FWOTW: ancientbaptistchurch.com

Todays’ FWOTW is a church website that has a little of everything.

Conflation of God and Country.

A color Trail of Blood chart

Pirated Movies! (At least I’m assuming that BJU hasn’t put Sheffy into the Public Domain yet)

Pirated Audio!

And oh, so much more!

Update: An alert reader has pointed out that we’ve actually seen this guy before: http://www.stufffundieslike.com/2010/03/fwotw-theoldpathsbaptist-com/. Evidently he’s gone from “oldpaths” to “ancientpaths” and actually has a church now instead of just raising support.

Update 2: Apparently, since this was posted all the video has been hidden or removed.

193 thoughts on “FWOTW: ancientbaptistchurch.com”

  1. Because clearly, if you’re on the right path, you’re untouchable with respect to copyright violations. God won’t care if you’re doing it for His glory, amen?

    1. Also on that page: “Bro. Dan knows how important his family is to him, in that he states often that God instituted the home before he ever instituted the local church.”

      Ack. His family is important to him, and that is evidenced by things he SAYS? That reminds me of another fundy pastor who was recently in the news, who “loved his wife and children dearly and spoke almost non-stop about them.”

      1. If I were the second wife, I’d feel a little offended that I wasn’t pictured as well. Not even mentioning as at least one of the top 4 “most precious ladies in his life.”

      1. I used to have a job that involved taking down a lot of biographical information from people. When I was new at the job, I remember asking a man, “Is Jane Doe your first wife?” Mr. Doe looked confused, and said, “She’s my only wife.”

    2. He’s making a point. In many of the fundy churches I’ve been around – the ‘never been divorced’ thing is a really big deal. If you have, no matter for what reason, forgetaboudit…no ministry for you. Next!

      1. Could be, but if I were in her shoes, I think I’d rather be the “first and only” wife.

        I’ve heard in some churches that the pastor’s wife is called the first lady. (I never was.) But I don’t think that’s probably what Ancient Baptist Church was going for.

      1. ….and in reference to the web site…..wow.

        SO many things ……

        BTW Never seen a preacher with a coat rack behind him for his coat before!

      2. Here is a complementary fifth for your fourth. This was secret fourth Saturday. For putting forth the effort to be first and ending up fourth you get todays fifth for fourth. πŸ˜‰

    1. I’d like to recommend they try some of the ancient drinking water! A few days of violent GastroIntestinal upheaval, might help remedy the obsession w/ all things “ancient”… πŸ™‚

        1. I just remembered the bumper sticker I’ve seen on cars of neo-pagans, Wiccans, Druids, and the like: “Give me that old-time religion!”

        2. “Let us worship Aphrodite.
          She is beautiful but flighty,
          And she doesn’t wear a nightie,
          But she’s good enough for me!”

  2. What’s funny is that the church is non-denominational and then in the next line it says that it’s baptist. I bet the guy doesn’t even know what non-denominational means.

  3. OH THANK GOD!!!! I was searching all over thepiratebay.org, and I couldn’t find a good rip of Sheffey! I was looking for an aXXo rip, or at least FxG team, but couldn’t find it……. Random Baptist church FTW! πŸ™„

  4. The Old Path just isn’t separated enough, no in order to be as right as we are you have to be on the “Ancient Path.” Bless god this church was founded by John the Baptist and Jesus was a charter member! Say “Honolulu!”

    Our bible doctrine and history dates all the way back to John the Baptist, who Immersed Jesus Christ into the river Jordon over 1900 years ago.

    We are Bible Believers. We believe that the King James Bible Translation of 1611 is God’s perfectly preserved Words in English today. Every word is exactly what God wanted it to be, and needs no correction by man.

    I’ll be willing to bet that this statement is a lie. In fact I’ll put my money where my mouth is, I’ll wager $50 dollars (USD) that they do not use the the King James 1611 as originally translated and published in 1611.

    If that statement is true then why did they use this reference:
    Jeremiah 6:16 “Thus saith the LORD, Stand ye in the ways, and see, and ask for the old paths, where is the good way, and walk therein, and ye shall find rest for your souls.”
    The 1611 reads:
    Thus saith the Lord, Stand ye in the wayes and see, and aske for the old paths, where is the good way, and walke therein, and ye shall finde rest for your soules: but they said, We will not walke therein. (and that is only what i could reproduce with the fonts available to me.)
    BUT Every word is exactly what God wanted it to be, and needs no correction by man.

    Tell you what, I’ll make it $100 and Darrel can put us in contact with one another if I lose so I can pay up. Check the Bibles being used in this church, Turn to 1 Corinthians 13 verses 1-3. Which of the following set of verses are exactly like the ones inthe Bibles uses in this church?
    The 1611 and 1760 texts of the first three verses from I Corinthians 13 are given below.

    1. Though I speake with the tongues of men & of Angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brasse or a tinkling cymbal. 2 And though I have the gift of prophesie, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge: and though I have all faith, so that I could remoove mountaines, and have no charitie, I am nothing. 3 And though I bestowe all my goods to feede the poore, and though I give my body to bee burned, and have not charitie, it profiteth me nothing.

    1. Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. 2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. 3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

    In these three verses, there are eleven changes of spelling, nine changes of typesetting, three changes of punctuation, and one variant text – where “not charity” is substituted for “no charity” in verse two, in the erroneous belief that the original reading was a misprint.


    1. “We are Bible Believers. We believe that the King James Bible Translation of 1611 is God’s perfectly preserved Words in English today. Every word is exactly what God wanted it to be, and needs no correction by man.”

      I just don’t understand this either. I have come to the conclusion that these people simply must not know what they are saying; they are merely rehashing what they heard other fundies say – and that is scary.

      1. As a translator, I have to say that anybody who says anything remotely similar to this has no idea how translations work, let alone any idea of the problems in reading and editing ancient texts.

  5. The music that plays as you land on the website is enough to make me run from the room screaming. I couldn’t hit the mute button fast enough.

    Statement of Faith should also say “If you don’t believe exactly like us, well, then, enjoy your stay in Hell for eternity, Brother.”

  6. They have a log at the bottom that records where all the “visitors to the site” are from and where they linked from – 95% of the logs are coming from stufffundieslike.com! YES

  7. Anybody know if that guy carrying the cross on the upper right is Fred from Scooby-Doo?

    Why’s he carrying the cross anyway? I thought the point was that Jesus bore the cross for us?

      1. “Anybody know if that guy carrying the cross on the upper right is Fred from Scooby-Doo?”

        No, it’s the Pastor: and he would have gotten away with it if it hadn’t been for you pesky kids.

  8. We’re on a roll with visitors on this site from SFL!!
    Check out the feed on the right side of the site. Let’s try to get SFL from all fifty states to stop in and say “Hi!” I just took care of New York πŸ™‚

  9. His bio says he served in the USMC. That I can respect. But now he has his own little army to rule over. Because that’s what Jesus meant by loving one another.

    2 Tim. 4:1-4 “I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Iesus Christ, who shall iudge the quicke and the dead at his appearing, and his kingdome: Preach the word, be instant in season, out of season, reprooue, rebuke, exhort with all long suffering & doctrine. For the time wil come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but after their owne lusts shall they heape to themselues teachers, hauing itching eares: And they shall turne away their eares from the trueth, and shall be turned vnto fables.

    That’s not what he posted on his site. But that’s the 1611 folks. Every time I hear someone say they only use the 1611 I wanna puke. Especially when it’s a person who struggles to put together a coherent sentence. (And I’m not saying that condescendingly.)

    And I’m so glad he’s referenced a flaming Calvinist as their Baptist founder. Wake up, people! Spurgeon was a CALVINIST.

    I’d like a reference for that information about the Methodist preacher’s recommendation for everyone to “tip their hat” to the Baptists. I think that’s one of those urban legends; I couldn’t find info on it anywhere online except a word-for-word quotation on other sites like this one.

    And this church must really be ancient if they have a photo of John the Baptist’s HEAD. WTH?

    1. In regards to his piece on “hat tip to Baptists”. In the article he gives the impression that Baptists founded the colony of Rhode Island and that Roger Williams, the founder of RI, was a Baptist. This is simply not true. He was a Puritan, but he did not believe, as some of the other colonies did, in the persecution of other religions. Also, he again implies that RI and the Baptists led the charge to make the US and independent country. Again, this is not necessarily true. In fact, of the original 13 colonies, RI was the last to ratify the Constitution in the year 1790. Hardly what I would call leading the charge.

      1. Just to correct myself. Williams did become a Baptist later in life, but his roots were in Puritanism and Congregationalism. He did not go to RI as a Baptist, but later after being there founded a Baptist church. Also, his influence on Baptist history was hardly influential.

        Just to clarify.

  10. Dang, another storefront religious boutique.

    Β· We believe that believers ought to live holy, separated lives in this present ungodly world. They should avoid ungodly entertainment, ungodly apparel and ungodly practices. We are to come out from among the world and be separate from all neo-evangelicalism and ecumenicalism and to have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness but rather reprove them.

    Don’t tell me they are using 2 Timothy 4:2 as their proo-text for this legalistic fabrication?

    I beieve I’d rather go the “Lift Bar and Grill” next door.

    1. I’m reporting this to the IRS. If they are going to advertise for political appointees, they can darned well pay their taxes. Bye bye, 501C3…

        1. No, they take up offerings but the pastor works as a private contractor… if he actually reports any income.

  11. Β· We believe that we are called to evangelize the world and preach the gospel to each and every man and woman.

    This little church has their work cutout for them, as of 5pm eastern today the estimated world population was 6,927,136,312

    It’s a daunting task for a church that is so separated from other Christians. They believe they are the only ones with the truth… they’d better get at it so all those billions of people’s blood is not on their hands. They are going to be held personally accountable for all those that die before this group can get to them. That is an awesome burden to bear, but I’m sure they are up to the task.

    1. Those sermons are going to have to be very short, too, since there are only around 30 seats in their meeting room. Moving 6,900,000,000 or so people in and out of 30 seats before they all die of old age is quite a logistical challenge.

  12. At least they had the character to steal a movie about a Methodist preacher. Stealig a movie about a Baptist preacher would just be wrong.

    1. Looks like they’re tiny fairy folk hiding among the giant ferns.

      If I’m not mistaken, Boise looks nothing like a rainforest. They probably ought to be tiny fairy folk hiding among a pile of taters.

  13. So glad to have the “trail of blood” in color. Never forget the first time I got chewed out for saying we were protestants – yikes.

    What is up with the dudes funeral link having an exclamation point after it? Was it that exciting?

  14. Why do they think that “old fashioned” is appealing to people? Then they ridicule churches that actually use ancient practices in their churches.

    He also has his children listed in numeric order.

    1. Fundy definition of “old fashioned” generally means it came from a mythical, hyper-moral middle America somewhere between 1948-1955. Before rock and roll.

    1. I think the idea is to avoid giving any credit to the Catholic church at all. If we are Protestant, we have a joint history with the Catholic church if you go back in time enough. But if we are not Protestant, we can claim to have been separate from the Catholics from the very, very beginning of Christianity.

    2. The site says,

      “We are Baptists!
      “We are NOT a Protestant denomination, because we were NEVER part of the Catholic religion!”

      Exclamation points aside, Where’s The Fruitcake??
      Do they really have that little idea of European history?

      ❓ ❓ ❗ ❓

      Yeah, well, I’m not really an American, because I was beamed here from the planet Raskalulon 30 years ago. And I learned English from the original Francis Bacon, which is why I can only read books printed in the early 17th century. πŸ‘Ώ

  15. “We still worship the old fashioned way!” By the way, “watch our services live!”

    Not sure what’s old-fashioned about recording one’s worship service and broadcasting it over the interwebz. Sounds downright newfangled to me!

  16. Gosh. Who designed this site. They used joomla for the cms, but neglected the changing the logo next to the title from the standard joomla…… W3 validator only has 39 errors…. Not totally awful like some of them have been… The design, well, it’s like you crossed baby Einstein (right toolbar deal) and, as one mentioned previously, rainforest cafe. And honestly? Auto playing music? geez. Not to mention the disgusting overabundance of exclamation points, comic sans, and random people pointing at me out of the header….

    1. Also, click to make this your homepage….. It’s a fail in chrome… Although I know crakenpants is using firefox :mrgreen: so he could try with that…..

    2. Former typesetter here… old habits die hard. :mrgreen:

      Actually, using Comic Sans is not one of their design sins (Comic Sans has no italic font). What they’re using is one of the comic book style fonts, but not Blambot or Comic Commando – I have both of those and when I pulled up the actual site the headline: A Church in Boise, Idaho! came up, it was in boring Times New Roman.

  17. I have never been to a church that had the pastors picture on the sign!! Bad enough that churches often have the pastors name on the listing of services outside. As if that is a reason to go to that church……..

  18. OK, so much to say so little time.

    First, the statement of faith. Gotta love when someone starts their SOF with their stance on the AV 1611 then moves on immediately to their Baptist heritage. No mention of God and His characteristics or attributes. No statement on the person or work of Jesus Christ. No stance on the Holy Spirit. Virtually their entire SOF of is a statement of opinion as hardly any of it is based on Scripture. A SOF should be based upon the Bible and the what the Bible tells us about God and our relationship with Him.

    Next, yes, the baptist history is taken from Spurgeon, a Calvinist (which wasn’t uncommon back then, to be a Baptist and a Calvinist.) But it gets even more weird when you go to the audio book page and look at the pictures of the books they have listed. Books by Whitefield, Bunyan, Spurgeon, Edwards, and (gasp! oh my word!) Augustine!!! All Calvinists. (not that I mind, just pointing out the hypocrisy.) Plus the picture in the upper left hand corner is not a book, it’s a cd cover of CCM called Unshackled; Living in Outrageous Grace which includes songs by Stuart Townend, etc. Hardly sounds like the ancient paths.

      1. @ Big Gary Yes, Augustine lived long before Calvin, but by Calvinism I mean the doctrine of election or predestination which Augustine held to. I personally prefer that term over Calvinism, but many continue to hold onto the term so I use it. Both Calvin and Luther link their beliefs in the doctrine of election back to the writings of Augustine and credit him for helping them develop their own beliefs. Hence I refer to Augustine as a Calvinist thought it may be best to refer to Calvin as an Augustinian, but then know one would know what I was talking about. Oh wait, that wouldn’t necessarily be anything new. πŸ™„

    1. My church’s beliefs page is like that. The Scriptures statement is first; sovereign God is farther down the page πŸ™„ Yes, I know we know what we know about God from the Bible, but God was there before the Bible. No God, no Bible. No Bible, still a God.

  19. I just noticed the old-fashioned phone next to their phone number at the top. I think I have to quibble though: I’m not sure if I’d call the phone “ancient”!

  20. When I saw this site, I blacked out. When I woke up, my entire house was torn apart and my car was on fire… πŸ˜‰ Even though I escaped four years ago it’s hard for me to stomach the unleashed idiocy that comes from this mindset. πŸ‘Ώ

  21. Reminds me of another song… (ya’ll are going to get tired of these soon enough)

    Gimme that Ancient Baptist Religion

    Now give me that Ancient Baptist religion
    Give me that Ancient Baptist religion
    Give me that Ancient Baptist religion
    cause it’s good enough for me

    It was good for keeping our mothers in line …

    Makes me Judge everybody,…

    It was good for our father’s egos,…

    It was good for those Baptist Hebrew children,..

    It was good for Paul and Silas,….

    It will do when I am dying,
    Baptist born, and bred, and dead,
    It will do when I am dying,
    Baptist born, and bred, and dead..

    It was good for the prophet Daniel,
    That good old Ancient, Baptist Daniel.
    It was good for the prophet Daniel,
    And its good enough for me.

    It was tried in the fiery furnace,
    Now we celebrate with cross burnings
    It was tried in the fiery furnace,
    Make that an Xtra large White Sheet for me

    It will take all us Baptists to heaven,
    It will take all us Baptists to heaven
    It will take all us Baptists to heaven
    …and that’s good enough for me!

  22. Saw this Under “dead or alive”. “God Tells Us That The Woman Was Deceived And That She Was The First To Disobey God’s Command! – After The Woman Disobeyed God’s Command, She Led Her Husband To Disobey God’s Command – The Man Was Not Deceived, But He Chose Willfully To Follow His Wife Instead Of Obeying God! – That Is Why The Scripture Says For The Woman To Learn In Silence With All Subjection Under The Man, And Not To Teach Or Usurp Authority Over The Man! – God’s Word Tells Us In: I Timothy 2:11-14 β€œLet the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.”

    Well women – better stop writting on here! LOL

    1. Which is worse – to be deceived about what is right and wrong, or to willfully choose to do what you know is wrong?

      So maybe women should talk more to tell their husbands not to willfully sin, and to discuss with their husbands (and other women) so as not to be deceived again. And, of course, to break the pattern, men should man up and stop blaming women for their own stupidity… And women should start checking their sources (this not assuming their husband or pastor is right)…

      Sorry, I’m thinking out loud. I’ll stop now.

  23. I love all the exclamation points!
    It’s like yelling!
    But not!
    Just trying to be forceful in the point they are making!

    All the “exclamation point” points they are making seem contradictory if one assumes they are talking about their church.

    We are a new church! but 300 years older than the catholics!?? And Ancient!??

    We are Christian! but not Protestant!

    What a great site!!

  24. I am pretty ticked off.
    There is a funeral video on there of Micah Henson. I knew Micah Henson, he was a good kid and wrote quite a few good songs. He was a fundy, but still, they exploit his death for internet traffic?

    It’s a funeral you {expletive deleted} {expletive deleted}. I can’t believe these people- pond scum.

    I am sickened by this.

    1. Yes, you did. If you dig around his site, you’ll find he has a broad section on a fundamentalist conceit called the Trail of Blood. It’s BS history, but this takes it to the extreme position of claiming that he traces his Baptist lineage all the way to John the Baptist, founder of the Baptists.

      1. Well, some folks say
        That John was a Baptist,
        And some folks say
        He was a Jew,
        But the Holy Bible tells us
        That he was a preacher too.

        — Folk song, as recorded by Woody Guthrie

  25. I’d like to say that I helped represent Oklahoma on their list of recent visitors! First of all, their web page is a joke. I mean, it looks like a fake website. Also, it looks like a 10 year old created it. Wait, I have a 10 year old; she could have done a much better job. I was a “lifer” fundy, and with the exception of my father, who weighs about 140 lbs soaking wet, it seems like all these preachers are morbidly obese. They all look alike too. I don’t get it. I really hope the preacher visits OUR page!

    1. It’s the flattop haircut he’s wearing. It really shows off the curves in his face.

      When you’re that large, you can’t wear a high & tight. It’s disproportionate and makes you look larger than you are.

      Seriously, grow your sidewalls out dude…

      1. The haircut is very effective for making his head look bullet-shaped.
        I don’t know if that’s the look he was going for or not, though.

  26. I couldn’t sleep, so I looked up this guy through Google. It was quite informative.

    So the guy is from Georgia and finds that he has a burden for the “unchurched Northwest” and that there are no Bible believing churches in the Northwestern U.S. (one of his reference letters that he has posted is from a pastor who says that there are very few Christian churches in the “Midwest). His plan is to act as a wheel hub and that churches would grow around his church like spokes.

    So he goes on deputation for three years and earns enough to go to Rapid City, SD, where God has told him there is no Christian witness and that he is to be that witness. He rents a storefront, fixes it up, and begins holding services. This all occurred less than a year ago.

    Then, one day he’s driving around and finds that about a half-mile from his new church is another IFB, KJV-only church. This one even has a permanent building and an attached ACE school. It’s been there for 32 years. I looked at their website and their pastor, who started the church, has virtually the same story as this guy. Except he’s from Indiana instead of Georgia. The “Judas from Indiana” is a guy who started a church plant there 32 years before this new guy.

    A half-mile away. Seriously.

    Anyway, at this point, God amends His message to the guy and says that he is now to move to Boise, Idaho, and plant a new church in another “lost city.” And that this church is to be 9 miles by interstate from the closer of the *two* IFB, KJV-only churches in the area. Both of appear to be large and have day schools.

    I’m sure he heard God right this time.

    1. Good work Dude. I love how many times God is wrong with fundies. Why can’t they just admit that THEY made a bad decision or things just didn’t work out or THEY just made a bad decision. :mrgreen:

    2. Dude, it gets even more interesting. Friends who grew up near Boise and have told me about Treasure Valley Baptist. So I went googling, and sure enough, there they are. TVBC not only has a school, they a Bible Institute AND they have a Pastor’s School in August. Wanna guess who one of the guest speaker is? Sam Gipp. Yup. I recall my friends having heard Ruckman at TVBC. Do I hear the rumble of U-Haul trucks coming back…again? They keep misunderstanding God’s leading and moving west they’ll eventually get to Hawaii. Honolulu! They wanna GO there!

  27. I’m not about to diss the military; I have respect for it. But I am curious about the fact that this is the second instance of a military officer-turned-IFB preacher that’s been presented this past week. There have been others on this site, and I know of others personally. Is there something about the military mindset — regimentation, rules, and order — that is conducive to this? It’s a question worth pondering.

    1. WP, there’s lots of IBF’ers in the military, just like there’s lots of Catholics, Methodists, and Lutherans. I’d reason that there is an IBF church near every military base/post in America and even overseas. Boise is (close enough) to Mountain Home AFB. Ellsworth AFB is close to Rapid City, SD.

    2. You are correct. 20yrs plus military and I have seen IFB thrive by military bases. One reason is definitely the commander take charge pastors RULE the congregation. This is easily accepted by most military. Also the constant influx of newbies to keep your work going when you offend the folks that have been there a while. The last church I was in we counted up over 1500 members had been through there in the course of 15yrs! The church has aprox 160 members at any given time. Most leave not because of military moves but because they get tired of the excessive control.

    3. I’ve been in the Navy for 15 years and had my share of run-ins. It all sounds good at first. Pro-military, good values, etc. Then I have to counsel a young Sailor because he got offended or pressured. Ugly.

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