Strange Analogies

I cannot possibly refute this logic simply because there is nothing there to refute.

The URL on the picture leads to a church that at the same times claims to be the “friendliest church town but also has this warning at the bottom of their website:

“The public is welcome to attend our services so long as they do not attemp to disrupt them through their words or actions, including non-church solicitation, moral, political, or social protest. Such conduct will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.”

But we’ll prosecute you all friendly-like.

206 thoughts on “Strange Analogies”

  1. Dear Pastor Frank:

    ‘It isn’t what goes into a man that makes him corrupt/unwise …’

    Christian Socialist

    1. I don’t believe he’s saying that alcohol makes the person unwise.

      I think he’s saying that using alcohol is evidence that person is unwise.

  2. This is actually kind of a fun, do-it-yourself surrealism game.
    You just combine any two activities with as little relation to each other as possible.

    If you wouldn’t stack eggs in front of a steamroller, then why do needlepoint?
    You’re smart enough not to eat barbed wire, so why would you put butter on a bialy?
    You wouldn’t feed truncheons to your canary, so why would you wear galoshes?
    If you wouldn’t go up in a hot-air balloon with five dozen bowling balls, then why would you play fantasy baseball?

    1. That one, the balloon and bowling balls, might be worth a try; the real fun would be dropping them on things. 😀

    2. Dear Big Gary:

      Hot-air balloons, bowling balls and baseballs are all round and seem insufficiently diverse. I suggest something along this line.

      You wouldn’t cook hot-air balloons, bowling balls and baseballs in a stew; so why would you poke a stick at mating racoons?

      Christian Socialist

  3. Dear Stuff Fundies Like Reader:

    Imagine Pastor Frank doing a funeral service for a fallen soldier when the Westboro Baptist folk arrived to tell them how much God loves to hate, hates to love and to protest and otherwise disrupt Frank’s service.

    Church nutters compete in a stupidity contest, whatever is a judge to do?

    Christian Socialist

  4. He causeth the grass to grow for the cattle, and herb for the service of man: that he may bring forth food out of the earth;
    And wine that maketh glad the heart of man, and oil to make his face to shine, and bread which strengtheneth man’s heart.

    Ps. 104:14-15 KJV

  5. Drink no longer water but take a little wine for thy stomach’s sake and thy oft afflictions.

  6. So the question I have is, why is Ronald Reagan putting sand in the gas tank? I had a much higher opinion of him before seeing this!

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