Commandments Concerning Preparations For The End Of Days

And when it shall come to pass that evil men and seducers shall wax worse and worse and that whirlwind shall be spotted in the thorn tree that thou shalt verily take heed to the words of this game plan for the Apocalypse. For if thou shalt study to do all that is commanded here then thou shalt verily persevere (but not in a Calvinist way) until the Rapture doth come for to carry you home before the really gnarly stuff goes down.

And thou shalt verily harken unto the words of thy leaders and trade in thy paper fiat monies for coins of gold and of silver and of precious stones. So shalt thou gather unto thyself treasure on earth and lock it in state of the art moth-proof and rust-proof and thief-proof containers. And thou shalt also gather unto thyself firearms and bullets for to protect these treasures from those who might think they need them more than thou dost. For there is no such thing as too much gold or too many guns.

For verily perilous times shall come when men shall think it good to persecute the church with strong language and tax codes and snarky jokes about Christians on prime time basic cable. Then shalt thou gird up thy loins and make thy tents ready for departure and flee as a bird to your mountain state wherein thou shalt live as people did aforetime by growing your own food, shooting your own bad guys, and having the woods for thy sanitation.

And when thou has set thyself upon thy hill and has raised thy barricades and formed thy militia and set by thee thy five year supply of freeze dried lasagna then shalt thou know of a certain that thou mayest withstand whatever the beast and false prophet and great whore can throw at you. As it is written “do not be anxious about anything” and again “cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength” and further “Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.” And thou mayest ponder why you ran so far away if you weren’t supposed be scared of anything. While thou art at it, thou mayest also ponder how exactly you’re supposed reach the lost if they’re locked outside your fort.

(Alternatively, if you’re a semi-famous pastor and former Presidential candidate you could just take all your church’s money and leave your flock high and dry by running away to start a survivalist cult in Montana. Or so I would imagine if I were speaking theoretically.)

Independent Baptist Book of Everlasting Rules and Requirements, p 297

172 thoughts on “Commandments Concerning Preparations For The End Of Days”

      1. Ok, now I’ve read it – Having the woods for they sanitation??? 😯

        Also: info on the survivalist cult in Montana please?

        1. Very clever πŸ™‚

          Ok – he hates people who are dependent on government welfare, but he wants a whole bunch of people to move out to a community on the outskirts of a town with 20k people.

          How will they earn enough money to survive?

        2. Groups like these use two main methods: “bleeding the Beast” (as one polygamist cult calls it) by declaring as many members as possible indigent and applying for every aid program possible, sometimes fraudulently; and attempting to sue money out of other people. Some turn to outright robbery, check kiting, etc.

        3. I like how people who genuinely need welfare are horrible and the welfare system is clearly a sign of communism, but when they want to, it’s just fine to take advantage of the government.

  1. Darrell – What page is this on in the “Independent Baptist Book of Everlasting Rules and Requirements”? :mrgreen:

      1. Thanks. Now I can study my leather bound wide-margin IBBERR and do my devotions on this important topic when I’m away from the computer.

    1. Stan, gold and silver is fiat currency. As a commodity, it is only worth what the market says its worth – and when the zombie apocalypse occurs gold and silver will be worth nothing. You can’t eat it. We might as well have an oil standard or wheat standard as a gold standard.

      1. I think mashed potatoes will be the currency of the future.
        Portable, useful, and hypoallergenic.

      2. Doc, you sort of have a point, but I don’t think you understand the definition of fiat currency. Fiat currency has no intrinsic value at all. It is worth what the issuer says it is worth. Commodities are worth, as you say, what the market determines. Hence gold and silver are not fiat currency.

        1. oh yeah, and I intentionally disregarded your point about the zombie apocalypse before. I suppose if that happens, then no, you can’t eat gold or silver, and it would therefore be worthless.

        2. Thanks Joe. That was my point. I’d rather be holding something that has always had intrinsic value than paper off a printing press.

        3. I think everyone’s missing the point, since the Bible is pretty darn clear that Christians shouldn’t be storing up vast amounts of currency (fiat or otherwise) but trusting in the Lord for their needs.

          My treasures are in heaven, but my bank account is FDIC insured.

  2. I think in this day and age I’d rather believe that God is sovereign and believe that He sets kings and governments up and takes them down. That He is good and faithful to those who love Him regardless of what government He has placed them under.

  3. Dude actually says that “the beauty of Montana is that it doesn’t have any large cities”.

    Total datapoint in my theory that fundies just hate human beings and want to be left alone in their cabins in the woods. Other datapoints: Driving people away with all their shenanigans, and rage. Separation piled on separation, etc. Most of the time they hide it behind some kind of spiritual/biblical sounding “principle”, Baldwin just comes out at says that he chose a state primarily for it’s lack of population. What a great way to spread the gospel: go to where the people aren’t.

      1. As a queer, single, Hispanic woman, I’ll not be moving to Montana. Thanks for the offer, though.

        And as a former Californian who hunted for food and participated in shooting competitions, I’m wondering where he gets his silly ideas about California not allowing you to own guns. It’s just STUPID guns you’re not allowed to own.

        Of course, my reading of the Bill of Rights is such that I believe every single high school freshman should take a yearlong course in firearm safety and maintenance, and then be issued a Brown Bess musket, just as our foreparents themselves had when they were writing the Bill of Rights.

        1. Its only in California where you have to own stupid guns – like guns with ridiculous mechanical safties that may fail and cause you to die or a gun with a limited magazine capacity – because those laws have saved so many lives…

          Speaking of which – Feinstein says in order to protect ourseleves from the justice department’s fast and furious scandal where they intentionally supplied international terrorists with weapons in order to gain political support for gun control, now we need gun control. You can’t make up the kind of stupid that gets elected in California.

          Still, If the zombie apocalypse arrives, I may have to move to a state like California, lots of cities to scrounge for supplies, temperate weather that wouldn’t require a bunch of heating or cooling resources, and lots of space and rugged terrain to hide my wolverines in.

          But I am bringing all my illegal in CA weapons – or the “stupid” ones as you called them.

        2. Thanks anyway, but if finding out means having to watch that piece of crap, I’d rather stay in the dark about the wolverines.

        3. BG! I can’t BELIEVE you just insulted “Red Dawn”. Although to be fair I don’t recall much about it, and don’t remember any wolverine reference, so maybe I’m giving it too much credit! πŸ™‚

  4. What a nut job, and the people who post on that website are interesting too. Wonder if they take their video cameras to Walmart?

    I have a fundy aunt and uncle who buy into this sort of crap.

  5. His isolationism is what warns me off. Any time I note adults who are reclusive and exclusive like this, I steer clear, and I also worry about their children. If you feel a need to be hidden away from people, there is a reason, and it will not be a good one. πŸ™

    1. We get them in Alaska all the time. If it isn’t some loopy scheme to never pay taxes on the grounds that the tassels on the flag in the courtroom don’t look right, or something like that, then it’s some utter waste of skin who uses Bible verses to justify raping his daughters.

      They forget that everybody has to come into town sometime and eventually they get caught doing whatever they don’t want people to know they do. The myth is that you can go to Alaska and live in stalwart isolation. The reality is that the fewer neighbors you have, the better your relationships with them need to be, and if you skeeve them out, they’ll do what it takes to make you go away.

      1. Another thing people tend not to mention is that Alaska, “The Last Frontier” (as its license plates claim), is the most federally-subsidized, big-government-intensive place in the whole USA.

      2. I’ve been to Alaska many times and I love the place. But the local mythos about all being rugged individualists who don’t need anyone’s help is a load of hooey.

        1. Oh yes. Alaskans are more likely than people from many other states to know how to dress for the weather or keep a house warm without electricity, but we rely on federal and state funds for the transportation and communication that hold the place together. Alaska only became a state in the Industrial Age.

  6. So I read the first page of his website. He agrees with a quote from Thomas Jefferson about freedom not found in large cities. I wonder if he agrees with Jefferson’s penchant for black women or for his re-writing of the gospels?

    1. Yep.

      Also, the main reason Jefferson had financial troubles was that he spent a fortune on fancy wines.

  7. “And thou mayest ponder why you ran so far away if you weren’t supposed be scared of anything. While thou art at it, thou mayest also ponder how exactly you’re supposed reach the lost if they’re locked outside your fort.”
    Bahaha. Darrell, I sure hope you write enough of these to make an actual book. Because I would SO buy it.

    I wonder if they run because they really cannot handle the pressure of every day life. Trying to live up to impossible standards, believing everyone else is horrid, after a while your brain just gives up. I know I’ve wanted to run away and be a hermit more often than not….

  8. Every once in a while an evangelist comes to our church and preaches about being ready for the end of the world. There was one man who said, “As a matter of fact, I don’t even wear a gold ring or jewelry of any kind because when that atom bomb goes off, if you are within one thousand miles of it, your jewelry will become radioactive and your limbs will melt off. It will be a gruesome sight! Come quickly, Lord Jesus!”

    I don’t really understand that, but I guess his wife was okay with him not wearing a wedding band. I don’t think I would be okay with that. It seems like it would take a lot of time having to explain to people that you really are married.

    One of my friends has a part-time job at her father’s industrial supply warehouse and she says that every once-in-a-while a church person will show up and buy a 50-gallon drum or two. Usually right after the guest evangelist preaches on Israel and the Rapture.

    My Father has always had us have a garden and preserve a lot of our own food. He says that if things ever really go south, and the liberals start throwing Christians in jail for having Bibles, we will be able to hide and live on our food for a while. And it’s cheaper.

    1. “..the liberals start throwing Christians in jail for having Bibles..”

      Preach it sister! I can remember my fundy pastor would always say something along the lines of “when they come and throw me in jail for preaching the Bible, are you still gonna come to church?”

      In hindsight I should have said you have nothing to worry about. The Bible is the last thing you preach.

    2. What amazes me is that when you take into account the amount of crap that these loons spew is that they actually need more fertilizer. I would think they could take what comes out of their mouths and pack it into a barrel.

    3. Don’t worry about the wedding band thing. I’ve been married for a few years now, and people can just tell you’re married, with or without a ring. I don’t know how they know. It just oozes out of your pores or something.

      1. I haven’t ever really worn my wedding ring regularly. I used to work more manual labor jobs where a ring was a bad idea. I am white-collar now, and still don’t wear a ring (or a watch), but that doesn’t bother anyone, even my wife. She doesn’t even wear her rings often anymore. I can remember maybe 2-3 times in 8 1/2 years that anyone has questioned it.

    4. My husband doesn’t wear a wedding ring. He hurt his finger a while ago, and it swelled up. It never did return to its normal size, and we never got around to getting the ring resized. If people know you, they know you’re married. You talk about your spouse and your day-to-day life.

      I would love for him to get it resized, sure, but him not wearing it isn’t all that big a deal in the grand scheme of things. We’re just as married without it as we are with it. πŸ™‚

      1. My husband doesn’t always wear his ring at work. No big deal, and honestly in his line of work I get it. I never wear mine when I’m pregnant. My fingers never swell that much but I can’t stand the way it feels to wear it.

    5. But I thought if you wear a tin foil hat it would somehow reflect the rays. If he’d just wear a tinfoil hat all the time, then he could wear his wedding ring and be just as prepared.

    1. “Chuck Baldwin is a syndicated columnist, radio broadcaster, author, and pastor dedicated to preserving the historic principles upon which America was founded. He was the 2008 Presidential candidate for the Constitution Party.”

      1. I was one of the first members of the Constitution Party in Missouri! It used to be called the tax-payers party πŸ™‚ My grandparents would take me when I was in my early teens to these radical political meetings. They got me so hyped up, I thought joining a militia and taking over the govt. was the only way to “get America back on track” It’s scary to me what I thought back then. I think it was the start to the Tea Party movement. I know the words “we need another tea party” were certainly thrown around a lot. πŸ™„

  9. I really don’t get the Montana thing. It’s cold, it’s dry, a lot of it is above the tree line, and the soil isn’t great for crops. It looks to me a lot less like “hunker down and survive the Apocalypse” than like “choose between starving, freezing, and shooting yourself in the head.”

    Why not move to, say, Alabama, where it’s warm, fertile, and wet–conditions a lot more conducive to surviving without the conditions we’ve come to rely on.

    1. The man moved to Montana from Pensacola, FL which is practically far-south Alabama.

      I mean if you wanted to pick a spot to survive an economic disaster, you’d think warm weather and an ocean full of fish would seem appealing.

      Apparently, the lure of being away from government control is what’s drawing him there.

  10. He has a few valid points scattered between the crazy. The politics of one large city can turn an otherwise “red” state “blue.” PA, for example, is by and large rural (according to square mileage), but since a majority of the population is tied up in Philly and Pittsburgh, and those cities are heavily “blue” (I think Philly more so than Pittsburgh), the state ends up being considered a “blue” state most of the time.

    1. I live in Pennsylvania, also called “Pittsburgh on one end, Philadelphia on the other, and Alabama in between.”

        1. That’s just crazy. Everyone knows if you want a championship city, you have to go to the west side of the state.

      1. I always preferred to call it “Pennsyltucky”, but the “Alabama in the middle” is sadly way more popular.

        1. I like your name better, because like the beautiful Bluegrass Tate, PA is rolling hills, stunning mountains, beautiful farmland, and good people. Both are Commonwealths, too. But Pittsburgh has no decent teams, plus they outweighed our dog-torturer who was punished with their rapist who was not.

    2. The Federal Government, under Obama, allows the “Blace Panther” organization to terrorize voters at polling places and won’t prosecute them.

        1. Those Blace Panthers are an awful nuisance!! Yea, shoulda caught that “Black Panthers” and also should have indicated the state “PA” so thanks for pointing it out.

  11. I went to his website regarding the move to Montana and it’s pretty scary. This thing has the beginnings of Waco written all over it.

    I hope I’m wrong.

  12. Why Montana? Can’t we all go to Hawaii? What about if we duke some really rich guy into buying us an island in the Caribbean? We can get one with a mountain.

    Just a suggestion.


    1. Well, since they don’t want Hawaii, then if SFL ever decided to start a cult, we could have Hawaii. That would be awesomeness, cause it’s kind of a halfway point πŸ™‚

      1. And I’ll open a day spa there so we’d have a place to get our hair and nails done, because I must have my feet done, apocalypse or no. πŸ˜‰

        1. Seriously? I would be thrilled to have a man interested in my French white fingertips and piggies, but not George. He is hardly literate. Sigh. Just my luck. πŸ™

      2. I think the Mormons kindof already have Hawaii staked out for the Apocalypse. Not sure though. We might be able to sneak in there among them.

      3. Man. I’m joining the SFL cult, in that case. Or maybe I can start a second branch in Puerto Rico.

  13. Just wanted to point out that if this crackpot gets a bunch of people to leave the freedom-hating cities to join him, they will eventually form…a city. 😈 In order to avoid becoming that which they despise, I’m sure what they develop will be termed a complex – in more ways than one. πŸ˜‰

  14. Poor Montana! It’s a beautiful state with independent, strong people. They really don’t deserve kooks like these.

    1. Back when the Unabomber had just been caught and the Montana Militia was making the news, and the Mad Cow Disease scare was rocking the beef industry, the state of Montana (coincidentally) held a contest to write a new motto for the state. Two of the finalists were “The last, best place to hide out,” and “At least our cattle are sane.”

      True story.

  15. The wikipedia article states that Chuck believes people misunderstand Southern slavery! What’s to misunderstand about one human being owning another?

    1. For one thing, Baldwin says “that the leaders of the Confederacy were not racists.”

      They just wanted one race to all be slaves to another race. Nah, that’s not racist at all.

      If he follows the thinking of some other Confederate apologists I’ve heard, he also believes that black Americans were better off as slaves than they were (and, presumably, are now) as free men and women. It’s not clear whether any of these experts asked the former slaves about this, but I suspect not.

    2. Of course it’s misunderstood! Why imagine the horrible life those people had before being hunted down, chained to a boat, sold at auction, worked to an early grave, and traded about like tractors! Why, I imagine that their owners and masters treated them so well because no one wants to devalue property! Besides, it was a biblical fulfilling of Ham’s curse.

      1. Sorry about that, Apathetic. Yeah, now I see all the States’ Righters coming over the hill …

    1. Life was filled with guns and war
      And all of us got trampled on the floor
      I wish we’d all been ready
      Children died the days grew cold
      A piece of bread could by a bag of gold
      I wish we’d all been ready

      The proper currency for the Apocalypse is non-perishable food, medicine, and Ammo – the zombie movies have it right. Paper money, gold, silver, etc will only be worth what someone is willing to give you for it, it has very little actual value

    2. tell me about it. i always thought chinese yenn would be the one world currency. but now i see that its probably twinkies XD

  16. Touched on a nerve here. We don’t live in Montana. But we do own guns and plenty of ammo. We do own gold. We do have freeze-dried food and seeds to plant a garden if we need to. I buy clothes on clearance that are for future use. We also have a child with a chronic illness, and if the economy goes to pot we need to be able to care for him and supply his medical needs. And yes, it’s easy to imagine the worst; I’ve had panic attacks over this.

    Do I think God will supply our needs? Yes. And He expects us to be wise and plan ahead. If the economy doesn’t tank, we can still eat our freeze-dried food. If all hell breaks loose, don’t come to my house.

    1. I don’t think anyone’s saying that we shouldn’t be sensible – but you haven’t moved to another state to surround yourself with people who believe the same conspiracy theories as yourself, have you?

      There’s sensible, and there’s nutty. Nutty seems to be taking anything to some bizarre extreme, even if it was ok in moderation.

    2. Your comment reminded me of my dad when he prepared for the Y2K. He had a room full of some kind of army rations, 5 gal. buckets of rations, family size rations with a 20 year shelflife. Oh, I remember visiting once after the dust settled over that scare, I pulled out a prepared packaged lasanga and baked it for dinner…that was aweful, had to throw it out. I felt really bad for the shelters that he donated the food to after that.

  17. I went through a “Disaster Preparedness” phase and people around me were telling me that I should just have faith in God. What kept coming to my mind however was Joseph when he knew there would be a famine he prepared for it. I know we all know *something* bad is coming along eventually. Doesn’t hurt to have a plan. Funny thing though, my first disaster preparedness kit burned up in our first house during the California brush fires. I guess you really can’t prepare for EVERYTHING. But God took care of us in other, better ways. I agree with Tammy though. It doesn’t hurt to be somewhat prepared.

  18. My head hurts. He says that they rejected OK and MO because those states are landlocked and who will come to their aid against the Feds? Perhaps I need to buy an updated globe but I seem to recall Montana being a bit landlocked.
    He rejected AZ and TX because they are on the border. Yet he chose Montana which, as we all know, is located at a safe distance from all international borders.

    1. “Yet he chose Montana which, as we all know, is located at a safe distance from all international borders.”

      I love it. πŸ˜€

      1. His head would explode if he knew how ethnically diverse Canada is, especially in our freedom-hatin’ cities.

        1. But, Apathetic, the French people like sex. And they all smoke and drink wine. And they don’t care WHAT people think about it. They are so… er er how you say… DEES re SPECT ful. How can the fundies like them at all? (That was typed entirely in a horrible French accent.)

        2. It might be that fundies think all Frenchmen are like Pepe Le Pew. He was always in the mood for love and chasing Penelope the Cat and if that ain’t interracial then I don’t know what is. Haymen?

        3. Might be a hold-over from when the Americans were (gasp!) British colonists, since we all know the French and British hate each other… (historically, mostly, I think)

          I think it might have something to do with the French traditionally being Catholic, myself.

  19. I have no issue with disaster preparation. I spent most of my life living in hurricane country where keeping water and food on hand just was good common sense.

    The issue I have is when the plan for long-term survival involves abandoning everyone else in your community to fend for themselves and running away from it all to hide. Note that Joseph didn’t just store up enough for himself. He fed the whole country. And people from other countries.

    So I ask, what is the Christian’s response to great need? To run away and hide from the world and take care of us four and no more? That doesn’t really seem to be the model we’ve been given.

    1. I agree, Darrell. I just sometimes feel like I am needing to be secretive about my preparations because of other more spiritual people who plan to just trust God (and then probably want to come live with me.) But I do get your point and agree with you entirely. We had some people in our old church who decided to sell their homes and move out of California and start their own little compound in some other state. They bought land together with friends, and were planning to farm it and live off it. Last I heard, their crops failed and their trailer that they were living in burned to the ground. They aren’t even speaking to the other families in the group as they all feel somehow cheated of everything they invested. They are starting all over from scratch now, much poorer and wiser. There have been times it seems tempting to just run and hide from all of it, but the problem is, there is nowhere that there ISN’T the possibility of some sort of trouble. Jesus promised us that in this world we will have trouble. We shouldn’t make decisions out of fear of it.

    2. Back when people were flipping out about Y2K, a conservative Christian posted a survival handbook I could really get behind. She included a whole chapter about neighbors. Every person should have at least one skill that can be traded to the neighbors, she said: bicycle repair, use and repair of manual typewriters, barefoot doctoring, clothing repair, carpentry, etc. Also, she said, everybody should get to know their neighbors now. Swiss Family Robinson and Farnham’s Freehold are fantasies. The reality is that it takes a village to maintain a way of life that is more than nasty, brutish, and short.

    3. Some people (I don’t remember just who) have done studies of people who survived cataclysms like the Holocaust and the Siege of Leningrad. They found that the lone wolf types who tried to hole up and ride it out on their own tended not to do so well. It was the people who banded together and helped each other who were more likely to survive, and especially to survive with their sanity intact.
      Of course, there was also a large element of chance in who survived or perished, but there was a clear trend in favor of people who were more altruistic, or at least cooperative.

      1. That’s especially interesting to me right now because someone on the forum posted that the verse about not forsaking gathering together actually meant that even though they were being persecuted and feared for their lives, they were to stick together.

        So the concept of sticking together in hard times might apply to a range of people in different disaster situations. Which explains why SFL is so important to people who have come out of the IFB – it’s a disaster on an individual level.

  20. I wonder if the area where they moved was named the Flathead Valley before they got there? Or did the locals rename it in their honor?

    (BTW. I know the answer, I am just in a snarky mood today)

    1. According to Urban Dictionary ‘flathead’ is: A term used to describe someone with few or no brains or common sense, resulting from repeated beating of one’s head against the wall. An antiquated term from mid-20th century.

  21. Let’s all just hunker in our bunker til Jesus comes to rapture us out of here. We’ll just occupy til Jesus comes.

    This whole mentality that Christians are going to be raputed out so that they wont have to suffer through any bad is Biblical ignorance. If that happens it will be the first time in all of history that God delivered his people out of trial and tribulation. He has always delivered his people through the trials and tribulation.

    How will people in the tribulation be saved if there are no Christians there to tell them about Christ? The Christian’s testimony of facing the trials with grace would seem to be a greater testimony to the Grace and power of the gospel than some mysterious disappearance of a remnant of people.

    The whole Margret McDonald, J.N. Darby, C.I. Scofield, John Hege, Tim LeHaye theory with it’s Larkin eschatological blueprints on endtimes theology is more harmful to Christianity than about anything I know. It creates the complacent christian. One who is content with having said the magic words so that they have their “Get outta Hell Free” card safely tucked away in their bilfolds. Then they are satisified with hiunkering in the bunker and occupyin tol Jesus comes. And they have the audacity to cast stones at the OWS folks? God help us.

    1. “Then they are satisified with hunkering in the bunker and occupying til Jesus comes.”
      **george takes over typing when I jump up on the soap box.

      1. I read too many blogs so when I see OWS, I think first of the OWG, or One World Government, and so OWS means “One World S___, Oh wait a minute, I mean Occupy Wall Street”

  22. Why didn’t he just move to Alaska? The population density there averages to about 1 person per square mile. Compared to Alaska, even Montana seems crowded! πŸ˜†

    1. Alaska is probably too close to other countries, like Russia and Canada. He said he ruled out Arizona and Texas because there are too many furriners nearby. Yes, I know that on your map, it looks like Montana has an international border, but apparently he has a different map.

      1. Don’t forget, he’d have to actually drive through a “furrin” country to get to Alaska. So that adds to Alaska not making the final cut.

        1. There are a few islands off the coast of Alaska that he might be very comfortable on. Problem is getting there. And once you are there you pretty much have to stay there. Seems perfect for his stated intents. The problem is, he still wants PEOPLE to come to his revival meetings and conferences and stuff. So he doesn’t REALLY want to be isolated, he just wants to give off the IMPRESSION of isolation.

    1. The Crazies over at the Compound? The Nutjob Cult members? *Those* people? Look Out, There’s One Of Them, Play Dead So They Won’t Try To Engage In Conversation?

      1. I love yours, Sims. For some reason, I immediately came up with “The Fungus.” As in There is a fungus among us? Lame, yes. They say the mind is the first thing to go…

  23. Here’s a little tip, Chuck Baldwin:
    If you’re really trying to hide out from the big, bad oppressors you think are going to try to take your guns away, it’s not a good idea to advertise your location everywhere, the way you’ve been doing. It sort of defeats the purpose of hiding out, y’know.

    1. hahahaha. Maybe that’s not his real purpose after all, maybe he is useing the end days scare tactic to give followers a sense of comfort, safety and hope without realizing his real intention…a cult compound.

  24. I’ve often wondered how one paranoid friend will prepare his silver for eating when “things get bad”. I was told that there would always be a market for gold and silver. I let the conversation go. I figure during the “evil to come” we’ll just make do. My preparation looks a lot like my tool collection.

    1. UncleWilver, this is what I heard, they are piling up silver and gold in preparration to get rich in the end days. All the gold will be used to rebuild the temple. Sorta sounds like they are in on building a temple ultimatly for the “anti-christ”.

    2. If the world does fall down and survivalists are left alive, they will begin feuding within their own compounds as soon as they stop being comfortable. I give them until about three days after the last of the toilet paper is gone.

  25. Honestly, when the zombie apocalypse comes, I’m thinking of siding with the zombies. They sound nicer than people.

  26. Kind of off topic, but has anyone else seen the Montana Governor branding “BS” bills from the legislature with his veto brand?

  27. That’ll preach! Excellent post. And hitting close to home. Members of my family have been builind a compound for years that they want all the family to come live on to close out the world so we can live in Christian harmony and forget about the pagans. The funny thing is when they bought the property 20 years ago, it was in the middle of no where. there was absolutely nothing around it. Now, it’s smack dab in the middle of suburbia like the North and They’ve been offered a lot of money to sell out and they won’t. It’s hysterical to view it on google maps satelite. All nice houses, schools and shopping and then there’s this dense thick growth of trees with a fence and a glimpse of a house or two through the tree overgrowth.

  28. I am not a survivalist. I am a Texan, so naturally I have a couple of guns but nothing rediculous or automatic. I would never leave the city for the country to wait out the return of Jesus. I have an atheist gay friend that keeps a large rubbermaid tote in his garage that has four gallons of fuel, six mre’s, 200 real silver dollars, a tent, a loaded colt 45 and a sleeping bag. I asked him why he says that when the shit goes down like it did during hurricane katrina he has enough to make it to his family farm and a country boy can survive. Sounds crazy but i understand his point of view

  29. Is it sad that i went to Amazon to try to buy the “Independent Baptist Book of Everlasting Rules and Requirements” book? I thought it would make a great gag gift. Sigh for my gullibility πŸ™„ .

    1. That’s only because I haven’t written it yet.

      It’s coming to stores everywhere in June of 2045.

  30. Well, I wait with great enthusiasm. πŸ˜› BTW, I am writing a book on Church, not just fundamentalism, but many other systems of thought that tend to be viral in the American Church scene. It’ll be a while in writing, but maybe I can collaborate with you. πŸ™‚

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