38 thoughts on “Talking in Circles”

  1. Bodily exercise profits little…but when it comes to how we cover up the fat the KJV speaks volumes.

  2. Maybe someone should ask these pastors to comb through Seventeen for examples of what is and isn’t appropriate. A picture is worth a thousand words!

  3. “I perceive by your starch that you’re a man of the cloth!” Spurgeon

    In spite of the message on the wall behind him, this is what happens when someone ceases to preach Christ.

  4. Ring around the Bible
    Pocket full of verses
    East side West side
    We all fall down

    How about these guys go out and get a new sermon?

  5. His train of thought is a runaway. It was like he switched sermons three minutes in!

  6. Don’t dress like a hooker, don’t dress like royalty, a truly spiritual person wears hand-me-downs that are the wrong size and came from another fundie in the church or were bought from the local thrift store…

  7. These messages almost always seem to be directed towards the women in the congregation don’t they. IME, I’ve never heard a pastor tell men to dress modestly, mostly because fundy women NEVER have lustful thoughts {smo}

  8. @Darrell: I love it when you add your own commentary to videos. You really need to do more of those!

    @Phatchick: that was what stood out most to me, too. As for your second sentence, there are only two possible explanations for someone who actually thinks that women don’t have lustful thoughts: a) they’re a man or b) they’re in denial. I know *plenty* of women who openly lust over men’s bodies. Why do you think certain retailers print pictures of half-naked, very buff, men on their bags? ‘Nuff said.

  9. Sounds like a discussion I had with a fundie (QF/P) friend

    Drinking is not a sin….but causing someone to stumble is a sin…therefore drinking is a sin.

  10. Silly women, you’ll never win. Dress like a nun, you’re still a whore at heart. As stupid as these men sound, they’ve devised a brilliant system for themselves. Hats off to ya, Fundy Men!

  11. Telling women how they should dress is just a way of exerting control over them.

    It is funny how he goes from “the outside doesn’t matter” to “what you wear matters to God!”. Uh, no, it matters to you fundies.

  12. I will have to take a gander at this at work on Monday when I have a faster internet connection. If your dress/skirt is shorter the midcalf you are dressing like a hooker, if it is past the knees you are dressing like royalty. We will choose what is wrong on any given day. For the guys(sunday dress only) if you dress in anything less than a three breasted suit you are dressing cheaply, if you dress better than anything off the rack at sears you are trying to dress like royalty and show off, shame on you.

  13. Where in the Bible does it say that women are supposed to wear a little blush and be bashful?

    This talking in circles reminds of a sermon by Bob Wood at BJ where he gave a great explanation of Christian Liberty while going through Romans, but then proceeded to tell us all the stuff like music, dress, movies, etc that the scripture didn’t apply to. I was just sitting there dumbfounded wondering if anyone else was having a problem with it. Then I noticed almost the whole rest of my row including my row monitor was sleeping. 🙂

  14. @ Kevin- hahaha good ole Dr. Wood…. I think he’s gone senile. When I attended BJ, He was talking about David and somehow it got twisted into “all good Christians need to go to a good fundamental Christian school like BJU.” I personally don’t think he knows what he’s talking about at all. I blame Dementia.

  15. As I was watching this edifying material, a bit of nostalgia upwelled inside me that I covered with a piece of toilet paper, that hangs from my fundamentalist altar call belt I wore this morning. The Fundamentalist Altar Call Belt is equipped with toilet tissue, a mini new testament, tithe/love offering envelopes and a 3 by 5 card that has the 1-2-3 pray after me prayer clearly written on it so that I can lead the sinner to the appropriate canned words necessary to do the trick, lest I am overcome with emotion during the 12th verse of “Just As I Am” with an “Is Your All on the Altar” change up.

    I also took a gander at my knees to make sure they were appropriately covered. They were, but with pants. I have no idea what to do now. I’m totally confused.

  16. Guys, if Dr. Wood had dementia, it started in 1977 when I was there. He’s one weird dude.

  17. This is from Stuff Fundies Like. Dress like Royalty your wrong, dress like a hooker your defiantly wrong. Guess we should all go to church naked. :/ Where did that thought come from, I don’t know, could it be because in one message he has made it wrong for women to wear anything from dress clothes, to what he would call “harlot clothes” which may be different definition to what everyone else calls harlot clothes. He even complained about Rouge? What century is he in? No one wears Rouge in this century!

  18. I love how you ended the commentary….”I give up” That made my morning.

    Yea that is one of the problems I see with Fundamentalism. On the one hand salvation is not by works. So it is all an inner decision. In fact you are so wicked you can’t help but sin. Your body is the spawn of the devil himself. You do nothing good. Your body is to be distrusted. Then on the other hand suddenly all of sanctification is by works. Which is all outside. The outside is now what matters. You must trust in your body to destroy the evil. That double standard runs deep. So when he switches back and forth and on the one hand talks about the inside is all that matters and then switches without pause to why externals matter and back again it seems like a non or sequitur, but in his mind that is exactly the way things are. So I don’t think he is just confused or got off track. I think he meant every word of it and sees absolutely no apparent contradiction in anything he said. “That’s just the Bible my friends.” As I could see him say.

  19. flim flammery of the highest order. Having sat through this for many years as a kid and teen, I was sophisticated enough to know that the congregation is being put into a trance with his voice osculations and synchopating movements around the pulpit. The circular logic is deliberate. They are getting dizzy. He has them. He himself is in a trans, it involves his love for the sound of his own voice. Vaudvillian.

  20. @Nate,

    When someone at BJU retires it is so *that* they can preach. Dr. Wood probably decided that should be his calling.

    I remember back at BJU when I was in grad school Dr. Wood preached a sermon that was pretty damn close to heresy. I forget the exact topic, but I believe he was talking about the different kind of loves and kept tying eros back to David and Jonathan (If memory serves…if it wasn’t that it was something quite close). It would be a slip of the tongue if you said it once, but he said eros several times in the linking. Yea that got everyone talking…Was anyone else around for that sermon?

  21. maybe said “I was sophisticated enough to know that the congregation is being put into a trance with his voice osculations and synchopating movements around the pulpit”

    That’s EXACTLY it. It’s all about stirring emotion, especially guilt.

  22. ‘There are three things that matter in property: location, location, location.’
    There are three things that matter in preaching: integrity, integrity, integrity.

  23. @Mark Rosedale: I think I was around at that time but must have missed the sermon myself. But I do recall many, many Dr. Wood impersonations that included the phrase, “Peter, eros thou me?”

  24. @Jordan….That was it. It was Peter Lovest thou me that he was talking about and he used Eros in place of Love…Oh my yes…that is it. Thanks Jordan.

  25. You guys have heard the “they broke Jesus’ legs” Dr. Wood story, right? One of the more interesting days I’ve had at the Bob.

  26. Ok. I’ve never caught this before, but why do they look at notes?? Usually they’re away from them and go on some rant anyways. I guess I never caught onto that before. Making notes on a rant? Hmm…I wonder if Don has some knowledge on that… 🙂

  27. So if the woman is anything other than a doormat, she is sinning? At least that’s the way I hear it.

    As for remembering sermons from the Bob, in all of my 4 years there, I can only remember 1. Seriously. Jr was at the pulpit (I wasn’t sure preaching was the correct word). I have no idea what the topic was but he told us how shrimp were the dirtiest of everything in the ocean. They could even be found in the eye sockets of the dead people at the bottom. I didn’t eat shrimp before and I definitely didn’t eat shrimp after that. That’s all I remember from chapels there. And I didn’t even sleep during chapel.

    1. I love shrimp, but I’ll have to think about that one.
      Wonder if that’s why they’re non-kosher.

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