188 thoughts on “GOH: He Touched Me”

  4. I’ve mentioned before…we used to entertain ourselves during boring services by paging through the hymnal and adding “in the bathtub” to the end of song titles. It’s ones like this that got us in trouble. šŸ˜ˆ

  5. Sorry, I do not find this sort of humor funny in the least and cannot imagine it would please the Lord; especially when linked to specific accounts in Scripture (John 5:1-15; Luke 17:12-19).

    Luke 8:43-48: And a woman having an issue of blood twelve years, which had spent all her living upon physicians, neither could be healed of any,came behind him, and touched the border of his garment: and immediately her issue of blood stanched. And Jesus said, Who touched me? When all denied, Peter and they that were with him said, Master, the multitude throng thee and press thee, and sayest thou, Who touched me? And Jesus said, Somebody hath touched me: for I perceive that virtue is gone out of me. And when the woman saw that she was not hid, she came trembling, and falling down before him, she declared unto him before all the people for what cause she had touched him, and how she was healed immediately. And he said unto her, Daughter, be of good comfort: thy faith hath made thee whole; go in peace.

    1. I personally am not a fan of putting innuendo into hymns. I find it rather juvenile, which I often find juvenile humor quite amusing, but for some reason not this kind.

      I think you way overstated the case against though. Overblown rhetoric. Also throwing scripture at a perceived problem is not really a strong retort.

        1. Probably, but I try not to speak for God.

          I’m just commenting on our friends’ imagination, or lack thereof.

        2. I’ve never really understood that phrase, BG. God cares for the sparrows and flowers. He loves us unimaginably much – how could he not care for the details? Saying God has “bigger” things to worry about puts limits on his power and greatness, IMO.

        3. I just mean I don’t think God’s going to be offended if you make a joke about a hymn. God is also the God of laughter.

          But if you disagree, I’m OK with that.

        4. I don’t give a flying rat’s ass about what fundies think, say or sing. Their level of wretchedness is incomprehensible.

          However, if you spent just one afternoon with me, looking into the eyes of an abuse victim… you would NEVER joke about this. Not even one little sophomoric snicker. If you have not witnessed it, you simply have no idea of what you are joking about. The degree of which certain fundie leaders have absolutely destroyed lives would wipe even the slightest smile off your face.

        5. Mark, I promise you, the snark here is directed at fundies, and much of the anger is aimed in particular at those who abuse. Calling out the hypocrisy and absurdity in fundamentalism is one way of dealing with frustration with the church and our own past participation in it.

          Many of us here have experienced abuse at the hands of fundamentalists. I agree with you that the comments may come across as insensitive at times, but I don’t believe the folks here are deliberately hurtful. Some of them, thank goodness, have no direct experience with abuse and don’t understand how their comments may be perceived. My advice: if something here triggers you, take a deep breath and know that you can close the page and come back another day if you want. The snark level here is not likely to change.

    3. Reason #654987 why I could never be a fundamentalist: My sense of humor is much too wicked and inappropriate. :mrgreen:

    4. Thank you LTJ, I couldn’t have said it better myself.

      I thought it was pretty low when they were making fun of a couple of blind ladies singing a special a few weeks ago! But it seems that their appetite for this type of “fun” is insatiable!

      It appears that SFL has hit bottom and is now digging!

    5. I think Darrell’s whole point of posting this link was to demonstrate the silliness of seeing innuendo in every little thing. Some of us on this thread then went on to prove that it is very easy to be very silly (and sometimes crass) in the pursuit of innuendo.

      I remember when I first met up with Fundies of the Southern persuasion. I was from Minnesota, where everyone went swimming together at the lake, even on youth outings, even while David Sorenson of “Touch Not the Unclean Thing,” um, “fame,” was our pastor. Guys and girls. Swimming. In swimsuits. Together. Contrary to all expectation, nobody got pregnant from this behavior. Not even the girls!

      Then I went down south to Bill Rice Ranch and BJU. There, I learned that our perfectly common Minnesota behavior was EEE-ville. Normal stuff suddenly was full of innuendo, and would lead to all manner of immorality. We were stunned. However, having been taught to think critically rather than accept anything and everything, we quickly determined that it was these Indy Fundy people who had the perverted minds…not us. We young people were supposed to be the ones driven to sin and debauchery by our hormones, but we never DREAMED of some of the innuendo that these “spiritual” people were introducing to us. These people who saw evil in the music of Steve Green and Sandi Patti, who were horrified when the slit in a girl’s skirt came above her knee in the middle of a stride, who thought themselves to be so ever-loving HOLY as a result of their positions on these matters, are now getting tweaked with innuendo, and their defenders are not amused.

      So, now, we find ourselves in the role of the small child who notices that the emperor is striding down the street in the altogether. We find this to be absurdly funny, or funnily absurd. We point it out, in rather blunt terms. Innuendo be hanged! Dude is nekkid! Can’t anyone else see this?! Oh well. I just hope that maybe, someday, those who have been bamboozled by these hucksters, these phony religionists, will wake up and notice that WE aren’t the ones with the greater problem. It is the self-proclaimed emperor, walking brazenly down the street and putting himself at real risk of major-league sunburn, who should be the focus of their censure. He is the one who claims to speak for Almighty God even while he acts the fool; not us.

      This “innuendo” thing cuts both ways.

      2. I, too, went to BJU from sensible Midwest fundy-lite GARBC in Norwest Indiana (no association with Hammond). Swam in public pools and at Bible camp all growing up without any idea I was committing a major transgression.

        I aked for, and was denied, a copy of the rulebook before arriving for classes.

        Once on campus I came across for the first time both the term “mixed swimming” and its strict proscription.

        I honestly assumed it was a competition rule outlawing changing swimming strokes at inappropriate times and wondered why that was such a Big Hairy Deal that it merited a place in The BJU Handbook.

        Actually, in retrospect, that was probably the beginning of the end for me, Day One on campus. Thanks, Absurd Rule Imposed As If It Were Universally Obviously Biblical!

        1. Northeast GARBC for me. Didn’t realize “mixed swimming” was such a no-no either until I went to BJU. I thought this rule made people MORE aware of sexuality than less: “Ooooo, I can’t swim with you. You’re a BOY.”

        2. I thought that “mixed bathing” referred to guys and girls taking a bath together, and wondered what kind of kooks would feel the need to make a rule against it.

          I soon learned what kind of kooks.

      3. Contrary to all expectation, nobody got pregnant from this behavior. Not even the girls!
        –which leaves me with the image of one of the boys getting pregnant; now that would have been interesting. šŸ˜›

  6. funny how in the account above, the woman touched Jesus, not the other way around . . . so much for defending Gaither lyrics as if they were inspired of God.

    1. Not just this account…Jesus doesn’t touch anyone in the other two passages our friend references. He simply talks to them.

  7. I’ve always though this song was nice, and it’s nice to see it performed well.

    I think I just doubled niced it, looking for descriptions that I like, but am not crazy about that song.

  8. My IFB church didn’t allow this song because it was written by a charismatic (Bill Gaither) They also didn’t allow “How Great Thou Art” because of its Billy Graham connection.

      2. Dear Persnickety Polecat:

        My sin ………… Oh, the Bliss of This Glorious Thought

        I confess to believing that this line could be improved.

        Christian Socialist

        1. Looking at the one line all by its lonesome, then, yeah – it’s odd. However, it’s part of a larger statement. It’s a parenthetical used to emphasize the author’s relief? joy? happiness? that all of his sin is covered by Christ’s atonement. It’s like saying, “And then, the dog – this is the best part – the dog swam across the river and saved the baby from the dingo!”

        2. Christian Socialist, “My sin, oh the bliss of this glorious thought, my sin not in part, but the whole Is nailed to the cross and I bear it no more” is the complete, if somewhat awkward, sentence. If you put it all together it makes perfect sense, but divorcing the first part from the rest of the sentence does sound odd.

          Though I no longer believe most of the tenets of Christianity, I still like that song. I remember singing it in HAC chapel and it was an amazing experience.

        3. CS, I too used to think “what is that supposed to mean”. I think it’s a poorly constructed sentence that can leave one to read with the incorrect assumption of what the “glorious thought” is, but it is a glorious thought that my sin was nailed to a cross for me.

        4. You can make LOTS of song lyrics sound a bit strange if you never resolve the thought. One of my favorites was the song title, “Take My Life and Let It Be.”

          I mean, make up your mind already!

          Newer books fix this by titling the song, “Take My Life and Let It Be Consecrated.”

          Which could be problematic if you use too large a font, thereby forcing your song title to go on to a second row.

        5. That’s my favorite verse of the song, because that line fills my soul every time I sing it. My sin, oh the bliss of this glorious thought, my sin not in part but the whole is nailed to a cross and I bear it no more. Praise the Lord, praise the Lord oh my soul!

        6. we sang this all the time in my church . . the songleader would always say before that stanza, “My sin O the bliss! Sing it!”
          It was especially hard to keep a straight face when we sang it exaggeratedly slow šŸ˜€

    3. I wonder how many IFBs are aware that “Faith of Our Fathers,” one of the old faves, was written by Frederick Faber in honor of England’s Catholic martyrs; or that Ethel Waters, who made “His Eye is On the Sparrow” famous, was a lesbian; or that “The Church in the Wildwood” (which really isn’t even a hymn) is about an actual church in Nashua, Iowa, that is — heaven forfend!!! – CONGREGATIONAL!

      1. I get so sad reading hymn histories. My fundy relatives adore hymns and enjoy reading the stories behind them, but they somehow miss the part that I notice: that those encouraging words were written by Christians from MANY denominations. They want to SEPARATE themselves so thoroughly, and scorn us for not doing so, and yet they love hymns which were written by the very people from whom they separate in every other context. It makes my head and my heart hurt.

        1. I have two books on the stories behind hymns. I think it should be required reading for anyone who wishes to claim the title of “pastor.” Some of those stories are quite eye-opening to an ultra-sheltered Indy Fundy. Our religious heritage is quite a bit more varied/colorful/textured than many would care to admit.

          It’s like doing genealogy research on a hoity-toity relative who thinks her family is just the absolute bestest. You scratch that veneer, and you find all sorts of miscreants not very far back on the family tree. Wonderful fun! And not just because it gives you the ability to pop her little balloon. Fun because it shows God’s redemptive power. (And because it’s cooler to descend from Jesse James than to descend from a Sunday School teacher.)

      1. Haven’t you heard? He’s an ecumenical compromiser because he associates with all Christians, regardless of denominational affiliation. (I wish I were joking.)

        1. Not only that, but he held interracial revivals long before most Fundies thought that was OK.

        2. A little Broadway for the occasion:

          “I Believe; that Satan has a hold of you
          I Believe; that the Lord, God, has sent me here
          And I Believe; that in 1978 God changed his mind about black people!”

          I think it may have been around the same year for both camps, LDS and IFB.

        4. For you purists in the room:

          Truth is the LDS were actually first, the IFB came around sometime between the big loss in US v. BJU (1983) in the Supreme Court, and Bob Jones,__ lying through his teeth on Larry King Live in 2000.

        5. @Andy: LDS did change…much of IFB hasn’t yet. Different cults make changes at different speeds, and when you are as little known and irrelevant to society as the IFB, there is little motivation or perceived need to change.

        6. My regional disadvantage is on display; I ‘think’ the area around me has changed, can’t speak for the rest of the country.

          My best guess would be sometime in the late nineties, prior to the BJIII surrender to the 2000 Bush campaign.

        7. Andy,

          And before “God changed his mind about black people” in 1978 for the Mormons, they had capitulated on polygamy to gain statehood for Utah.

          Wikipedia
          “In the 1890 Manifesto, the LDS Church banned polygamy. When Utah applied for statehood again, it was accepted. One of the conditions for granting Utah statehood was that a ban on polygamy be written into the state constitution. This was a condition required of other western states that were admitted into the Union later. Statehood was officially granted on January 4, 1896.”

      2. Graham used to be fundy and studied at Bob Jones (I think) then became “Southern” Baptist, then became an evangelist that associates with all denominations (including Rick Warren, Mark Driscol, and Craig Groeschel) even promoting the “Emergent” movement.

        In the 80’s, Hyles was the biggest critic of Graham because Graham’s crusades were airing on TBN and Graham was appearing regularly on TBN alongside Paul Crouch who IFB’s abhor.

        In the 90’s Graham added CCM artists to his crusades including Styper, Carman, 4Him, DC Talk, and Hyles and co. said that “Graham and that so called ‘Christian’ rock came from straight from hell.”.

        Today, Graham’s son is now in associated with TBN and the PTL Club and IFB’s (including my former M.O.G. Jim Vineyard) absolute abolish the Graham family as well as TBN and anyone who is non fundy.

        1. Apparently, Graham spent just one semester at Bob Jones College of Cleveland, Tennessee (as it then was). According to Wikipedia, “he found it too legalistic …”
          He then transferred to the Florida Bible Institute (now Trinity College of Florida), and then to Wheaton College (of Wheaton, Illinois), from which he graduated with a BA in anthropology in 1943.

          If you look at his career as a whole, it’s not hard to see why many Fundies object to Billy Graham. For example, in 1963, he posted bail for Martin Luther King, Jr., saying “there is no scriptural basis for segregation.” And “He refused to join Jerry Falwell’s Moral Majority in 1979, saying: ‘I’m for morality, but morality goes beyond sex to human freedom and social justice …'”

          http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Graham
          http://www.wheaton.edu/

        2. John Rice and Billy Graham were friends, and even after Billy Graham went “liberal”, John Rice continued to support him. John R Rice took some heat from other fundamentalists of his day and eventually called Billy Graham compromised. I believe that Jack Hyles learned at the feet of John R Rice.

      3. I kind of have an issue with Graham’s 123 repeat after me prayer approach to salvation. And the fact that he PAID volunteers to hike down the aisles at his revivals to make it look like lots of people were coming forward, so that way people wouldn’t have to stand out and be noticed if they decided to come down the aisle.

        1. I agree with you. I have lots of points of disagreement with Graham’s style of evengelism. But let’s give him his due.

        3. I can definitely appreciate where he came out from, if not where he ended up.

    6. Interesting…to my knowledge, Bill Gaither identifies as Nazarene. AFAIK, the Nazarene church isn’t considered charismatic.

      1. My dad’s family was Nazarene, so I have a little first-hand experience with that denomination. I believe–and others with more knowledge can certainly correct me–that there are several “flavors” of Nazarene, kind of like the different Lutheran, Baptist, and Presby bodies. Some Nazarene churches are definitely cozy with the charismatics; IIRC a significant schism happened in the last century over speaking in tongues.

        However, I don’t know to which Nazarene sect Gaither belongs. I wouldn’t be surprised if he is charismatic-leaning, since our church began using a lot of his music when we evolved from IFB to SGM-ish.

      2. I always though that Gaither was Methodist. Mark Lowery used to IFB until he finished High School, became rebellious and joined the Gaither Homecoming Band. Lowery for a while had his own show on the PTL Club network before Bakker got in trouble. After TBN purchased the assets, Lowery’s show continued to air on TBN until the early 90’s when he made his first solo record as well as Stand Up Comedy Videos and parodies of CCM music videos. He’s been a member of the Gaither Homecoming Band for over 30 years and he was also asked to be the lead singer of Toto in the mid 80’s but turned it down. True story.

        1. Okay, this made me curious, because I think my church would have been horrified to learn they were using music written by an ebil librul Methodist šŸ˜† So I did a quick search, and found that Gaither (and his wife) graduated from a Church of God college, and found a couple of articles that claim he is now Nazarene: http://averyfineline.com/2008/04/16/denomination-and-style/ and http://christianity.about.com/od/Nazarene-Church/a/Church-Of-The-Nazarene.htm (but of course you can’t believe everything you read on teh interwebz).

          And Today I Learned: The Nazarene Church is considered a Wesleyan denomination. Full circle back to the Methodists!

        4. The Nazarene church is one of several that split off from the Methodist movement over doctrinal and governance issues.

    7. OK, please don;t throw bricks and stuff at me, but…I must confess that I have never liked How Great Thou Art. It contains too much “I, I, I” for my tastes…”When I this, when I that”…the “Thou” part is almost an afterthought. Also, it is really hard to sing. You have to pretty much be Leontyne Price to hit those high notes: “Then sings my sooooooul!” And the tune is kind of sappy.

      You may commence throwing bricks now. [ducking out]

      1. I think this showed up in the wrong place. It was a response to a sub-thread up above. Oh well….

      2. I’m always puzzled by “too high” comments, until I remember not everyone else is a lyric soprano. šŸ˜† Our worship leader tends to pitch congregational songs too low for me, so I’m the weird one singing an octave up from everyone else. šŸ˜³

  9. Hmmmmm, I believe we are in a Gray area with this one. 50 shades of Bob Gray that is. šŸ˜Æ

    I’m not making fun of the song, I happen to like it. But it is an unfortunate title given the history of the failures regarding predators in the Unaccountable Americanized Churchanity way “church” is done.

  10. Other unfortunate song titles:
    “Let Him Have His Way With Thee”
    “It is No Secret”

    1. You know it really is a shame that as a society and a culture we are so sexualized that what was once innocent wording now carries much more sinister connotations.

      I guess what is worse is that as Christians we are just as likely to make the connections as the rest of the world. It has gotten to the point that even Bob Jones is changing their Logo away from the BJ to a new heraldic type shield.

      1. This song gave me chills even as a young child, and I don’t ever want to hear it again.

      2. Dear Don:

        Any indications whether Snob Clones will give the KJV the respectful but necessary burial that awaits it?

        Christian Socialist

  11. This is pretty good example of what I call the Barber Shop Quartet style of hymn singing.

    In true IFB fashion, they carry their Bibles to the pulpit, and then don’t open them.
    A Bible is mainly a prop at an IFB church service.

  12. I TOTALLY thumbed thru the hymnal as a tween/teen with my friends and laughed at the titles of the songs … It was almost as dirty as a Jack Schaap sermon when he was in heat.

    1. Be honest, now…isn’t Jack Schaap always in heat? šŸ˜ˆ

      (As a sad aside, my Autocorrect has learned the spelling of Schaap. šŸ˜ )

      1. True. I was fortunate to be around during his early tenure (2001-2004ish) … He was much tamer when he took over from Hyles initially. I think once he had the new auditorium built and tons of minions under his spell, he polished his shaft more often, so to speak.

  13. I hate this song as it’s another one that was over done. My husband and I love southern gospel music but this song is one of their favourites and was sung at most every concert no matter who the group was. I am so tired of it. šŸ™„

  14. Isn’t it funny how a song can instantly take you back to the past? And somehow I never have good memories associated with the GOHs Darrell posts here.

    Also, SFL: awkward and oddly-timed key changes.

  15. I like the song itself & the message therein. The title gave me heebie-jeebies once I hit puberty & understood the darker implications. To be honest, I’m not sure “God Touched Me” would work any better.

    1. I never really thought about the darker implications until Darrell posted this.

      As others have written, it is a shame that we tend to fly to sexual innuendos in almost everything. I’m not sure that there is any solution – how does one regain an innocence once it it lost?

      1. But was it truly innocence or merely ignorance?

        Not knowing is different from having knowledge & then consistently assuming the worst.

        1. Thank you for the clarification. It’s ignorance and not innocence. Sex does not equal guilt nor does knowledge of sex equal guilt. And in the same way, lack of knowledge about sex or personal experience of sex does not equal innocence. It merely equals ignorance.

        2. @Kreine: Until today’s posting, I never associated the title of this song with perversion. That is innocence, not ignorance. The destruction of innocence is a shame.

        3. I don’t think that would fit the definition of innocent/innocence. Technically one of the definitions of innocence apparently is ignorant, and would be the only definition that fits this usage of it. I think you might’ve been looking for naive, which often is thought of as a pejorative, but really isn’t and would be much more fitting for what I think you are trying to convey.

  16. I love gospel quartet singing and this was quite well done. Not as dirge-like as the way my church performed it, so yay!

    Our trick with the hymnals was to put two titles together….like “He Touched Me” “In the Garden”…. etc.

    1. soooo “He Touched Me” “In The Garden” “Just as I Am” and “I Surrendered All” ? (I had to change the Surrender tense, darn).

      1. Dear FormerHACer:

        Can you do anything with that line from ‘Fill Thou My Life, O Lord my God/in every part with praise?’

        /…in intercourse at hearth and board
        with our belovĆØd ones.’

        Christian Socialist

    1. I’d never heard that before. To be fair, Babs isn’t really on the IFB recommended listening list. There’s so much catching up I still have to do!

    2. Apparently, that song is from “the Broadway musical ‘Drat! the cat!'”

      Somehow I missed that show …

      1. My husband actually tracked down a recording of that play. He likes obscure stuff. šŸ™„ :mrgreen:

  18. Dear SFL Reader:

    Sticky sentimentalism, theologically anemic, bereft of artistic imagination. I’ve always admitted to being a music snob, but guys — you can keep your load of guilt and shame, boys. I’m not interested.

    Instead, give me …

    Praise my Soul, The King of Heaven,
    To his feet thy tribute bring.
    Ransomed, healed, restored, forgiven,
    you like me his praise should sing!
    Alleluia! Alleluia!
    Praise with us the God of Grace!

    Praise him for his grace and favor
    To our fathers in distress …
    etc.

    Christian Socialist

    2. Can you give a little more info on that song? Sadly, I do not recognize it but what you shared with us I like .

        1. My absolute favorite hymn. Very little of the Baptist-type gospel stuff — old or new — speaks to my soul at all. There a few, a VERY few, exceptions.

          I might add: I’m a Baptist.

        3. I have to say that The Gaither Homecoming Band without Mark Lowery is like Van Halen without Eddie Van Halen. Plus Lowery gives a little charisma to the Gaither Band.

        4. Dear MSK:

          Majestic? Yes. Majestic!

          And Weary Pilgrim:

          I can certainly understand why ‘Praise My Soul’ would be your favorite. But my problem is that there are so many glorious hymns that it is difficult for me to HAVE one favorite. High on my list would be ‘O Love, How Deep, How Broad, How High,’ some verses of which are here. You really should follow the tinyurl link to hear this wonderful hymn!

          O Love, How Deep, How Broad, How High,
          beyond all thought and fantasy,
          that God, the Son of God, should take
          our mortal form for mortals’ sake!

          For us baptized, for us he bore
          his holy fast and hungered sore;
          for us temptation sharp he knew,
          for us the tempter overthrew.

          For us to evil power betrayed,
          scourged, mocked, in purple robe arrayed,
          he bore the shameful cross and death;
          for us gave up his dying breath.

          For us he rose from death again;
          for us he went on high to reign;
          for us he sent his Spirit here
          to guide, to strengthen and to cheer.

          Granting that the choir and instrumentation are not spectacular [although they are nice], you might both enjoy this ā€¦

          http://tinyurl.com/kpxrfmr

          Granting the difficulty of electing a ā€˜favoriteā€™ hymn, Iā€™d be hard pressed to improve on ā€˜Let All Mortal Flesh Keep Silent.ā€™

          http://tinyurl.com/ke7ezm9

          Christian Socialist

        5. This one is making a big impression on me every time I hear it.

          It is a rare one-verse song that doesn’t send me ’round the bend by the third repitition. What wonderful thoughts expressed in this song. I love to see the faces of people who understand what they are singing.

          I might write a couple more verses, but maybe not.

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Gae-n0Pb7Q

        6. As an addendum to the above post …

          Check out also Ere zij God [Glory to God]. The magnificent piece is in Dutch, Iā€™ll provide the full text, and then give you the URL to a phenomenal performance. The English translation isnā€™t as nice as the Dutch, and the piano trills annoy me, but overlook that and enjoy the powerhouse organ, immense choir, huge congregation and lusty singing. My church uses this peace as the Doxology for the Sundays during Christmastide. It is more a doxology than a hymn anyway, but it is powerful and moving in Dutch or English.

          Glory to God!
          Glory to God in the highest,
          in the highest, in the highest!
          Peace be on earth,
          peace be on earth,
          to the people whom God delights in.
          Glory to God in the highest!
          Peace be on earth, Peace be on earth, peace be on earth,
          Peace be on earth,
          to the people whom God delights in,
          whom God delights in, whom God delights in.
          Glory to God!
          Glory to God in the highest, in the highest in the highest,
          Peace be on earth, peace be on earth,
          To the people whom God delights in.
          Amen. Amen.

          http://tinyurl.com/m2trfct

          Christian Socialist

    1. I thought there was a Fundy rule against holding the microphone while singing. Or is it only women who are forbidden to hold the microphone?

      BTW, my first thought on seeing this post was not an objection to the innuendo or mocking the song, but that DD’s comment seems to stereotype IFB pastors the same way some people stereotype Catholic priests.

      1. Varies from camp to camp. Some don’t want anyone holding a mic, I think there may be some that just don’t let women hold the mic, some like symmetry where the left side (facing them) holds it with their right hand, and the right side with the left, some like all of them holding it with the same hand. I have no idea who comes up with these ideas and thinks it’s such a great idea to elevate idiotic rules like those to such grand ideals.

      2. The singing groups at Jim Vineyards prsion camp/college hold the microphones in their hands. The girls aren’t allowed to. They have to sing with the microphone on the stand.

        Every IFB singing group has a pianist and sometimes someone will play the fiddle or an acoustic geetar. But no drums since Vineyard uses drums as target practice.

      3. I used to sing solos in church and I was not allowed to touch the mic. One time I got too close because I wasn’t getting good pickup . . and I got talked to afterwards about maintaining a decent distance from the mic. (I’m female).
        Personally though, I don’t like it when singers hold the mic in their hands–mostly because it’s hard for them to stand still and not look ridiculous while doing it. Well, it is for me anyway. And I prefer the style of singing where you are actually belting out good volume from your lungs–I think holding the mic encourages singers to hold back the full force of their voice, which leads to a thin, wishy washy sound.

    2. These guys aren’t even good enough to open for Alvin Martinez. There’s a fundy singer you NEED to listen to. He’s revered in many IFB circles and even sang on TBN’s PTL Club during “Praise A Thon”

  20. I feel bad for Australia on the wall behind them. It looks so lonely out in the middle of nowhere like that!

    1. I saw that too.

      “Where does this piece go?”
      – (Larry the Cable Guy voice) “That there’s Australia. It’s supposed to go Down Under.”
      “Like right here?”
      – “Nope. Not Down Under enough! Down, down, down.”
      “Wouldn’t this be in Antarctica? Shouldn’t we look at a map?”
      – “No, that’s about right. Stick it there.”

  22. Just curious: Where was this taped? That’s a handsome pulpit — such things are rare in IFB churches.

  23. I’d say the most “offensive” song sung in an IFB church has to be “Little Drummer Boy” because drums are a far greater sin than a gal in britches.

    These guys need to be on Merv Griffin and Johnny Carson.

    If you want to see a “real IFB singing group” check out the Singing Sisters from FBC Hammond.
    These old gals were handpicked by the “Pope of Hammond” himself.

    The song they sang at Youth Conference ’91 was

    If we don’t leave with a man
    Then we won’t leave it all
    If we don’t leave with a man
    Then we won’t leave at all
    We’ll walk a long country mile
    For someone just like Dr. Hyles
    If we don’t leave with a man
    Then we won’t leave at all

    The purpose of that “Praise Song” was for one of the young men to escort them off the stage while the Pope scorned some kid for giving him keys. I’ll try to find the YouTube video for it.

    1. Scorning someone for giving him keys? I guess I hadda be there. šŸ™„
      Right now all I can think of is the old “Mr. Jingaling” show out of Cleveland in the ’70s, the theme song went something like, “Mr. Jingaling, he’s a ding-a-ling, Keeper of the Keys…” After 40 years, tune’s still stuck in my head. šŸ˜€

  24. Listened to the clip – the guys blended well and did a good job. This is probably one of the best GOH selections to date.

  26. To each their own, I guess. I’m of the opinion Martinez has average talent…at least, based in the YouTube vids I’ve seen & heard. *shrug*

    1. Trieber and even Schaap believe that Martinez hung the moon and stars as Martinez was the “featured” soloist for the final three pastors school (2009,2010,2011) before they shut down pastors school.

      1. What’s the over under for days or hours until .39 Disco gets banned again for spamming Martinez all over SFL?

  27. Hymns that need to be written:

    * I got Him deep in me
    * Jesus on my lips
    * Oh God, Oh God, Oh God
    * Come in the church
    * On my knees always
    * Wide open and waiting
    * He loves all the children
    * His love is bigger

    …add your own.

    1. All I can say is Martinez can hit those high notes. If you go to Golden State Baptist College, he’s the “Professor of Music”.

    2. Kapitano, you made me laugh so hard, I snorted!

      As far as sexual innuendo goes, there’s “Come, Ye Sinners.” šŸ˜ˆ

  28. “Given the history of IFB churches, this is probably the most unfortunately titled song in the hymnbook.”

    This would have never entered my mind, despite the many differences I have with the IFB and institutionalized churces in general. I appreciate the sentiment of the song.

  29. I always disliked the song for its vague theology. “Something happened and now I know He touched me and made me whole.”

    to me the phrase “something happened” doesn’t adequately sumit up

      1. I suppose that’s a reasonable criticism. I took it as an echo of the man born blind who Christ healed talking to the Pharisees and being very direct – once I was blind, but now I see.

    1. +1 for Fundy Statute of Limitations on Popular Culture = about 30 years

      Ain’t it the truth.

    2. SFL — considering the first few IFB adopters of 29 year old popular culture as dangerously avant garde.

      And then being either trying to be With It by adopting it themselves or Calling It Out from the Pulpit and getting a leg up by separating.

      further SFL — being the last to realize 50-60 year old popular culture is no longer intelligible to the current culture.

      yet further SFL — not caring that 40-50 year old popular culture is no longer meaningful in a relevant way to current culture; considering that fact to actually be an indictment of the current culture and a point of pride that fundies still champion the culture their fundy grandparents would have decried as dangerously avant garde.

  31. I have as good a sense of humor as anyone, but as I read through these posts I feel sympathy for Josh. Listening to a portion of the clip, the vocals are just fine. The unfortunate title of the song aside, as an older guy (BJU grad of 1981) I want to see people treated with kindness. It’s fundamentalism that I have an issue with–not the people who, like me, were taken in by it and left. Blessings to you all.

  32. I nominate the Gaither song, “The sweeter I love him, the longer he grows.” JUST WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS!!!!!!!

  33. Has anyone watched this video and noticed the short guy in the group singing expressions? He has a look that says gosh, maybe I should have not eaten that chili and boloney earlier Iā€™m starting to leak.

  34. On a lighter note. I just loved “Gladly The Cross I’d Bare” When I was young I thought The bear Gladly was going to dance up and down the asle. How fun!

      1. Ah, dear old Gladly. When people, in giving directions, say “Bear left at the church,” that’s the bear. šŸ˜€

  35. To all who see innuendo in this song that speaks of the Lord changing lives:

    “Unto the pure all things are pure: but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled.” – Titus 1:15

    2. Changing lives like the way innocent lives are changed by the physical, mental and sexual abuse that they endure by the so-called religious leaders in fundyland?

        1. While we may take issue with some of the theology in the lyrics we are not attacking the song and except for a few (who may or may not be professionally trained) we are not taking issue with the singers.
          All we are taking issue with is the unfortunate title given the history of the IFB fundamental movement’s enabling of abuse within its ranks.
          Refer to: http://www.chicagomag.com/Chicago-Magazine/January-2013/Let-Us-Prey-Big-Trouble-at-First-Baptist-Church/

        2. I invite you to read my lengthy diatribe toward the top of the comments section. The Indy Fundies have created innuendo for YEARS. They have build libraries of rules to deal with these invented “problems.” They have beaten down two or three generations of young people over innuendo. And now, when some people on this website decide to tweak them over an innuendo, some people are getting a little upset that it is happening.

          It would be nice to think that these upset people are even more upset about the actual behavior of far too many of these Fundy leaders who have used innuendo as a weapon even while committing criminal acts and covering up the crimes of their buddies/relatives. Are you scolding them, too? THEY are deserving of your ire; your censure. Our silly little comments are the mote to your beam.

        3. Of course it’s not Sam. But that is kind of what the post is about. The fact that there can even be innuendo derived from the song title based on the actions of leaders in fundyland.

        4. They are not the ones here seeing dirty things in a song that teaches a great truth about the Lord’s life changing power. I understand that there are a lot of problems with “Fundies” but don’t let that blind you to your responsibility to not be overcome with bitterness and to remain holy. You criticize me, but all I did was point out the inappropriateness of seeing something dirty in an innocent song.

        5. I don’t think anybody is criticizing you, Sam.

          The physicians need to heal themselves.

          Or, better yet, they need to get to know the Great Physician. I fear that many of them have no idea who He is, or that their protestations could be met with those fearsome words: “I never knew YOU.”

        6. Sam – Are you actually defending “they” as in the leaders of fundyland who have perpetrated sexual crimes against people and/or covered up those crimes? “They” get a pass because they are not on a silly web site indulging in 3rd grade humor?

        7. from what I’ve seen (and done) on the thread, nobody has an issue with the song (although I think it’s kind of wishy-washy); it’s the IRONY of the fact that pastors who abuse little children and cover it up could get up on Sunday morning and sing this in front of their whole congregation with a straight face, while the abuse victim sits in the pew and sings along.
          To me, the fact that this has happened–probably more than once–is a chilling irony and a sacrilege.

  36. A lot of the hymns of that style are incredibly sexually charged and, well, femmy (or gay).

    I come to the garden alone…
    and he walks with me
    and he talks with me
    and he tells me i am his own
    and the joy we share while we tarry there

    1. Was it James who would say,

      Andy walks with me
      Andy talks with me
      Andy tickles me under my chin

    2. I used to hate that song because it was so sappy, but then I read an article that the song was inspired by Mary Magdalene meeting Jesus outside the tomb. And then I felt kinda bad.

      Divorced from context, though, it is pretty mushy.

  38. I don’t think it’s inherent dirtiness or sinfulness or even unkindness to see the innuendo in this song – it’s simply awareness of terms currently used within our larger culture. We are now aware of connotations that those who originally wrote the song probably weren’t, and might have avoided if they had then known. It does sound a bit awkward to me now, because I am now aware of the meaning this phrase can have, in the same way that, if I learn that a certain phrase in a song is grammatically or factually incorrect, it will drive me nuts.
    There is no evil or ‘dirtiness’ in pointing out what we now know (terms common in the wider culture), and neither is their evil or dirtiness in laughing at the strange juxtaposition of the term and a religious song.
    I’m generally really not one for jokes relating to sexual offenses, but in this case, I definitely feel Darrel isn’t making a cheap joke, he’s making a comment on the unfortunate state of our current impressions of many IFB leaders, and the terrible crimes that several have been suspected or convicted of.
    Also, a couple Sundays ago I had to keep biting my lips not to laugh when we kept singing “have your way with me”. Not only is it now seen as an euphemism, but it also is such an old-romance-novel euphemism.

  40. Always thought of this hymn whenever I listened to the old Sugarcubes song “Deus,” because in that song (written from the point of view of an unsure atheist – “Deus does not exist, but if he does…”), Bjork sounds extremely creeped out when she sings “He wants to TOUCH me!”

  41. My favorite hymn….I Know Whom I Have Believed…. kicked out of fundyville 10 years ago on my birthday….voted out of membership after getting a divorce……after 31 years of abuse…..My name put up on a big screen, followed by the words, “Conduct Unbecoming a Child of God.” Not once, but 3 times.
    )Called to a meeting of deacons (16 “men”0, not allowed to have a woman with me and asked: “Are you still having sex with your ex?”

    Why did all this happen? Because I let the x live in my house after the divorce….feel free to e-mail me: carleton@oakland.edu

    1. “Sex With My Ex”, sounds like a country song. šŸ˜€
      Hope things have gotten better for you, especially since you left that bunch of losers, even if forcibly.
      Hope too, that you’re still on reasonable terms with your ex. Mine… šŸ™

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