35 thoughts on “Drive By Evangelism”

  1. Ah, yes.
    Just the kind of guy I want to fix my roofing, siding, window problems.
    This reminds me of a guy who had his own business and had Bible verses on his car, and a bumper sticker that read:

    Home Improvment Begins
    With A King James Bible

    and, just like this guy, beating your customers over the head with it. I wonder how he stays in business.

  2. Tsk, tsk. Sad. While I’ve never actually seen monstrosities such as this on top of vehicles, I have seen those magnetic white letters proclaiming inflammatory messages such as “God does not love everybody,” “King James Bible,” “Apostate Preaching,” etc etc. The first time I saw one, it took a lot for me not to throw something at them, either a middle finger or something from the window.

    1. Too bad you couldn’t follow them, wait for them to park and get out, then sneak up and rearrange the letters. 😈 Come to think of that, sticking certain magnetic letters on a Fundy’s car would be some kind of wicked fun. 😆

  3. For a second I thought this was another way of describing “Drive-by Tracting,” wherein a bunch of suburbanite teens are driving to the middle of an urban area and kicked out of the church’s 15-passenger van (future SFL article?). They have until the van comes back around the block to get rid of as many tracts as possible before diving back into the safety of the van and being whisked back to hearth and home where they won’t ever have to think about the awful city experience until next Tuesday. And yes, as a city native it was a great spectator sport watching kids from white-collar suburbia gingerly tiptoe through the neighborhood.

  4. I’ve never quite understood the idea of Xian businesses. I get that if you’re Jewish, you’d probably want to go to a Jewish butcher but I don’t see how being Xian has anything to do with one’s skills as a roofer.

    As a carpenter, maybe but even that’s pretty weak.

    I want the guy who’s going to do the best job, not the one who’s going to go to heaven when he’s done.

  5. Oh, Thomas, don’t you see? It’s an opportunity for fundies and evangelicals to do something any Tom, Dick and Harry would do, except they give the ungodly customer (who just wants something fixed, mind you) some tracts and tell them, “Now if you were to die tonight, would you know that you know that you *know* (my old pastor, verbatim), that you would go to heaven?” And after all, it’s not the quality of the job that counts, but that they WIN SOULS!! 😉

    1. The kind of fly-by-night outfits that take on bigger jobs than they can handle, feel persecuted when they aren’t paid for their half-arse work, and for some reason feel that their religious affiliations are relevant to my choice of roofer.

  6. I believe it was Martin Luther who is credited with saying that when a shoemaker becomes a Christian he should make a good shoe and sell it at a fair price. Of course, the whole concept of vocation is completely unknown in the fundamentalist world, and the idea that man’s primary purpose is to win souls (NOT to glorify God and enjoy him forever) certain doesn’t help.

  7. Just what I want to be sitting in my driveway, what a testimony that it will be to the sinners next door. Just kidding of course 😉 I remember the movie “God”. Slammed by fundies. The idea of the movie was to get people to think about God. I think that in this case the name of the business would be adequate. Note the line “Totally change or you can’t be saved enter heaven”. The implied subject of this “sentence” is “You must”
    Jn 3:3(kjv) Jesus answered and said unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.
    I don’t see “totally change” here. “Born Again” is an act of God. It seems this business is promoting “works salvation”.

  8. I normally will not do business with the fish, I’ve found that those who advertise that they’re christian expect you to be satisfied with shoddy workmanship. After all he is going to tithe some of the profit…right?

  9. Although you have to give them some credit. I’m pretty sure that would catch ANYONE’S attention on the highway.

    On note of the “Christian business.” As I’ve seen it, I think Christian businesses think that people will choose them over a “non-Xian business” because they will be “more honest”…which isn’t always the case.

  10. “I’ve found that those who advertise that they’re christian expect you to be satisfied with shoddy workmanship.”

    I’ve found that to be the case with virtually anything that sets itself up as a specifically Christian version of anything else, especially fiction and cinema. They expect you to trade artistic and intellectual excellence for a point of view that gives you the warm and fuzzies.

  11. “I’ve found that to be the case with virtually anything that sets itself up as a specifically Christian version of anything else, especially fiction and cinema.”

    And music! (Frank Garlock’s hymns, anyone?)

    “They expect you to trade artistic and intellectual excellence for a point of view that gives you the warm and fuzzies.”

    Amen! Wait, I meant to say that I agree, but anti-amen to the idea.

    1. Facing the Giants and Fireproof actually suck too when looked at objectively…they are simply so many lightyears in front of most “Christian” films in production value that they have become the “Citizen Kane” of Christian cinema lately.

  12. There’s a very good reason why I have a blanket refusal to watch *any* Christian films, listen to Christian music (minus hymns and other songs sung in church, and about two other artists) or read 99-100% of Christian fiction out there (I give it 1% for those who consider Narnia and LOTR examples of Christian fiction). The quality of most Christian merchandise out there is, overall, not much better. Add that to a worldview that sees sin as something out there that can be avoided if you only stay away from the right (wrong?) things, and those marketing “Christian” _____ have a captive audience who will buy and consume anything pitched at them.

  13. A similar truck was in my driveway last week. It came along with its owner to fix the washer. I’m distantly related to him, and, I’ve got to say, he was quick and efficient.

    But the paint on the verses on his truck is wearing off (the economy hurts everyone), so I think only he and I actually knew what it said. So maybe I was safe.

  14. That guy is advertising a totally work based religion. He even adds his own thoughts into the Bible Verse instead of just letting the verse speak for itself.
    And yes, his bilboard is way over the top. I doubt he is truly born again, if he has to prepare himself in a certain and perfect way to be able to present himself to God before he can enter into heaven.

  15. Sean Payne: “Wow, you are referring to before you professed Christ you mean?”

    Nope, I’m willing to bet she fought those urges while still professing Christ. Crazy, I know.

  16. That sign could also be a safety hazard. I don’t think I’d want to have something sending me over to Heaven earlier than necessary because my attempt at sending the Gospel out led to the thing falling off and blocking the view of traffic.

  17. There was van with a design so similar design that used to drive around the BJU campus during Bible Conference. it had “Ichabod” written in bloody script on a three sided sign that looked nearly as well made as that one.

    You got to love it when Fundies tick off Ultra-nut Fundies to that point.

  18. I’ve seen cars use Christian-themed bumper stickers in random locations to cover up places where the paint has worn through, rust, Bondo, etc. Surely, I doubt God would object to going down to Earl Scheib and paying the $99.95 for a new paint job. And a major Christian radio station where I live actually advises people to decorate their homes like this!

  19. If the driver took all the money he was wasting due to decreased gas mileage from increased wind resistance, he could triple his church’s missions budget.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.