Those of us who went to Fundy U have all met the “Company Student” who feels it is their solemn duty to defend and promote the school no matter what. I’d like to pay them tribute with the following bit of painful drivel…
What a privilege it is to go to school at such a fine institution! I count myself blessed to have been admitted at all given the high admissions standards of having a pulse and a credible salvation testimony. I just keep pinching myself to make sure it’s not some kind of fantastic dream!
It’s a privilege to be made to get out of bed at 6:30 each morning and do my required devotions before putting on my carefully regulated clothing and running off to class. What a joy and delight to pay to take required classes from teachers with no degrees on topics that contain no marketable value and no visible scholarship. Then it’s off to chapel where glory is heaped upon glory as we are blessed by preaching from men who knows that it is better to have volume than veracity. My heart overflows.
It’s a privilege to round out my day at my on-campus job where I wash dishes for sub-minimum wage knowing that in the case of accident or injury I will be called upon to sacrifice my own health and well-being for the school by confessing that everything was all my own fault. Oh what a joy when the workday is over and I can spend ten glorious minutes gazing unblinkingly upon my betrothed sweetheart from a distance of six inches away. How sweet to be able to nod goodnight and then go our separate ways back to the dorms before mandatory lights out at eleven o’clock.
If heaven is full, I hope God sends me back to live here. It’s the closest thing to heaven on earth. I would even be happy to keep paying tuition for all eternity!
What a Life! What a School! What a Privilege!