Friday Challenge: DIY Gear

The challenge for today is to imagine that SFL ran its own version of a church bookstore. What would the slogans and designs on the merchandise look like?

My own first contribution is this:

Attachments displaying your own ideas for t-shirts, bumper stickers, and cartoon-laden tracts can be mailed to stufffundieslike@gmail.com

88 thoughts on “Friday Challenge: DIY Gear”

  1. My first thought was some kind of mass side hug, but I think that’s stealing from Acuff.

    1. ALL touching is a no-no!! Forget side-hugs (Jon Acuff you rock), high fives are too casual!!

  2. I’d buy a mousepad or t-shirt w/ @JMP’s field guide! Or the fish one on here! Fundy creed is hilarious!

  3. @RJW
    I have never understood why that shadow figure is so popular. I have seen it everywhere, including other countries and other continents. My wife refers to it as the “Hairball Man” since it looks like he is coughing up a hairball.

  4. I’m thinking an ol’ glory burqa. for fundy women who secretly wear britches around the house to put on when they go out to the mailbox.

  5. “members only” lord’s supper gear. complete with “members only of this local independent autonomous assembly of believers do this in remembrance of me” table.

  6. I really like the t-shirt from a few weeks ago that said FAILURE – when your best isn’t good enough. Seriously, I would buy that. And wear it!!

  7. I’m working on a fundy variation of the “coexist” bumper sticker. it’s tough, though, because I find that bumper sticker to be just as obnoxious & self-righteous as anything in the fundy world.

    also, not an original idea, but worth ripping off:

    “in case of rapture, can I have your car?”

  8. How about a Fundy “snuggie” with the Bill Sunday silhouette on it.
    The Billy Sunday Fundy Snuggie

    How about a coffee mug: “HonPhd from SFL”

    “I Survived Fundyland” tee shirts and hats

    A Bumper sticker: “(Be glad) You Don’t Know Jack!”

  9. “there are 2 types of people in this world: ifb’s & members of the vast romish poperist conspiracy”

    (ok, I’m done highjacking the thread for a while)

  10. I’m sure there’s an entire range of “I Survived” slogans.

    Honorary Doctorates! I’d be happy to grant all of you a “Phd. In FUNdamental studies” for the low, low price of a piece of your soul and all your integrity.

  11. “if it ain’t i.f., it ain’t b.”

    I LOVE this one! But I don’t think many people would realize it was farcical.

  12. How about a bumper sticker that says “I drink IBC Root Beer. Helping the weaker brother stumble since 1611.”

    LOL.

  13. I wanna buy a tee shirt for my grandma:

    “I got Schaap Happy at Hammond!” And it would have a silhouette of a grandma getting punched in the face by a preacher.

  14. Slogan for t-shirt or mug:

    The King James Bible: If it was good enough for Jesus, it’s good enough for me

  15. I’ve got a line of fundy decals. (If you use these, I want a commission to supplement my Christian school teacher’s retirement fund.)

    For your exercise bike: “Neither shall the fat remain”
    For your playing cards (Rook or Uno of course): “Deal kindly with me”
    For your golf clubs: “Make thy way straight before my face”
    For your trash can: “Touch not the unclean thing”
    For your birthday cards: “Ye must be born again”
    For your sock drawer or shoe rack: “Can two walk together except the be agreed”
    For your telephone: “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth”
    For your yo-yo or boomerang: “If I go, I will come again”

  16. How about Bible cases with not just a TK screen print and KJV Bible verse but a Red, White and Blue model with a “Conceal-Carry” pocket for your backup piece.

    Ammo with Bible verse references engraved on the casing.

    An entire line of “Whole Armour” bullet-proof vests, and kevlar body armor with Ephesians 6 screen printed on it.

    Bible Belt Belt Buckles…. with a Wordless Bible colored on the Buckle.

    Oh, Darrell we have to get in on that Jesus Magnetic Bracelet thing that I had last year.

  17. SFL Bookstore Signature T-shirts:

    Stuff Fundies Like Website – Sending People to Hell Since 2008

    Stuff Fundies Like Website – All Content Approved by Satan

    Stuff Fundies Like Website – NSFWB (Not Suitable For Weaker Brother)

  18. “in case of rapture, can I have your car?”

    That’s just funny right there. I promise to buy 5 and will fund the production.

    I can still remember sitting around the campfire singing “I wish we’d all been ready”

  19. @Scorpio – “Stuff Fundies Like Website – NSFWB (Not Suitable For Weaker Brother)”

    That has to make the final cut.

  20. SFL not worthy of Kingdom Usefulness” (with a picture of Jim Berg pointing his finger at you kinda like in a Uncle Sam poster, but scarier.)

  21. I just wanna say on a personal note that I so needed you guy’s humor today. Brought just joy to a rather difficult one. I’m not artistic, but I think som kind American flag themed bible cover would be fabulous, especially one that said something about 1611, since America was more than 150 years from being born in 1611! 🙂 I probably would squeal in delight if someone talented graphically would put that together! 🙂

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