Dating Rules: Crown College Edition
You can view the entire handbook including some really fantastic modesty guidelines for women students here (PDF). On the upside, at least this “college” has the guts to actually post its student handbook online. (I’m looking at you BJU and PCC).
(For more on Crown College you can check out a promotional video we featured last year.)
Posted by Darrell
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Cushla Macree! That has to be the single biggest pile of manure I’ve read in a while. At least they’re honest enough to put it out there so the kids actually have a clue about what they’re getting into. That said, If I’d read that as a high school senior, there is NO FREAKIN’ WAY I’d set foot on that campus.
All I can say is that people who are stupid enough to agree to these rules deserve to be held to them. Yep, that describes fundies to a tee!
One reads this bullshit and thinks “Is this really too much different than Sharia law”? How dare fundies criticize fundamentalist Islam when they spout the same crap? Really sickening.
That’s a little over the top, don’t you think? Nobody here is going to be beaten for meeting someone of the opposite sex without a chaperone. Expelled, maybe, but not beaten. No co-ed with a skirt that’s too short will have their legs whipped and spray painted red. Even if two students here are caught having sex, neither is going to be stoned. Relax, we’re a long ways from Sharia.
Ehh, I think it depends on the parents if the offenders are beaten. Think “Pearl”.
That’s not what sharia is even about. !! It’s simply a moral code for Muslims, and includes … praying. Showering. Giving to charity. Really far-out stuff.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sharia
hiring yourself out as a third person, its a good gig if you can get it.
Oh and my younger sister enrolled in this college this fall for the single purpose of meeting a man. good Lord.
Wouldn’t meeting a man work out better in a place where you could, you know, talk to guys and stuff?
I suppose the odds are slightly better than the compound she lived in and the 10 member church she went to.
No college for me, they force men to wear womanly clothing: trousers!
REAL MEN WEAR KILTS!!
Shalom
Hermann
All I got is wow.
Are you kidding me? Interracial dating must be approved by both parents in writing and verbally?
Do these people realize that segregation is gone? Jim Crow is gone? It’s not 1960 anymore?
That last sentence is heresy to IFBaptists. It will always be 1960 for them.
Don’t you mean 1611?
I just skimmed the rule book. What a bunch of crap. Are you serious? Permission to leave campus? These are what 18 to 22 year old adults? Insane.
Wow talk about a FIRESTORM!!!I All rules begin for a reason some because the people who made them are crazy and others because they were trying to protect the purity of the students. I went to a Bible College in the late 80′s and it was fairly strict but nothing like this.
Two things strike me the most about the policy. I am a dad with two teenagers so I am going to implement the 3rd party policy. Just kidding, kind of. Even the Amish allow their kids who date some time alone even if it is only the wagon ride home after a church event. At some point you have to let your grip go a bit so people can mature and yes there will be mistakes.
However, the interracial dating thing is just crazy. Being a Canadian and living near Toronto one of the most multicultural cities in the world this seems so foreign to me. I understand the history and the baggage that comes with the issue but shouldn’t the church be an example and leader in race relations?
To be consistent if you are going to ask permission of both parents then every dating coupe on campus should have the same requirements. Who wants people of different heights or different states dating? Who knows what this might that lead to? Actually, to make things easier why not just arrange marriages from first semester that way it takes the pressure off?
Looking back 30+ years ago to my first rip to Fundy U,there were a lot of kids who needed the rules. They were like @Apathetic says his social skills were. There were others of us whose parents had given them a bit of rope and hadn’t yet hung themselves (ourselves?), so the rules were a bit constricting. Maybe I should have tried following more of them, but since I’m in the 29th year of actually enjoying, not enduring my marriage to the girl I met there, it worked for me.
My second trip to a different Fundy U, I was married and lived off campus so the rules didn’t apply. Except the silly rule about physical contact on campus, in case a visitor saw us. “They might not know we were married and get the wrong idea.” (I plead the 5th as to whether I ever broke that rule, by the way.)
My thought has always been in any ministry I had a part in, that most of the kids in my classes needed a good example, and that seeing me hold my wife’s hand, treat her respectfully, and show that I truly liked her was better than having them wonder if any church leaders had good relationships or just talked about them.
Just read the dress code section … I can’t wear my tragus ring. Fine. But how in the holy heck would they know whether or not any other body part was pierced unless they were looking, and what right do they have to examine my body in search of tats or piercings? That’s grotesquely intrusive. If my tats and piercings are where they can’t be seen, then they are no one’s business but mine. Seems like it shouldn’t be a problem for the school.
What a pile of manure. It would be easier if they put in the book what you can do!
Crown College’s Book of What You May Do
1. Females may attend classes or church as long as they wear burqas and keep their eyes cast down at all times. They may speak when spoken to.
2. Males may attend classes or church as long as they avoid looking at females (those bulky-looking things covered head to toe in cloth). If they are married, they may touch their wives once a month if they bathe well afterwards. If they are single, they may speak to a female if they have permission from staff.
3. Males and females both may do other activities as determined by staff, but they may not ask permission to do these activities. They must wait for staff to determine what is or is not acceptable.
Another thing that jumped out at me: According to the rules, if you somehow make a friend who has a house off campus and you are invited to bring your plus-one to a party at that house, you must also bring along a chaperone who has been approved by the college.
Can you imagine trying to explain who that third person is and why they are in your friend’s living room? Can you imagine being that third person? Has this ever actually happened, or is it just doublespeak for “You may not form connections of friendship with local people?”
Trust me. This is NOT doublespeak and yes it DOES happen.
It’s extremely awkward.
Just think of the “good testimony” you will be as you bring along your uninvited guest that nobody else knows to the party…a guest that you probably don’t even really know yourself.
I would just start calling them my paid bodyguard. As bizarre as that sounds, it is far less weird than calling them my chaperone or a party crasher that follows me around. Let them deal with the questions about their career choice.
Aside from the interracial dating rule (which is hands down the most outrageous and offensive thing in this list), these people are practically begging for their students to be both emotionally and sexually dysfunctional.
I place blame in three areas for the troubles my husband and I have had in our marriage – one third to Fundy U for such dating rules as we could never get to know each other in a real life situation, one third to our fundy pastor’s premarital counselling which covered nothing relevant to marriage (finances and in-laws would have been a huge help), and one third to our ignorance in being so young and getting married and not recognizing the prior two.
So, let me get this right. They define dating as “being with or talking to a member of the opposite sex other than a brief, casual encounter.”
So, then, by their definition, this includes even your mom?
What a bunch a sick Bast$%^ds
That brings up an interesting point. I knew a few brother/sister combos at college. They had to only talk to each other in the approved dating areas. That IS creepy when you think about it.
Seriously creepy. Same with silly rules barring married couples from public displays of affection: wouldn’t it benefit kids to see loving married couples?
It takes a warped mind to consider such things shameful.
“Interracial dating must be approved in writing and verbally by the parents of both students” keeps flashing in front of my eyes, over and over, like an alarm clock’s numbers. I . . . I . . . wow.
Holy crap Jesus must be crying over these people.
Amen to that. Now we know why Jesus wept.
At least he probably laughs away the tears by reading this blog.
A lot of the dress code stuff reminded me of my all-girls Catholic high school… but it seemed less vile when applied to minors instead of GROWN UPS. Also, some of it was just out there. “Ladies” can’t even HAVE pants on campus, let alone WEAR them, EVER? You have to wear culottes to exercise? (Are you ALLOWED to exercise?)
I went to the school’s web site and looked at their photo galleries because, I’m not going to lie, the fundies fascinate me. The photos of the volleyball team show that the ladies wear shorts for their competitions.
I feel defrauded.
I did not grow up fundy. I actually met my ex in college. We went to a state u together. It was very heartbreaking watching his transformation to full fundy. During his transformation, when we would make out he would make us pray quickly afterwards. He would pray things like “forgive her for being a temptress”. It was real hurtful and made me feel awful and like a harlot. Obviously, the relationship did not work out as I was too “worldly” for him and I did not meet the “helpmeet” checklist. When we broke up, he was so deep into crazy that he truly believed Satan brought us together. He ended up with a christian educated girl. I hope she was not too upset when I told her she’s not the first girl he has kissed.
Heaven help any girl he married, fundy or not. This kind of thing burns my butt. The nerve. He blamed you for being a temptress, but not himself, it’s always the woman’s fault. That’s the reason for all the preaching on modesty… always directed to women. If a man is tempted, it’s our fault never his. Such bull puckey. When will men take responsibility for their own temptations instead of always blaming us?
Seems like it would be kind of a mood-killer to have to get on your knees and pray for forgiveness after making out.
When instead, he should have gotten on his knees to give thanks.
Well on the plus side, I think the prohibition against dating 14 year olds is pretty good rule.
Yeah, but the 16 year old high school juniors are still fair game for the 21/22+ year old college seniors.
Would it be wrong to share the entire handbook with my 15yo daughter, so she will
Ooops, hit enter, duh.
…so she will realize the moat around our home is NOT excessive?