97 thoughts on “Friday Challenge: Caption Contest”

  3. “That’s amazing! This pulpit is big enough for both of us!”

    1. There is no fundy pastor in the world who would EVER utter such nonsense! They may have guest speakers in from time to time but make no mistake the pulpit is only big enouth for one ego, one vision, one personality… the Pastor’s.

      Remember, the size of the pulpit (and or the dais) is directly proportional to the “spirituality” of the one behind it (or on it). It’s an over-compensation thing. 🙄

  4. “Psst! Look at that hot chick over there in the homemade culottes!”

  5. Hey – I can’t see sunlight between that couple back there! Shut up and get out your demerit pad.

      1. So glad you put that comment. It was the first thing I thought of. I’m not quite as ashamed of myself now.

  7. I know the hover-text implies one of these is the dummy, but it’s hard to distinguish which that might be. Both are candidates.

  11. For heaven’s sake! Don’t pinch me in the pulpit! Wait til later when we’re alone! :mrgreen:

  12. On the other photo, I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to put my caption right there on their facebook page (although that would have been fun) so I will put it here… Fifth photo from the last…
    “Whew! That one was silent but DEADLY!”

    1. Heh heh! I wondered that too! I’m not about to put snarky comments on their page!!!

      BTW, that is one absolutely magnificent pulpit! You can see it really well in the last photo.

  14. I see the King James in your left hand. But what are you doing with the NIV? Owwiiiiieee.

    1. I know the pulpit is made out of shittim wood, and this one looks like a beautiful Bullshittim® model. I wonder if the puppet is also made out of shittim wood? Maybe it’s one of those sturdy Fullashittim® models?

      1. +1 for this. Given the two personalities in question, I agree with your assessment.

  17. “If I want your opinion, I’ll shove my hand up your *$$ and move your mouth like a puppet.” – from “The Other Guys”

    1. after further analysis it appears to not be a hernia exam, but instead a prostate milking – from the facial expression I am guessing he either forgot the lube or didn’t warm up the tube

  19. “…Those aren’t PILLOWS!!!!!!!!!!” -from the scene with John Candy and Steve Martin in planes, Trains and Automobiles…”

  23. Byron Foxx, David Chamberlain, and Ed and Debbie Russ… Much as Crown is the flagship college of the “New Fundamentalism” those guys are the new faces and larynges* of New Fundy music. I remember going to some of these conferences…lots of back(side)-slapping and majoring on the minors (“We’re Baptists! Booyah! In your face!”) but little of substance. Not completely devoid, but not quite overflowing, either.

    And also, LOL at the big BJU recruitment display in Crown’s gym. I’m surprised Crown let them through the door.

    *And yes, I checked, the plural of “larynx” is “larynges.” English.

    1. I’m guessing that is the BJU Press school book display. You wonder if aBecka was just around the corner?

    2. Oh hey, Byron Foxx. He is very tight with the pastor of my former church… they travel together promoting bland choir music that is just bouncy enough not to be evil. 😉

    3. I have heard that Byron Foxx is getting an honorary doctorate from Crown at the upcoming graduation.

  26. I meant to ask who the bald guy is in the picture. I guess I’ve been gone too long.

  32. I’ve got, “It’s Friday night & it’s getting tight!”

    Or

    “Won’t you come?”

    😈 😈 😈

  33. Could there be a bigger distinction between men dressed in fancy suits standing behind an ornate pulpit preaching AT people, and Jesus the unemployed carpenter’s son sitting on a hillside teaching people? More and more this just breaks my heart how people have bought into this debauchery. 🙁

  38. OUCH! that HURTS! ok, ok, you can throw my NIV into the pews. . . just please let go!

    2. Yep, I would agree that a lot of these comments are at least approaching inappropriate.

      However. At the risk of not expressing myself adequately, I’ll still say the following:

      One of the blessings of escaping fundamentalism is being allowed to make mistakes. To do the inappropriate or even wrong thing. To get caught up in the moment perhaps, and the anger over what these men have done to theology and the Church. And you’re free to dialogue about it and think. To admit you were wrong or stand by what you said.

      We are only human. And praise God, Christ died for humanity.

  45. For picture #10, I was thinking that there should be a “thinks bubble” coming from the guy on the left “Oh, not that long, boring story again! I hope I can stay awake. I feel myself going…”

  46. I actually like Johnny Pope. He has gotten much more complex and deeper in his older years.

    I have no clue who the other guy is….But he seems very mad at the world.

  47. I wonder what “General Fund” paid for all those INSANE displays for their conference!? Seriously… so sad. They look like a bunch of CEO’s at a cushy business weekend. Laughing and soaking in their *awesomeness*. Yes… this is exactly what Jesus commanded us to do. Hold conferences & spend obsene amounts of money that doesn’t in ANY way help the impoverished or widowed (AKA true “religion”). Sick. 😕 😕 😕

  50. When did Johnny Pope get so OLD??? I knew him when he was just a lad in his twenties. Wow. Now *I* feel old. Dangit! Why did you have to go and tell me who it was? Mutter mumble…

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