s what I meant, but it’s not what I wrote.

        4. Just as long as none of the daughters are named Serena. (Brownie points to whoever catches the literary reference.)

        1. When I went to the family page that pop up appeared and I had to reboot to get rid of it. Nothing else would work.

    4. Each page of the website looks completely different, to the extent that they look like multiple different websites. Not that any of them are set out well.

      Also, since when is a calculator to tell the day of the week that you were born on a ‘bible help’?

      I was born on a Friday (I’m sure you’re all dying to know, lol)

      1. lol – just realised that the page that has the day calculator on it has the word ‘corresponds’ with three r’s.

        Arrrrrr me hearties. *insert pirate smilie here*

        1. I’m supposedly “fair of face”. I think Thursday would be a better fit for me. I feel defrauded 😡 :mrgreen:

          I don’t get the connection to Bible helps, either. Maybe he thinks this has something to do with numerology??

        2. Well, well, well… It seems I should have been born on a Sunday. :mrgreen:

          I’ll leave y’all guessing as to why that might be…

      2. At first I thought the “Born Which Day” link would connect me to a diatribe against Lady Gaga’s song “Born this Way.”

      3. I was born on Thanksgiving, which made it really easy for me to remember that I had “far to go.” 🙂

      1. I don’t think I can count how many times I’ve installed Front Page extensions to IIS sites! Not in the last decade or so, but back in the day.

  1. I was bored on Saturday night, so I went to my favorite search engine to look up something and this was one of the gems I found. I’m dangerous when I’m bored.

  2. I opened the page only to immediately close it back up. The little email scroll at the bottom was driving me nuts.

  3. I love the FAQ page. There are actually 11 questions already prepared for you. You just select the one you want to ask from the drop-down menu.

    I bet I can guess his answer to the “What Bible do you use” question. But alas, no answer is given.

    1. The title is “Frequently Asked Questions”. There is nothing about answers. The answers page is probably under construction.

    2. His very well hidden answers to the FAQ’s (that’s kind of a really good metaphor for fundamentalism):

      Where is your local church membership?
      My membership is in Lighthouse Baptist Church of Waterbury Connecticut.

      What Bible do you use?
      I only study from, preach from and quote from the King James Bible. The King James Bible is the best and most trustworthy English translaton available. It is an excellent and true translation of the Textus Receptus Greek Text and Masoretic Hebrew Text. God has preserved His Word for every generation through these writings. The KJV (1611) is God’s Word without error or need of correction.

      What size churches do you hold meetings in?
      The size of the church is not a matter for a meeting. No church is too small. Any size church that believes the Bible and can agree to my doctrinal statement can have a meeting. I have had meetings in basements with just a handful of people and in buildings with hundreds.

      What are your financial requirements for a meeting?
      I have none. I live by faith and leave all financial considerations to the church. I do not have a fee or demand travel expenses. These are best left for the church to consider. I put the matter of finances in the hands of the pastor. Most churches give something for traveling expenses and take a free will offering each night. We sell nothing and solicit nothing.

      What about your meals and accommodations?
      Our needs for food and lodging require no special attention. Motel accommodations can be simple and are preferred. But certainly not demanded. I do need time for study, prayer and rest and have found it generally best to be in a motel. If I am alone without my family and will stay in a home, there must be no embarrassing circumstances such a being alone with teenage girls while the parents are at work or alone while the husband is not there. There is too much for the devil to use against evangelists and preachers these days and we must be on guard.

      How does a church book a meeting?
      It works out best to either phone me or use the Schedule/Inquire link below. This form works out well because while I am on the road I can still pick up my E-mail from most any place. Dates can be set and confirmed. All meetings are confirmed by phone. Please fill out all information in the form.

      Do you hold Ecumenical Meetings?
      NO! I am a Fundamental, Independent, Bible Believing, Baptist and practice Biblical Separation both ecclesiastically and personally. I will not water down or weaken the Gospel by compromise.

      What type of meetings do you hold?
      The Lord has used us in Revival Meetings, Eangelistic Meetings, Christian School Revivals, Faith Promise Mission Conferences, Youth Camps, Tent Meetings, Men’s Conferences and Special Events or days a church may have.

      How long are your meetings and what days do you hold them?
      The length of a meeting is best determined by the Pastor. After all he knows the need of his people better than I do. Therefore I have no set structure for the days of a meeting. Some choose a Sunday-Wednesday, Wednesday-Sunday, Friday-Sunday, Sunday to Friday and even Sunday to Sunday. Any other combination the Pastor feels is best for his church can be worked out. Even a one day meeting is fine.

      Do you have a tape ministry?
      I have no tapes or literature for sale. I do not sell or promote anything in my meetings except the preaching of the Word of God and the ministry of the local church. I am there to promote the Gospel, not myself or my ministry. I do not criticize others who may sell and promote their materials in churches. My focus is on the local church hosting the meeting and their ministry and needs.

      How can I order your Gospel Tract?
      You can request tracts using the link on the home page
      </blockquote"

      1. “The KJV (1611) is God’s Word without error or need of correction.”

        This multiple revisions ending with the 1769 revision I’d be willing to bet he uses.
        Ah, the bliss of willful ignorance.

        1. It’s also pretty spectacular to postulate that “God has preserved his word for every generation” through a translation that according to his own statement was done in 1611. I’m not sure if people alive before then didn’t count, or if King James retroactively delivered his 1611 translation to Adam and created a infinite time loop of some sort.

        2. RobM, don’t be getting all logical and stuff. You’ll make fundy heads explode. On second thought ……… you might be on to something.

        3. @RobM

          Didn’t you know that King James was actually a Time Lord? When you consider that, KJV-Onlyism makes perfect sense 😛

      2. I understand the need for prudence, but I was a bit baffled by his comment regarding teenage girls. Am I alone in not only not wanting to cheat on my wife, but also having no attraction whatsoever to teenage girls? It just seemed a bit specific…

        1. Teenage girls are known for throwing themselves at IFB preachers, doncha know? Every MOG is just so sexy the poor girls can’t control themselves.

        2. Nah, you see the mog is just SO HOLY that Satan MUST bring his ministry down because that is the one ministry that makes him terrified. So Satan makes those girls throw themselves at the mog.

        3. Teenage girls throwing themselves at me has never been a problem, despite my fervent wishes back when I was a teenager myself.

        4. I saw that comment as part of the IFB “blame the victim” culture. It sounds to me like he is saying, we KNOW a fundy MOG would never commit statutory rape, but those skanky teen girls sure might ACCUSE him of it. And we can’t have that, now can we?

        5. Not to sound too naive, but her could have been referring to abstaining “from all appearance of evil.”
          It could be that he is concerned with someone accusing him of something he didn’t do, so he wants to avoid being in a situation where it would be his word against an underage girl’s word.

        6. In my more naive days I would’ve assumed that, but I don’t know that’s an assumption I can make any more.

        7. Actually, the man does have a point in not wanting to be alone with wives and young girls. It is possible for false accusations to be made, and also possible for Potiphar’s wife re-enactments to occur. Who wants to risk that?

        8. Come on, folks. On the one hand, we rail (rightfully so) on the Schaaps out there who have helped themselves to sexually mature females to whom they are not married. On the other, we mock a guy who appears to want to set boundaries right up front to stay open and above board in his interactions with sexually mature females. That’s prudent on several different levels. However, we’re busting his chops and somehow turning this into a “blaming the victim” thing? How about giving a guy credit where he deserves it? Being “fundy” doesn’t mean that a person is 100% evil/stupid in every facet of their life, nor does saying that he wants to avoid certain situations mean that he is a closet perv or serial adulterer wanna-be. Let’s be as fair and reasonable as we want these guys to be.

      3. Dear Dan:

        You wrote: ‘there must be no embarrassing circumstances such a being alone with teenage girls while the parents are at work or alone while the husband is not there. There is too much for the devil to use against evangelists and preachers these days and we must be on guard…

        I reply: ‘why should we hire you when you admit to having a problems with teenage girls’?

        Christian Socialist

        1. There’s a guy on my street who has a court order that doesn’t allow him to be alone with teenage girls. So he would have to have an arrangement like this if he went evangelizing.

          Just sayin’.

        2. Obviously he doesn’t have a problem with them, the temptresses have a problem with him and intend on destroying his ministry.

      4. I do have to say that it is very commendable that he doesn’t sell anything at all; no messages, books, or tapes.

      5. Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t the King James Version the one with the unicorns? Aside from all the other problems that bibles have, of course.

        I wonder if this guy could give me a straight answer on whether man or the animals were created first, for instance.

        1. I can’t think of anyone that would argue that humans were created before animals?

          Or are you referring to the order of appearance in Gen 1 vs Gen 2?

        2. What Dr. Fundystan said. There’s a bit of a difference between the two stories of Genesis. I don’t think it’s been resolved in any version of the bible. It’s a bit of a problem with those who claim the bible is the inerrant word of Yahweh.

          I suppose I should avoid going into too much antagonistic detail with this crowd, but the errors and need for correction start right at the beginning of the bible like that.

          Pretty sure the KJV is the one with the unicorns, though. Satyrs too. Of course, they went back later and claimed these were mentions of oxen and goats, but that sounds an awful lot like a correction to me.

        3. I guess the thing I don’t get about unicorns & the order of human vs animal, is that no one actually argues that unicorns existed or that humans were created before animals. I get that you can read Genesis to conclude that, but unless someone does, I don’t see the point in knocking down straw men, when creationist make equally uninformed arguments about how to read Genesis 1 & 2.

        4. I think I see it differently, Psycho Gecko (+1 for the screen name, btw). I don’t see the creation narratives as a scientific accounting of origins at all, but rather a collection of literary devices designed to set the worldview of the reader on the themes of a personal creative God and human relationships. I mean, even for the author(s) of Genesis, the creation and animals don’t mean much to the plot development. I don’t see a need to correct “errors” here any more than I would in William Blake.

        5. You say strawmen, I say Creationists, like those people suing about school standards in Kansas. They may seem ridiculous to you, but they’re the same types who had books in Louisiana claiming the Loch Ness monster’s existence disproves evolution.

          I don’t care about the stories of Genesis any more than necessary to poke holes in the arguments of people who take it literally, but it’s nice to point out what it actually says to people who claim to believe in it as the inerrant word of a deity.

      6. “I put the matter of finances in the hands of the pastor.”

        “The length of a meeting is best determined by the Pastor. After all he knows the need of his people better than I do.”

        Of course the CEO should dictate any and everything that happens in “the church.” After all, it is HIS ministry.

        B.R.O.

  4. Brother Souza is guy I know somewhat well. Back in my fundy days, I used him a lot as an evangelist. The website is odd, but the church I formally worked at used his web services and found it to work very well. He is incredibly reliable himself and was always quick to help if there was some issue with the website or server.

    1. Thanks for posting this. Ok, so it’s not the most modern website in the world, but the Souzas are good folk. I understand the need behind a lot of the SFL posts exposing corruption and child abuse and things like that, but with a few of the posts lately (the Scripture signs website comes to mind — what’s wrong with people sending free Bible verse signs to people??), it seem like we’re just picking on people.

      1. Since you seem to be acquainted with the gentleman in question, I’ll ask again, “What is an altar ministry?”

        Does he make and/or restore “altars” (aka, communion tables) free of charge? Because that is the only thing that would make sense to me.

        1. I’d love an answer to that as well! My current best guess is that his Bible has some language in it that replaces Jesus with an Altar Call, and just thinks it’s a KJV.

      2. Samer, apparently George ate my response to you, because I can’t find it.

        No FWOTW suggestions I’ve made to Darrell were for the purpose of mocking or insulting anyone. My take on the FWOTW feature is that it points out a contradiction that fundies make. Fundies are so worried about outward appearances and good testimonies but when it comes to the written media they use, all that goes out the window. Poor grammar, poor spelling, incoherent thought, bad site design, etc., are all too common features of fundy websites. In fact, fundy websites are generally among the worst I’ve seen. Sometimes I exit fundy sites almost immediately because they assault the senses. The FWOTW feature is also a good way to point out faulty doctrine and teaching and outmoded practices/methods.

        Sometimes we SFL commenters do cross the line and say inappropriate things. That is not personally my intent and I try very hard not to insult or offend anyone.

    1. No, GR. “Sight” is how fundies spell “site.” (That is how King James spelled websight as well.)

  5. I actually read his entire doctrinal statement. I saw, in that quick perusal, 9 grammatical and spelling mistakes and several more bad usages

    1. Also a lack of any Biblical reference as to why he holds any of his particular beliefs.
      Just a lot of “I believe…”

      1. Haha. One of my political philosophy profs at the University of Dallas was OBSESSED with every time the word “credo” (“I believe”) appeared in ancient texts. He was a Straussian and believed that this word somehow elevated the text that followed it to this special, mystical, “especially true” status.

    2. And I still can’t get over how many fundies put the “Scriptures” first in the doctrinal statement – implicitly giving it highest importance.

      Because using the KJV is more important than the fact that Jesus died for our sins. 🙄

      1. I’ve never understood why they don’t put the church first. Since, after all, the church determined what would constitute the Scriptures in the first place. And for fundies, the church is god.

        1. Primacy of Bibliology predates Fundamentalism by a long ways. I think it probably began in the reformation when Catholicism maintained that the church was the means of learning & attaining (prob not the best verb there) salvation and protestants believed that the scriptures were.

          I like that he defines Satan as a “distinct personality”, which I’m thinking of as being quite the jokester. I think he probably was looking for personhood, but IDK why we would use personhood to describe God, or Satan, or the Holy Spirit, although Jesus would be a person. I’ve always thought “literal beings” or “beinghood” which isn’t word but for non-human beings, seems like it should be.

        2. I get that, but it’s telling that they have false teachings in their very first point. It makes you wonder what else they got wrong?

  6. – The poll doesn’t seem to work

    – The “Newsletter” is from early 2009

    The repeating menu on the doctrinal page looks like a style problem, but I didn’t check it out.

  7. What degree is a ThB? And an BRE? I know there used to be an old BBS game called Barren Realms Elite…I dont think thats what they mean. (See family page)

    Also on the family page one of the guys had “plans” to reach the prisons? And that was an accomplishment? In that case, I plan to be a nobel peace prize winner.

    1. “BTh” is “Batchelor of Theology”, so I guess “ThB” must instead stand for “Theologically Basic”. It probably means he attended Bible School for an entire morning. Pity he didn’t stay on after lunch to get is DPh – “Duh, Phudamentalist!”
      Oh, and “BRE” atands for “Barely Relevant Education”, which at least is honest.

        1. Either it was in a box of Cracker Jacks, Frosted Chocolate Sugar Caffeine Bits, or it was free in a package of toilet paper.

      1. I want to address this remark about BRE meaning “barely relevant.” There are those of us out here in ex-fundy land who messed up when we were young. We decided to go to a Bible college instead of a secular school. Why? We were convinced it was right and that the world was out to turn us against God.

        I was one of those. I messed up. I am a born teacher and never wanted to be anything else. Instead my state teacher college, I went to Midwestern and earned the BRE.

        It was a huge mistake, but one I couldn’t afford to undo. There was no money for a second college education, so I’ve made the best of it.

        I am not barely relevant. I am an intelligent, well-read woman who has had to educate myself so that I can teach high school English. I am a published author of children’s stories.

        So, yeah, the degree is worthless. But those of us with it are not. Sorry if I sound offended, but I am. I’ve worked too hard to better myself.

        1. I’ll fly a starship
          Across the universe divide
          And when I reach the other side
          I’ll find a place to rest my weary soul and then
          Perhaps I may become a highway man again
          Or I may simply be a single drop of rain
          But I will remain
          I’ll be back again and again and again and again…

          +10 if you can name the artist (no googling)

        2. I didn’t know the song, and never would’ve guessed the group, but that list of members is the Highwaymen!

  8. One has to wonder if his “KJB” has most of the epistles beginning with the greeting:

    “Paul, called to be an apostle of the Great Altar Call”

    1. The Orthodox liturgy has the Great Entrance.

      The IFB liturgy has the Great Altar Call.

      (Keep moving. Nothing to see here.)

      1. Dear Deacon’s Son:

        That was hilarious, brilliant and hilarious. Who says that IFBs have no liturgical sensitivity! I thought that the Great Altar Call was just being stupid. Now I discover that it is [seriously] the height of their liturgy. Now all I need do is to invent a rationale for replacing the Lord’s Table with the Great Alter Call.

        Christian Socialist

  9. His Paul Harvey page is difficult if not impossible to tell where Paul Harvey’s commentary ends and Souza’s begins. I don’t think he has the paid the copyright fees to completely reproduce that commentary.

    1. That whole articles page is spectacular. Half the links you can’ tread due to not fitting in the background correctly. You’d think when you click there’d be one about Jesus in there, but no, you get Paul Harvey, Ronald Reagan (A Great American), and one about “Brother John Kelley”

    2. His “article” that talks about the guard at the tomb of the unknown soldier is simply an oft-forwarded email, much of which is false, according to Snopes.com.

        1. Most of that section is. If you have an afternoon free you can run it through Snopes, but they’re very familiar. In fact, I think my Aunt Rachel has sent me copies of nearly all of then in email…

  10. Thvs saith the Lord, Stand ye in the wayes and see, and aske for the old paths, where is the good way, and walke therein, and ye shall finde rest for your soules: but they said, We will not walke therein.

    If King James had a web server, I’m sure he would use beveled tables.

  11. According to fundamentaltop500.com (referenced on one of the pages) his site has over 700 page views today as opposed to 38 yesterday.

    (Also so many bonus FWotW there)

    1. I’m sure they are all beside themselves about this, and think that this marks the beginning of a great revival. How great their disappointment will be should they discover where the traffic is coming from.

      1. When they see where all the traffic comes from, they will think this is surely the beginning of The End Times™.

    2. Do they list like Last Monday? We all know that only Satanists (presumably Darrel/semp) are working/browsing on Sundays.

  12. I can’t be the only one wondering, what -specifically- an altar call ministry entails.

    Also, the fact that all the Souza kids attended Fairhaven makes me very concerned for the safety of Evangelist Dan’s grandchildren. 🙁

    1. I thought that was kind of weird too. Sometime I’ll ask a fundy preacher for the chapter and verse that talks specifically of an altar call.

      1. That second one… I don’t think I’ve seen a sign I simultaneously agree with and disagree with more.

        Jesus died for you? Of course he did, and isn’t it wonderful!

        Silence your cellphone out of respect/in church? Sure, that sounds like a good idea!

        But when you try to shove those two ideas together… *shudder*

        Does this count as a Jesus Juke?

      2. Those two ideas only go together if we’re having a funeral for Jesus. “If only you’d silenced your phone and followed all the rules, Jesus wouldn’t have had to die! Shame on you!”

  13. I had a look at the web hosting site, and it does look a lot more professional. However, especially on the terms of use page, there are still a lot of spelling errors that reduce its professionalism. Also, there’s a picture of the Souzas down the bottom with a link to this other page.

    1. Oh, come now. Didn’t you see the FWOTW with the angels falling down the screen? That was way worse than this one.

        1. Yeah, yeah, I had them, too.
          I did love that waxer gizmo. I can close my eyes and smell the wax even now.

        2. Someday (in my dreams), I will write a murder mystery set in an ad agency, where the murder weapon is an X-acto knife.

          That’ll be right after hubby and I co-write a steamy historical novel (just begging to become a mini-series) about Justinian and Theodora, based on Procopius. Good times!

  14. It seems strange that he says that speaking in tongues has no place in the New Testament church. At the same time that he’s saying that the KJV is accurate, and it says that the New Testament church had speaking in tongues.

  15. They seem obsessed with “life verses” (definitely something fundies like!). A fine example of favorite fundy proof texts. Except for DIL Hana, who doesn’t have one. But maybe she and her husband believe that his should stand for both of them.

    Here’s a life verse I recommend for them:

    “Observe thou that which I command thee this day: behold, I drive out before thee the Amorite, and the Canaanite, and the Hittite, and the Perizzite, and the Hivite, and the Jebusite, and the Website.” Ex. 34:11, IFB Amplified Version.

    1. When Shoes used to comment on here, his life verse was a dandy: 1 Chronicles 26:18 “At Parbar westward, four at the causeway, and two at Parbar.”, although banning the website is pretty good too.

  16. “Oh, what a tangled web we trammel,
    When first we practise HTML.”

    (From Sir Walter Scott’s late poem, “Souziad”)

  17. I selected “Read a Bible Verse” and got this:

    Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof: and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit. Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools. Ecclesiastes 7:8-9 (KJV)

    Not exactly a favorite passage of most fundy preachers.

    1. The verse in that chapter that talks about not asking why “back in the day” is better than now reminds me of fundy MOGs (and fundies in general), because they think that the mythical days depicted in “Leave It to Beaver” were so much better than today. In many ways it not only wasn’t better then, but it was worse then. After all, SFL wasn’t here in 1952.

      1. I don’t think we want our Baptist young people pronouncing Bible names like the Catholics. I mean, they don’t even tell you how to pronounce Osee, Isaias, and other difficult Hellenized Hebrew names from the KJV NT.

        (Am I the only one who ever heard the KJV-only sermon that these oddly-transliterated prophets in the NT are NOT the same as the ones in the OT because THEIR NAMES ARE DIFFERENT!!)

  18. Concerning Sanctity Of Life. I believe in the sanctity of life. It begins at the moment of conception and ends when the spirit leaves the body. Any artificial means to terminate life is an abomination to the Lord and is morally wrong. This includes, but is not limited to abortion and euthanasia.

    But I bet it doesn’t include war. 😕

      1. So you say that war is morally right? Perhaps it’s morally less bad than the alternative, but having seen the effects of war first hand, I can’t say that war is a good thing. Even if a declaration of war is in response to an act of war perpetrated on a nation, it is never good.

      2. I lean liberal/libertarian, but not anarchist. I was just pointing out the absurdity of his absolute condemnation of ALL killing, when we know that fundies are always gung ho about the USA going to war, as long as the war is initiated by a Republican President, at least.

    1. Likely does not include Death Penalty, DNR orders, unclear on accident victims, political assassinations (by the US — if typical fundy anyway), or self defense.

      Probably does include suicide as morally wrong but doesn’t really state either way.

      I’m sure I’m missing some others, but I doubt he thought that his broad statement would include all of those, or as mentioned war.

  19. Fundamental (We believe whatever you believe, whaterver will get us more meetings)

    Soul Winning (We believe in decisional regeneration and the magic words in the Sonner’s Prayer)

    Bible Believing (We believe every word in the 1611, inspired, infallable, innerent word of the King James Bible… except where we don’t agree with it then we will interpret what it actually says for you)

    Separated (because it is harder to actually give an answer to questions about theology, soteriology, all thos other -ologies and fellowship then it is to separate and indoctrinate.)

    King James Bible (see #3, also: the fourth member of the Trinity.)

    Non-Compromising (see #4, compromising leads to fellowship with heretics who are not as separated as we are.)

    Independent Baptist ( we answer to no man or organization other than our own camp of like minded Baptists. We are accountable only to god and we strive to become the only god we are accountable to.)

    Local Church (Is the final authority in the religion we practice. All power in things spiritual are to be found in the local church only, because we do not believe in the one catholic church… because you know… it’s Catholic.
    In fact, only those in the local church will be in heaven, all other denominations will miss out. That is why we so soul winning, so others will get to experience heaven with us.)

    1. Jiminy Cricket george! Proofread much?
      I give up! that’s it I quit!

      The fingers have completely divorced themselves from the instructions sent to them from my brain. I am now typing with my nose and my elbows… the results can’t get any worse! 👿 🙄

  20. I think it’s interesting that all of the ‘articles’ in that link are viral emails, stories, half-truths… nothing that looked like an article to me.

    I also had a malware attempt whilst there, so check your security.

  21. The Th.B., or Bachelor of Theology, was an undergraduate theological degree common in the 1950s.

  22. mattsouza.org is a nicely done website. Just saying – maybe he can help dad with a new design.

    1. Looks very nice, actually. A bit of trouble with the English language, but the overall first impression is good.

  23. Darrell said,
    “The web design is straight out of 1998…but there’s also a link to Twitter.”

    Even more puzzling: he’s using java script for his image roll overs, but using CSS for other styling. You can use CSS 3 for roll overs these days, no java script necessary.

    CSS 3 can also be used for animation now. You don’t have to use GIFs, or Flash, for some situations.

    He’s also using Tables for layout, rather than divs or nav/section/article/, etc.

    Not that I personally care, but a lot of professional web designers have a conniption fit if you use Tables for layout, as this guy is doing on his home page.

    On his “family” page (under the family photo), it says,

    “Left Front: JoHannah, Jenna, Bethany, Victoria
    AKA: Pumpkin, Cupcake, Princess & Sunshine”

    How very odd.

    1. Aw, I didn’t hear any crappy piano. Maybe I’m missing a plug in? I use the latest browsers, usually Chrome, sometime Fire Fox.

  24. I am trying to resist the temptation to sign up my local fundy church to have Evangelist Dan come and give them some rousing sermons. 😈

    1. See, I’m on the other end of the spectrum. Should I put the information in for our local Presbyterian church? Or Methodist? Or interdenom?

      Would love to see how he would handle it, either way…

  25. His latest tweet…

    3rd day into the 8 day Revival in Jackson Michigan. God is showing His presents and power. Praying for the Glory to fall and fill.— Dan Souza (@ctpreacher) October 1, 2013

    I like presents, too, btw.

      1. Heck, I’d settle for presents of just chocolate. Has to be the good quality stuff, though. None of that Hershey’s crap. 😕

        1. Lord, I don’t want a doctorate
          I just want a box of chocolate.
          Yeah, and I don’t want a list
          ‘Cause I’d rather have a Hershey’s Kiss.
          And I don’t want to bloviate
          Just want to eat some chocolate.

          Arlo Guthrie’s “Motorcycle Song,” modified.

      2. Big Gary, between your familiarity with border tape, non-repro blue pens, waxers, and now your great poetry skills, I think I love you. But I still haven’t gotten my chocolate yet.

    1. I wonder if he is making that judgement based upon the number of people at the alter last night or the number of hits his website got yesterday?

    1. And to show how pathetic I am, the counter was on 197 when I pulled up SFL, so I left 2 comments to bump it up to 199 so I could then leave the 200th comment…

      It’s a small, contrived victory, but a victory nonetheless…

      1. This is my life, and I had wanted this victory for myself. Now we have to make several dozen more comments for me to claim the 300th post. Sigh. I thought this was going to be a good day. 😥

    2. I’ve been on SFL for a while, and I’ve got to admit that I have no idea how any of you know what number your comment is. How do you know that?

      1. Look at the count just before the comments. Provided no one posts before you do, you know that you are the 181st or 42nd or what have you.

        1. THAT’S how you all do it! I’ve noticed that out of curiosity as to how many comments there were, but never thought of noticing what number I was.

  26. Stumbled across this on the “Kudos to a Fundy” thread:

    [blockquote]This is runofthemill’s wife. I’d have to say hands down, an evangelist by the name of Danny Souza. This guy was so loving, never preached a damning message, but of love and hope and was always smiling and real and poor as a church mouse in winter, but joyful and always so happy to see me whenever we saw each other and always wanted to know how I was doing. I never heard him bash another person, nor was he concerned about fixing me…just loving me. Danny Souza, wherever you are…you were such a blessing to this girl who was growing up in the IFB world as a horribly abused PK. You were a breath of fresh air in the terribly jaded world in which I lived in.[/blockquote]

    http://www.stufffundieslike.com/2011/04/friday-challenge-kudos-to-a-fundy/comment-page-2/#comment-57185

    So there’s that.

        1. Yeah, for some reason I switch the [] for . Makes no sense. Thank you, my fellow PCC grad person.

        2. I leave the closing one off all the time. Howell would have a HEYDAY with my HTML skills and a red ink pen! 🙂

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