84 thoughts on “Fundy Tweet of the Week: Just Desserts”

    1. BJg, are you joking or would you be planning on a lunch that you would enjoy, but “Dr.” Fugate not so much?

      Another thing, you just won a butt cushion and now you win again? What’s going on here?

      1. My winning of the butt cushion, like many significant events, was foreordained before the foundation of the world. Predestined, if you will.

        As far as my desire to have lunch with Dr. Steppincrap, I would have to take a pass on it. The majesty, the grandeur, would simply overwhelm me.

    1. Probably their own lunch and 10% of the pastor’s. (Tip can be left in the form of a gospel tract)

    1. Shouldn’t a “Cabin Fever Sunday” event be something intended to relieve cabin fever, rather than cause it?

  1. Well if that doesn’t fan the flames of arrogance for a MOG/emperor/self-annointed deity then nothing will!!

    Only one way this could get better….if Preacher will autograph the Bibles of the winners!!!!

  2. When did having lunch with the pastor become a door prize?
    My grandma use to have her Methodist preacher and his wife over for lunch or dinner now and again. But she didn’t feel it was like she won the lottery. Its simply fellowship.
    Part of me feels this is so arrogant that a pastor would expect his presence to be considered a reward for his parishioners.

    Part of me wonders what this says about their view of God?
    I mean I just don’t see Jesus having contests like this–the Disciple who brings the most visitors to the Sermon on the Mount will sit at my right hand. The most people brought to the Resurrection will have breakfast on the beach with the Risen Lord.

    1. My grandfather was a Baptist minister and he reminds me of the Methodist pastor in your above comment. He would had been absolutely appalled at the behavior of “pastors” these days.

    2. I can see how this would happen in a large church. The mog is already so far above the sheeple, and there are so many sheeple, that he doesn’t/can’t spend time with them all. If he’s not personal friends with you you’d probably never interact with him outside of church socials and such. So lunch would be a once-in-a-lifetime type event.

      I love my much smaller current church. The pastor is much more approachable. Also he doesn’t act like he’s better than everyone else, so that helps too.

      1. I’m in a very large church, and if you don’t know the pastor by first name or he doesn’t recognize you, then you must be working hard to avoid him.

        Its not a church size thing, its a pastor’s ego size thing.

        1. As a teenager, I was member of what is now called a megachurch (about 9000 members), and the head pastor knew the name and face of almost everyone in the church, including me (although I had no special significance for him). That’s above average, but still, most pastors strive to come as close as they can to knowing every member and almost every repeat visitor.

        2. I’m not talking about recognizing a name or face though, I mean actually being friends. I knew my old pastor, but definitely wasn’t on a friendly, chatty basis.

      2. It’s not possible to be a personal friend of the mog he has to keep some offishness in all relationships:roll:

    3. It became a door prize when the MOG was elevated like the CEO of a company who is “too busy” to get to know the “little people” that make his company work.

      There’s really no excuse for it, but it is common these days… another “blight” thanks to followers of Hyles.

      1. Wonder if there would ever be a show on TV called “Undercover Church” This is where the MOG goes and is the peon at the mega church. He is the one cleaning the toilets and listening to the tripe preached from the pulpit. I wonder if he would have a different perspective on things, if he would humble himself and become a servant.

        1. yikes. That would be interesting if the pastor was humble enough to take criticism. But as we have seen on this blog, there are those pastors who would simply use those private talks as sermon fodder.

  3. Very unclear. The first 10 who bring the most visitors get lunch with the preacher.

    Assuming each of the ten brings two visitors, this adds up to 30 people.

    Um, is that in the regular pot-luck lunch in the parish hall, and the lucky ones get to sit at the same table? Most round or oblong tables have spaces for 8 or 10 persons, so 3-5 tables would be needed. The preacher would, I assume, move from table to table to spread his glory around.

    Or if they’re all going out to lunch the same situation applies and there’s a tab of $400-500 there–even at a place like Golden Corral or Ryan’s,, favored by fundies in the South. I seriously doubt that the church or the pastor is going to fork over that amount.

    1. I doubt the visitors come too. Lunch with mog is at a later date.

      And yes he’ll probably pay for it….with your tithe money =D

    2. Just read the small-print: never mind lol Visitors come too, probably at a buffet, but your tithe money still pays for it.

    3. I assume the visitors don’t come to the dinner – it’s later.

      What I find interesting is that they have this “wonderful” “prize” to entice members to bring visitors, but don’t appear to offer anything for members to bait their hooks with. How are they supposed to convince visitors to come? “Please come hear the best preacher in America?! If you do, I’ll get to eat lunch with him! Won’t that be great! … No, of course you wouldn’t come to the lunch you’d help me win – you’re not a member of our church! But if you become a member, you can compete with me next year for the same prize!”

      Might make it less awkward if they could keep the contest on the hush-hush, but twitter and the inevitable fact the visitors will be counted and winner announced in the service kinda blows that plan 🙄

  4. Well, he’s a celebrity – who wouldn’t want to have lunch with him? I went to a bus conference at Clays Mill – in the auditorium on the “stage” they had huge wing-backed chairs and men sitting in them for the whole service (Deacons I presume). Of course there were no women in those chairs.

    1. They always do that at FBC Hammond, behind Hyles, Schaap, and (I assume) whoever replaced Schaap.

      When I first saw it, I thought it was the old “mourner’s bench,” for repentant sinners doing penance.

  5. According to Wikipedia: “Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a personality disorder in which a person is excessively preoccupied with personal adequacy, power, prestige and vanity. This condition affects one percent of the population.”

    I would venture to guess that it affects 100% of IFB pastors or is at least a prerequisite for the job.

  6. If Doctor Fuggit really wants to save some visiting souls he should invest in real prizes: 50″ flat screen TV, or an iPad, or a year’s exemption from nursery duty (that one’s just for the ladies!), or a $500 Walmart gift card, or a Remington pump shotgun, things like this. I mean, really, is a visiting soul on their way to a devil’s literal hell only worth lunch with the pastor? Raise the stakes, Doctor Fuggit! I ain’t bringing no one unless I get a shot at a real prize!

  7. Oh, and maybe the theme isn’t the best choice either. I have a mental image of a bunch of half-crazed, wild-eyed, muttering hillbillies all in one place. Yeeeeehaaaw!

      1. That’s for sure! Actually, now that I think about it, my comment could be taken as a description of the regulars at my favorite bar.

      1. how about seven layer salad (the one with peas and bacon) and a nice orange jello with shredded carrots?

  8. Honestly even whenI was knee deep in fundy land. I never understood the seeming obsession with stuff like this. The MOG is just a man after…maybe thats why Inever made the best fundy?

    1. I know what you’re talking about, I often thought that, too. That’s also why I never could figure out why they put the mog on such pedestal to the point where the people who voted the guy in, in the first place, can’t vote his sorry butt out when he was caught doing something illegal/immoral.

  9. I’m not really sure which I find more disturbing: the fact that they’re even offering this sort of “door prize” or that in their poor benighted little brains, there’s not a thing in the world weird about it, nor is there anything offensive about the implications.

  10. Do the visitors get to have lunch too?

    Our pastor and his wife have all the new members over to their house for dinner.

    1. Uh, unless your pastor is using the Jeffery Dahmer cookbook, he’s having them TO dinner, TO dinner. Having them FOR dinner… let’s just say he’s going to have a lot of ‘splainin to do.
      This was really beaten into my little head full of mush way back when, so it’s an automatic reflex on my part.

  11. His name is really ‘Fugate’?

    I’m not going to ask how to pronounce that. Any way I try, it comes out vulgar.

  12. You can earn lunch with a man who is presumptious enough to call himself Dr. yet never went to college. What a prize!! Did I mention he runs a christian school and a college?:D

    1. “In 1997, Bro. Fugate was honored with two honorary doctorate degrees: a Doctorate of Divinity from Oklahoma Baptist College and a Doctor of Humanities from Hyles-Anderson College.”

      From their website. ‘Nuff said.

        1. BG, I think John R. Rice’s horse was awarded an honorary Doctor of Horse Sense. From what I read, the awards ceremony for the horse took the old man completely by surprise, and he was none too amused.

          Your previous comment referring to “Dr.” nee Fuggedaboudit is appropriate since receiving an honorary “doctorate” seems to have evolved into the fundy Mog equivalent of being made.

          A question we might ask is whether those “doctors” who were so honored by Hyles-Anderson “College” and who would now dare say anything unfavorable about Il Capo di Tutti Capi, must stop referring to themselves as “Doctor.”

        2. BG,

          We could also ask what type of honorary degree would be awarded to a donkey.

          Joking aside, maybe in the past, people might have been impressed by someone whose achievements were recognized with an award of an honorary doctorate from some prestigious university. Even then, it’s likely that recipients of such degrees would have had the good sense not to refer to themselves as doctor.
          Seriously, is there anyone who is genuinely impressed by an honorary doctorate given by places like HA”C?” Furthermore, how is it possible that the men receiving these “degrees” are unaware of how comical they appear when they refer (or allow others to refer) to themselves by the honorific title, “Doctor?”

    1. Well, sign me up!

      I notice you can box for the basic registration fee, but laser tag costs extra. 🙄

      Is “Dr.” Fugate really going to let anyone who wants take a swing at him?

  13. It’s not about Numbers. It’s about Numbers.

    The ministry is not about Numbers, it is about the Number of Souls we are reaching for Christ w the Gospel.— Pastor Jeff Fugate (@drjefffugate) February 25, 2014

  14. Unless the Preacher (what’s with the capital P?) is going to play piano or make his famous bananas Foster for his guests, why should I care? Is just basking in his presence supposed to be the prize? Seriously?

    1. Take a cruise they said, see the world they said, now we’re stuck on the front if this stupid ship!

      It could be worse, we could be stuck in the audience!

      -Stadler and Waldorf.

      Best Muppet Movie ever! I like Muppet Christmas Carol too.

  15. Hmmm. Let’s see. Dinner with the Pastor.

    OR, I could have a root canal.

    At this point, the root canal would be less painful!

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