Nobody does advertising quite like PCC. It’s just so…awkward.
As you watch this keep in mind that it is the same institution from which I posted the draconian staff handbook a few days ago.
Nobody does advertising quite like PCC. It’s just so…awkward.
As you watch this keep in mind that it is the same institution from which I posted the draconian staff handbook a few days ago.
It’s time again for….E-mails From Fundies!
you talk about how were so judgmental, this website is the apitamy of judgmental. you think we are crazy because we believe that the bible is the inspired word of God which it is, and because we try to separate ourselves. the bible says we are a peculiar people. we are not crazy. we know what we believe is right, and that Christ wants us to follow him and do what he asks of us. no matter where that takes us, yes there are fundies as u like to call us who listen to there flesh instead of God we arnt perfect. no one is. maybe you should quit making fun
Yes, we arnt perfect either but the difference is that we’re enjoying it immensely. To quote a well-known doctor: “It is fun to have fun. But you have to know how.”
Edit: But just to show I hold no hard feelings and in the spirit of helping everyone be a little better, I’ve fixed the grammar and punctuation so they’ll be a more effective communicator next time. It’s the least I can do.
Imagine for a moment that you’re a fundamentalist pastor who has recently decided to make a big change in his ministry. Perhaps you’ve decided to add a bus ministry and a baptistry for children that’s shaped like a fire engine. Perhaps the move is even more drastic such as leaving your church to become a full-time evangelist or even something as far out as moving to the Midwest and starting your own end-times cult.
Whatever the case may be, you’re sure to insist that the only reason you’ve decided to make this move is that God Himself has told you that it should be done. Given that kind of authority for his choices, one wouldn’t think that a fundy pastor would care all that much whether or not the rank and file of people around him agreed with his decision or not. If God be for him, who can be against him? Why care what the unwashed masses think?
Yet, experience proves that not only must a fundamentalist pastor have God on his side but he will brook no disagreement from any mere mortal about his decisions as well. Even if he’s got one foot out the door of his ministry, voicing any apparent concern about the Man o’ Gawd’s decision to suddenly leave may well end you up called on the carpet by the new pastor to repent of your rebellion toward the old one. You can also expect haranguing phone calls from other members, anonymous notes of condemnation sent to your job or home, and possible removal from whatever ministries you happen to work in.
At any crossroads of decision the pastor knows that with God on his side, he’s in the majority — but he needs everyone else to agree with him anyway.
Next up, the urgent matter of Adam’s belly button…
StuffFundiesLike.com had a rare opportunity recently to sit down with reader CampMeetingGirl and get an insider view of her world. It was an experience like none other.
SFL: Tell us a little about yourself. Are you married or single? What’s your family like?
I am 24 years old and am single. I have never been married, although I am very open to the idea. I have never had a boyfriend although there was an evangelist who brought his son with him when he preached at our church who Ithought was cute.
My parents have been married for almost 25 years. They were hippies in Missouri when they met. God saved them out of a life of in their commune.My mother says that the best thing about it is that she had plenty of skirts and long enough hair when they joined Mount Carmel Baptist Church. We have been at that church ever since.
I have five brothers: Uriah, Jasper, Calvin (He was named when my father went through a brief phase of reading sermons by John Calvin until he was convicted of the predestination notions he was reading in the sermons. But, Calvin was born and named by that point and it couldn’t be undone. Father says he serves as a reminder of how subtle Satan can be.), John David, and Burl (my grandfather’s name).
We are all homeschooled. I graduated when I was 17 but am not going to college. Father says that the only reason a girl really goes to college is to find a husband or to become a single missionary or single school teacher. Since I have no desire to be single for the rest of my life, I am content to serve at home. Our church does not have a Christian school and we cannot go to Way of Life Independent Baptist Church’s school because they allow their girls to wear split skirts with tights underneath to school when it snows.
SFL: Where do you go to church and what role do you play in it?
Mount Carmel Baptist Church is a fundamentalist Baptist church. That means
we sing no hymns written before 1850 (that’s what the Presbyterians do) and
none written after 1968 (which is when drums started creeping into some
church’s music). Pastor Backlow is our Preacher. He founded the church and
gives us the Gospel Truth every time we’re in church. His wife and their
daughter, Annesley, are both pretty quiet.
I keep pretty busy at church. I play the piano every Sunday morning, Sunday
night, Wednesday night, Choir Practice, Children’s Choir Practice, Ladies’
Fellowships, and Funerals. My mother is in charge of the church kitchen so
we make a lot of green bean casseroles. Her secret is that she adds water
chestnuts. My father is the Head Usher and has been for 20 years. He makes
sure all the people put their children in the nursery and that no
Pentecostal visitor tries to raise their hands during the hymns or special
music.
We also all sing together. John David and Burl both sing tenor and Uriah
only mouths the words, but we get asked to sing at least once a month.
SFL: What do you consider to be the most important thing in the Christian
life?
The most important thing in the Christian life is to believe the Bible. So,
when the Bible says that staying as far away from the edge of the cliff as
possible is the right thing to do, then Christians should do it. I think
that Evangelist Tom Farrell said it right when he said, “One should not ask
how far can I go, but how far away can I stay.” That means that women’s
skirts should be ask long as they need to be.
SFL: What are your goals and dreams for the future?
I hope to get married and have 3 children in the next few years. I am able
to hang out with several people my age in the church’s gymnatorium on Friday
nights. We don’t get to talk much because the Single Director, Mr. Gallman
and his wife, keep us busy playing volleyball and Dutch Blitz. It is my
only chance to wear my denim culottes though. Unless I’m washing the car
with my brother, Jasper.
Uriah is 22 and just graduated from a conservative college. He is courting
a nice young lady from our church. They are saving their first kiss for the
wedding. But, they hold hands. That doesn’t make my father or mother
happy. But, her parents don’t have a problem with it. My mother says that
she’s the kind of girl who (when she and Uriah get married) will probably
let their daughter wear pants if she’s riding a horse. I hope she isn’t
that liberal.
The rest of the boys are either still in high school or at college. I don’t
get to see Jasper much. The college he is in doesn’t let him get off-campus
much. If he does go, he is running a bible club or witnessing outside the
local bar.
SFL: What are your thoughts on Stuff Fundies Like and its readers?
I find it nice to read posts that are so close to what I get to experience
in my life. It’s hard to find people who appreciate the true fundamentals
of the faith and have the intestinal fortitude (as Pastor Backlow says) to
make a stand for the faith. It almost seems like some of the readers do not
like Fundamentalism. But, then I realize that they are just being funny and
it makes me laugh.