Second Birthdays

Cupcake with Two CandlesIf you’ve ever been asked what your birth date is and responded like this “My birthday is August 13th and my spiritual birthday is June 18th”…you’ve probably been a fundamentalist.

Knowing the date of your second birthday is imperative. If that day and hour are not emblazoned on your consciousness then there’s a good possibility that you didn’t really, really, really mean it. Since really, really meaning it is what actually gets you saved, not knowing the specifics may mean you never were.

If you ever find yourself having lost your salvation date do not panic. There is always a chance to get saved again just to be sure; just be careful not to take a chance on losing it this time by writing down today’s date in the front of your Bible for safe keeping. Then make sure to carry that Bible with at all times. You never know when some other fundamentalists will ask your birthdays.

21 thoughts on “Second Birthdays”

  1. “Since really, really meaning it is what actually gets you saved, not knowing the specifics may mean you never were.”

    Because, you know, our salvation is dependent upon what WE do, not upon what CHRIST did. *coughs*

    This whole problem of being unable to remember the date probably isn’t helped by fundamentalists’ insistence on getting very young children (who are too young to remember dates and details of events!) to “make a decision.” Reading the post I had flashbacks to being at camp as a kid and singing that song “It was on a Sunday/Monday/Tuesday/etc. that somebody touched me…” where you had to stand up on the “day you were saved.” Those of us poor souls who never did remember the date either were forced to once again doubt or were tempted to break the ninth commandment and stand up at any random time.

    1. The people who didn’t remember the day could stand up at the end when they all sang, “It was on a GREAT day…” I HATED that song. I don’t know why. They sang it every time we ever got into a bus. I wonder why we weren’t told not to stand up while in a moving bus. Hmmm… well, I survived.

    2. My sister, who and has served with Wycliffe Bible Translators, has admitted that she cannot remeber the day she was “Saved” (with a capital “S”, Fundy-style) loves the Lord deeply but she loves the Lord deeply, and knows Jesus has washed her sins away. But because she didn’t pray the right “Sinners Prayer, a few people think she is still headed for Hell. And I don’t know if any True Fundies would be involved in a organisation like Wycliffe Bible Translators – it does NOT translate the King James Bible into other languages….

      1. No, we didn’t support Wycliffe Bible Translators, not over the KJV thing, but because it was too “ecumenical.”

  2. Sadly, I have witnessed many poor children be coerced into “making a decision” and writing the date in their Bible. Their parents then INSIST that’s when they were saved (whether or not they actually understood what they were doing). Then they are puzzled as to why it’s not sticking when their child is 15 or 20 or 25.

    “Really, really, really meaning it”= Constantly doubting your salvation, praying to be saved a million times, and still worrying that you will end up in hell should you die or the Lord come back. So you pray again to be sure you “really meant it”. It’s heartbreaking, actually.

    1. The “Sinner’s Prayer” as taught by fundamentalist churches is the reviving of an old heresy known as semi-Pelagianism. I would have no problem if they said, “The sinner’s prayer is only a profession of faith. It isn’t the prayer that saves you.” However, they refuse to do so.

  3. Dude you nailed it. That was me as a kid. I can’t believe this was and is still being taught. It is so dangerous on how they make salvation up to you. I am going to write a thesis on synergism within Fundamentalism.

  4. Haha, well I would have no trouble telling the date of my “rebirth,” seeing how it was the day of my 6th birthday! Remembering the day of the week that it happened is an entirely different matter. Oh well. Guess I’m not really saved after all, since I don’t have a photographic memory. Pity.

  5. Melody, you do know that you can look at a calendar of the year you turned 6 and find out what day of the week it was on, right?? lol

    I agree that it is dangerous to talk a kid into “getting saved.” If a child waits till he is 8 or 9 to actually make a decision himself and then get saved for real, that is much better than doing it at age 5 just to make mommy and daddy happy.

    I don’t remember the date or day of the week I got saved, since I was about 8 and I made the decision on my own in my bedroom one night. I was scared to tell anyone at first because I didn’t want to offend my parents by admitting that I really don’t even remember what I said when I was 5 (I remember praying a prayer, but had no real clue what it all meant…).

  6. ditto RJW…it really is heartbreaking. Stuff like this makes me very thankful that I left fundamentalism…my own kids won’t have to go through the psychological stress of “really meaning it” like I did….

  7. I was fortunate never to experience the “It was on ___day” song until highschool, but of course I was no stranger to salvation anxiety anyway. I always gave my second birthday as my actual sixth birthday, which is when a Bible comic book about the rapture (not Jack Chick, fortunately) scared me into getting saved.

    1. I remember that I was “Saved” at the age of 13 on a MONDAY (at least I made some sort of mental assent – a more profound spirtual experience came later on) since it was the second Monday of a Evanglical outreach Crusade and I was dragged along, kicking and screaming, by my parents, away from a brilliant film on TV. up to that point I thought I WAS a Christian – I didn’t all the right things and, more imprtantly did NONE of the “wrong” things. I DO know God did *something* in my life that night, but it was only after a more profound experience about 7 years later that I was finally sure. *That* experience happenned on a SUNDAY and really did change my life.

  8. I’m totally serious–I really think that this type of thing can be psychologically damaging to kids. Particularly combined w/ scare tactics.

  9. “I really think that this type of thing can be psychologically damaging to kids.”

    Psychologically and spiritually.

  10. I agree with RJW. I remember going through the psychological stress for YEARS! From age 6 to 18…yeah. What a pain really.
    And agree with Amanda. Spiritually damaging also. In many ways.

    And actually, the “really meaning it” idea is not just standard to only children. WAY too many times have I heard it at TEEN “outreach” events. All ya gotta do is say a prayer and WAHLAH! …Sickens me now more than ever. (And they wonder why none of the “new believers” never come back to church???)

  11. I remember how terrified I was all the time when I was a kid and “testamony time” came around. You had to know the date of your salvation otherwise you got the look of death from everyone. I was saved when I was very little and I didn’t remember when. All the guilt trips they put on me gave me soooo many problems with the security of my salvation. Something’s wrong with a system when you have an 8 yr old innocent child daily terrified of going to hell.

  12. 1611 girl, I had a very similar experience, but I was 13. The pastor’s wife had kept me after Sunday school, and being a compliant kid, I “prayed the prayer”. I can remember crossing my fingers behind my back when singing “I’m So Happy and Here’s the Reason Why”. I knew I was living a lie. I made the decision in my bed one night and never told a soul until I was well into my adult years. When interviewing with the deacons and pastors about joining a church (several times over my life) I’d sweat bullets. But I obviously chose well on those churches because they understood what had happened and took my statement of faith in Jesus rather than a date.

  13. I’m new to the site, & have been reading quite a bit here, but this one prompted me to finally speak out. Man oh man, for YEARS upon years, this issue made me more than fearful. I actually spent more than one time in Hospital ER’s due to the tremendous anxiety this caused me that I wasn’t sure of the time or date. Thankfully I have gotten this all settled, yet still at times the old fears pop up & I just give it all to the Lord Jesus once again, thanking Him that His blood has taken it all away. Folks with OCD or other issues must have an especially difficult time with this. I am so thankful for those dear believers who also admit that they can’t put their finger on the date, but they know their Savior just the same. God Bless.

  14. Many years ago, when she was young, and just become a Christian a few weeks previously, a friend of my mother was asked by a Uber-Fundamentlist “Under what scripture were you saved?” Firstly, my mother’s friend didn’t understand that terminology; second, she thought she had put her trust in Jesus, not scripture; and thirdly she couldn’t quote chaper or verse. She said so, and Mr. Uber-Fundamentist said “I doubt you’re a Christian at all.” This disturbed her so much, she had a nevous breakdown, and lost her newborn faith for many years.

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