Hyles Anderson, king james version Pastors Who Put Their Names On Stuff September 13, 2013 Darrell 224 Comments Not content to merely sign the flyleaf of the Bible, Jack Hyles went one step further and actually put his name on the cover.
224 thoughts on “Pastors Who Put Their Names On Stuff”
That’s for the JHV only crowd… those guys are crazy.
“JHV only crowd”
^^ +10 ^^
Thanks Big Gary, I was pretty depressed after getting squeezed out of the first post. I guess I will get dressed today and face the world.
V implies it’s just a version, I prefer to call it the JHB since if Jack Hyles is authoring/authorizing, it is the Bible for the entire world, not just the English Speaking. Even if it’s the same KJV translation, JHB is superior than KJB. 🙂
You are hard core.
“And if you were not saved-AH by the Word of God-AH in this Bible, then you, sir, were not saved-AH.”
*snarkle, gack, hack, cough, gag*
I’ve also wondered about those life sized portraits of the Pastor and his wife being the first thing you see when you enter the church….why?
Yup. An oversized portrait was proudly on display in our former church’s foyer…just to subtly make it clear exactly whose church it is.
Church I grew up in had all the former pastors’ portraits prominently displayed in the foyer and the current pastor had them removed to another location because he thought they were tacky.
But did he leave his own up? 😀
Yup, mine too! I avoided the front foyer whenever possible.
Well, it sure isn’t God’s…
**cough** The same reason many Catholic churches make a statue of Mary and/or pictures of various “saints” the first thing you see when entering their buildings…IDOLATRY…**cough**
Most Catholic churches don’t do anything of the sort.
Thank you Deacons Son
Oh, no you don’t. The idolatry of the Catholic church is obvious and shameless. Statues of Mary, Jesus, and “saints” abound at shrines, cathedrals, and other Catholic buildings. Praying to Mary and “saints”, especially in front of their statues occur often. The recognition of such things is found clearly in their Catechism. No, you do not get to think you got away with that lie.
Exodus 20:1-5: I am the LORD thy God, which have brought thee out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage. Thou shalt have no other gods before me. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth: Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;
Luke 11:27-28: And it came to pass, as he spake these things, a certain woman of the company lifted up her voice, and said unto him, Blessed is the womb that bare thee, and the paps which thou hast sucked. But he said, Yea rather, blessed are they that hear the word of God, and keep it.
You, sir or madam, have serious issues dealing with reality. Grow up.
Looking to Jesus,
Having read your comments, I see a tendency in you that I see in many fundamentalists. Namely, instead of extending love and respect to Catholics and accepting what they say about their own theology, you assert that what YOU think their teachings mean is what they actually mean.
It would be like if you had me over to your house and cooked a dish with mushrooms and I looked at you and said, “Mushrooms are poisonous!! You are trying to kill me!!” I think you would be taken aback and offended that as soon as I saw mushrooms on the table, I assumed they were poisonous.
But you are doing the same thing with Catholic theology. You see teachings and ideas in their theology that, interpreted one way, might be dangerous and unbiblical, and you say, “well, that must be what those teachings mean and therefore their teachings are evil and will send people to hell.” You should consider that your assumptions about Catholic teaching may be wrong and that their theology may be much more innocuous and even Scriptural than you presently believe.
That is not to say that you must agree with them on everything. But part of coming out of fundamentalism is coming to the realization that even though there may be one “right answer” to every theological question, we may not know what that “right answer” is in this lifetime. That is why the Apostle Paul said “now we see through a glass darkly.” That is why Jesus said He would send the Holy Spirit to guide us into all truth.
Someday we may have all the answers. But that is not the case now. In the meantime, I urge you to try to respond to the different theological beliefs of fellow believers in Christ with more humility, compassion, and respect.
I went to a Roman Catholic Church once, to attend the wedding of some family friends, and it was jam packed with statues of biblical characters, stained glass windows with portraits of white guys in beards lined the walls on either side, several statues of Mary.
I was struck by how little Jesus was represented, aside from one tiny painting thing on the wall, and the figure on a crucfix.
Every thing else, the art, the sculptures and paintings, etc, wasof Mary, or bearded, robed guys.
Oh, try it without the passive aggressive stuff, okay?
Ask any Catholic who posts here what those pictures are for. You can cherish a belief that their stated answers aren’t the real answers and that they are secretly or unconsciously doing what you have decided they are doing. Or you can choose to have a conversation.
I don’t know enough about the Catholic faith to really comment on the allegation of idolatry, however, a lot of non-Catholic Christians, in fact most of us, have problems with idolatry. I don’t have any statues in my house, but often I put my family and my friends ahead of Jesus. Often when I am at church to worship, I am thinking about other things Idolatry is anything we put above God and I think most of us, if not all, are guilty of it.
Because, you know, Mary and the saints are totally the same as Jack Hyles or other fundy preachers…
Hate to tell you this (well, no, I actually *don’t*), but such accusations of idolatry is pretty much just slander.
In fact, I suggest you simply ignore and discount everything your Baptist church, especially a fundy one, has ever told you about Catholicism — or any other denomination or religion.
And stay away from those Jack Chick pamphlets, would you?
A very important distinction between fundamentalist protestantism (including Baptists) and Catholics (I include Anglican, Episcopal, etc.) is that protestantism emphasizes personal relationships with God to the exclusion of everything else. It is just you and God. Well, except that the Pastor has to be honored above everything else. The Pastor is the mediator, after all….
Catholicism in its various forms emphasizes community. We are a part of the Church, and stand before the Lord together. We also believe in the Communion of Saints. We as a body, both physical and before the Lord are still one body.
If I ask my deceased grandfather to pray for me, it is an acknowledgement that he is not “dead,” but is alive in God, able to pray on my behalf as well.
Mind you, there are people and cultures who carry things too far. But that doesn’t undo the unity of the Body. Nor is it making anyone but Christ the Savior.
Baptists do love to show their cultural and spiritual ignorance and call it gospel.
How about I read your Catechism, which teaches exactly what your faith teaches? It clearly teaches that the Pope is seen as divinity, Mary and “saints” can be prayed to, that Purgatory is real, and that sacraments are necessary for salvation. I care not for the emphasis on community, if lies are sending that community to Hell. I have done my homework, thanks.
BTW, the Bible teaches that Jesus is the Way, Truth, and Life: no man comes to the Father but by Him. Salvation is not of works of righteousness, which we have done, but according to His mercy He saves us. There are no religious or good things we can do for salvation. We cannot pay God off to wink at our sin! We are saved by believing in Christ alone, just like Abraham (Rom. 4), Paul (Acts 9), and many, many others.
Whoa the negative vibes, man! (or woman) (whatever)
First, I doubt you have ever read the Catholic catechism. It is rather extensive. And the way you sling stuff around, it is like you have looked at some terms but have no idea what they mean.
It rather reminds me of the errors creationists make when they talk about science, and evolution in particular. They think they know, and they don’t. They are worse than ignorant.
I happen to be Episcopalian. Have you read our catechism? I know the lies told about us, too. And lots of people aren’t convinced because somehow they have this unfounded certitude stuck in their mind.
You would do well to be a bit more gracious. There will be lots of people in heaven you wouldn’t have let in. And yes, they will probably be surprised you made it, too.
I dare say that every one of us has significant “errors” in our theological understanding. Every one of us. Do you think God only accepts those who have perfect understanding? He accepts little children, after all, and they understand next to nothing except the difference between love and abuse.
Ignorance can be cured, if there is a willing heart. Arrogance, not so much.
Just FYI for the hyle’s worshipers, HBGS taught catechisms for about two of the three years that I went there….things jack and the pack hope that people forget.
Rtgmath, I recently contacted a local Episcopal church about visiting services in the near future. It is precisely that attitude of community with the ENTIRE body of Christ which drew my interest in the first place. <3
rtgmath, that isn’t quite true.
Debating Roman Catholics is also like debating Calvinists – no matter how fairly and accurately you depict their views, they will say “you don’t understand our beliefs” or “you are misrepresenting us/our beliefs/ our group.”
How convenient for both groups you can never really pin down what they believe, so you can’t debate them, you can’t take the fight to them, they always force you on the defense (defend your own beliefs – which gets tiring if that is one-sided).
When you ask RCs or Calvinists for books that explain their respective views to their satisfaction, *crickets*
In online disgareements, even when quoting from their official documents or esteemed theologians (in the case of Calvinsits), they will always claim “he does not speak for us” or whatever.
It’s like trying to nail Jello to the wall. And it’s one reason I seldom debate RCs or Calvinists, as it’s an exercise in futility and a big time waster.
I went through a phase several years ago where I was very interested in Roman Catholicism, so I not only read stacks of books by Baptists (and I don’t mean IFBs) and Protestant critics of RCism (and I don’t mean shoddy scholarship or cheap tactics a la Chick Tracts), but also books by guys who are former RCs (they were life long RCs).
I also read back and forth formal debates between Protestant apologists and RC apologists.
I visited and read pro-RC blogs/forums by RCs, to learn about their beliefs from the horse’s mouth.
As much as I am not a fan of IFBism, even a broken clock is right on occasion, and some of their disagreement with RCism is warranted, and based on reality, not misunderstanding, narrow mindedness, superstition, etc.
The understanding in the Catholic Church of saints is similar to the icons in Orthodoxy. They are “windows” into the heavenly realm where we see the saints of before who have been faithful to the end and reached their heavenly reward. And for a Catholic or an Orthodox Christian to focus on the saint or icon–they are not worshiping but praying that they too will be faithful. And like Paul says for us to imitate him as he followed Christ, focusing on the icon or saint is seeking to imitate that saint.
Looking back on Fundy days vs now where I am studying Orthodoxy/ church history, I find it interesting how the Fundies almost disdain Mary and the Saints. It’s as if the events described in Acts were the only things happening in the Church. WRONG.
Acts is the story of the gospel going from Jerusalem to Rome – mainly through Peter and then Paul. But it was going elsewhere via the other 11 disciples and other early church leaders.
As much as Fundamentalism is obsessed with historical accuracy, I’d think they would want to seriously investigate those real-life people that much of the Church regards as Saints.
They were real. As real as Jesus is real.
They were also good people. No, great people. Holy people that we can learn from. They took the gospel seriously. Oh, and they are alive. As alive as you and me. God is the God of the living.
And everything is about Jesus. Mary and all the other Saints unashamedly point to Jesus – in words and actions – probably a lot more than your average mog.
Better than life sized portraits of Jesus Christ, I guess.
This only piles onto the mountain of proof that Hyles types are simply leaders in the religion of worshiping idols.
Hyles desires black background websites with white font webmasters around the world to unite in this campaign. I can’t see it happening though, unless there is room on the inside for notes. Or at least an autograph page.
It surprises me that it’s just the New Testament. There is so much more to manipulate your sheep in the rest of the scriptures.
Yeah, but the OT is easier for the thinking person to discount in terms of the validity of its application personally or corporately. The NT has a lot of coherent truth, so the mogs must practice at seriously twisting passages until they become expert in the craft. Hell, if all they had was one of the gospels, they would not lose an inch of control.
At least from what I’ve seen of their sermons on SFL, IFB pastors hardly ever preach from the New Testament. All the Smiting and Abominations and tithes of cumin and mint in the Old Testment are for them.
There is that passage where Jesus told the Pharisees they were right to tithe on their mint and cumin. That’s a Fundy tithing classic text. I won a piece of candy once for being the first in the *young adult/college age* Sunday School class to find the reference. Is it any wonder I loathe going to adult Sunday School?
I shouldn’t be surprised, but somehow I am. 😕
It doesn’t say that it is King James!! 😯
It is clearly King Jack’s though
Is King J close enough??
Why can’t it be that they just did this because it was a pew bible?
It may have been a pew Bible. But you can rest assured, sitting in that pew, one would only hear the Gospel According to Jack preached.
Lots of churches have pew Bibles, but I’ve never seen one that put the pastor’s name on the pew Bibles.
If Jack Schaap’s name was on the current pew Bibles, that would be a pricey fix. Exacto knife and scotch tape?
The Lord gave us Sharpies, hay-men?
Well for one it is only the New Testament. A pew Bible would need the OT also so the pastor can preach against homosexuality and the sins of Sodom and obedience to parents, and hatred of all the wicked, etc.
I would also add that New Testaments are what many Baptists hand out in soul winning–Salvation is found in the NT. And therefore, as they pass this out–you have the church and God’s acceptable messenger printed on the Bible so they know where to find the truth.
I was going to say the same – this looks like something they were handing out for free. Printing just the NT is obviously much cheaper than the whole Bible.
In reference to the possibility of it being a pew Bible…um no they were not. I was there when these were handed out. The church did not have pew Bibles the entire time I went there, and that was about 12 or 13 years. I had one of them. My mom still has the bicentennial family Bible…what a treat.
The bicentennial of what?
Surely FBCH is less than 200 years old, and the Bible is much more than 200 years old.
1976. They had bicentennial things everywhere….including FBCH. It was the year my mom started getting sucked into the cult. Two years later she had me begging my catholic father to let me go to HB. If only I could take that moment in time back….. 😕
I’m thinking that means Jack Hyles published this or a similar Bible in 1976…
It was probably a spring or fall program thing, I can’t recall exactly when we received those. Anyone remember when hyles was giving out trips for one of the programs and the prize was a trip to the Holy Land or Texas where jacky boy grew up? The fool that won chose the trip to hyles-land and actually received a standing ovation for making that choice. I remember being completely baffled by that.
The Bible looked like this, although I thought it was a royal blue. I will snoop around my mom’s next time I go up there. She has lots of hyles books. Thankfully she didn’t beat us like his books recommend.
Oops-here is the link. http://www.ebay.com/itm/HOLY-BIBLE-PTL-CLUB-LIMITED-EDITION-KING-JAMES-VERSION-COMMEMORATIVE-EDITION-/171123641088
I would ask what in blazes the bicentennial of the Declaration of Independence has to do with the King James Bible, but, alas, I can imagine the blather that went with that commemorative edition.
What blesses my heart, Darrell, is that this looks like it is a WELL-WORN Bible. Hay-men to that!!
So is he the author, or just the editor?
Can you imagine what the New Testament would say if Jack Hyles did write it? 😯
Yeah, me too. 😥
The Hyles Bible would be written at an eighth grade level and include pictures.
Mostly pictures of Hyles.
Perhaps an addendum with pictures David took?
Watch the sermon “Jesus The Author” by Al Lacy. Lacy says Jesus wrote the entire Bible and was with Moses when he wrote Genesis etc.
Lacy was the biggest KJVO nut out there. Whenever he came to Pastors School that’s all he talked about and how Jesus and the Disciples were “Baptists”
Jimmy Swaggart’s signature edition expositior’s Bible sells for $100, whereas the non-sig versions sell for much less. Also, “his” comments are in red letters. 🙄
Was that the Bible in the motel room where Jimmy Lee was caught Swaggarting with a prostitute?
Paul Crouch sells for over $500. All televangelists worship him. He even offered Hyles the chance to appear on the PTL program in the mid-80’s but Hyles shot down Crouch at Pastors School the following year claiming he was going to get TBN and the PTL Club taken off the air.
Why to fundies tolerate reference bibles? By adding notes and references that are someone’s option, that person is adding to the bible. And I thought people who added to the bible got cursed, instead many become quiet wealthy.
If god had meant there to be a reference bible, she would inserted the references herself, or at least inspired Queen James to add them in 1611.
I actually was reading an argument on another page over the KJV and ESV. One participant stated if someone wanted a study Bible ESV translation all they needed was the KJV–its the reference for all other Bibles…
If they are truly KJV only–they do not need references. YIkes.
I’ve known people who taught that the margin notes should not be there. They will tell you to get an unannotated KJV. That’s all you need.
I always wondered if all they needed was the words of the KJV, why they had preaching, since it “adds” to the words.
Now all you need is J. Pervert Schaap’s polished shaft and the Museum of Fundamentalism will be complete!
I assume the entrance fee for the museum will be 10% of my gross income?
Darrell’s like a mohel: He doesn’t charge fees; he just takes tips.
(If you get that old joke, you’re probably not a Fundy.)
I thought you lived in Texas BG? Are you also a resident of the Borscht Belt?
The kingdom of Borscht is within me.
Oy. And on Yom Kippur he whips this one out.
Wouldn’t it be something to have Jack S.’s actual polished shaft from that performance?
I’d want the polishing rag, (to complete the set), except that it’s probably all sticky.
Schaap polished the shaft only in the Youth Conference. He did every year just about which I didn’t realize until I saw the video from 2004 Youth Conference where looks like Elmer Fudd. Maybe when he gets out he can autograph an 8×10 of him polishing the shaft.
Who wants a picture when you can have the actual arrow?
He could autograph arrows. $30 apiece with free shipping from Bass Pro Shops.
When Hyles gets out of jail he’ll become Charismatic and he’ll be giving his testimony on TBN and appearing next to Paul Crouch on Praise A Thon!!
Hyles? jail? I think you have the wrong name.
DtP meant Schaap, of course.
Where Jack Hyles is now, I don’t think he’ll be getting out of.
Darrell, please, please, please open an actual, physical Museum of Fundamentalism. The library alone would be amazing.
And the gift shop … !
I would love that. I have been searching everywhere for a Jack Hyles commemorative shot glass.
Trying to stop drinking, are you, Apa?
Seeing JH’s face would encourage drinking, would it not?
Hyles himself said Fuller Seminary will make you drink. I’m guessing Hyles really hated Fuller Seminary
I could def see myself making a trip to that museum. IDK if I could handle the POE version @ Crown College.
Hyles even wanted to have a church in downtown Chicago as big as on of the skyscrapers.
Kind of like Oral Roberts’ memorial to himself?
Ironic how Oral Roberts was one of Jack Hyles targets yet Hyles lived the same lifestyle while looking good in his dark sunglasses.
Speaking of the 900-foot Jesus:
THAT was Hammond’s First Baptist Church?! It looks more like the First Baptist Warehouse–although I see from Google that the current incarnation has a steeple and a bit of church-like facade. Now it looks like a warehouse with a steeple. How did this miss the roster of ugly churches we saw a while back?
Re: pastor’s name on the Bible. “Jack Hyles is my shepherd; I shall not want. . .”
The building has been renovated more than once. Plus they have new parking lots/gymnasium/Sunday School rooms etc. The Auditorium is three times the size it was when Hyles “preached”. When Schaap took over, they added video screens, padded pews on the platform, new pianos, larger baptistry etc.
I have had this idea for awhile of trying to introduce the idea to fundies that steeples are evil because the Bible condemns building a “tower that reaches to the heavens.” I wonder how hard it would be to get a church to have a “steeple smashing.”
Plus FBC Boasts of having more bathrooms than the Whitehouse. Plus Fellowship Hall/Cafateria is larger than it was during Hyles time. You have to hand it to Schaap, he was a visionary and expanded FBCH
“Plus FBC Boasts of having more bathrooms than the Whitehouse.”
Of course it does. People don’t have to puke as often at the White House.
(The truth is, buildings constructed in 1800 tended not to have a lot of indoor plumbing.)
I almost choked on my food from laughing so hard when Hutson was preaching at FBCH and said “I love the big toilet stalls you folks have here. Where I come from we don’t have but one toilet in the whole building, say Hay Men”.
More bathrooms than the White House?
Why does that even matter?
I completely fail to see the relevance of that fact. In all probability, the Mall of America has more bathrooms than the White House too.
So do most federal penitentiaries, eh, Schaap?
Image if Hyles’ bible had “Doctor” Scofield notes. It be a fundie’s wet dream.
Somebody’s standing alone on the Word of God… 👿
As long as you stand on the book, your sheep can’t open it to see what it really says.
It looks like the owner of this blasphemus site has run out of things to criticize about Christians. Anyone can clearly see that this photo has been manipulated with the words below New Testament inserted with a computer program.
For shame, manufacturing something like this in Paint for cheap laughs and internet traffic.
God is not mocked, you will reap your reward for this and the other lies that you tell about great men of God.
So, by your comment, you ADMIT that if Jack Hyles did print a Bible like this, that there would be something wrong with that. Well, guess what? Jack Hyles DID print this Bible with his name on it.
I am calling Poe on this PaulnFern. The post is way too coherent for a fundy.
Yup. Honestly, we’ve had better Poes than this.
All the correct spelling and punctuation is pretty much a giveaway.
Not completely correct. Blasphemus is not a correct spelling of which I am aware.
Whoops, you’re right. A few commas and semicolons are missing, too. But it’s still suspiciously literate for a Fundy comment.
Perhaps a fundy who went to a good public school instead of a Christian school?
Can someone please explain what a “Poe” is. Seen it referred to, but have no clue as to the meaning? ❓ ❓
Here is the history and explanation of Poe’s Law:
Poe’s Law was originally formulated by Nathan Poe in August 2005. The law emerged at the Creation & Evolution forum on the website Christianforums.com. Like most such places, it had seen a large number of creationist parody postings. These were usually followed by at least one user starting a flame war (a series of angry and offensive personal attacks) thinking it was a serious post and taking it at face value. Nathan Poe summarized this pattern in his original formulation of the law:
“”Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is utterly impossible to parody a Creationist in such a way that someone won’t mistake it for the genuine article.
The law caught on and has since slowly leaked out as an Internet meme. Over time it has been extended to include not just creationist parody but any parody of extreme ideology, whether religious, secular, or totally bonkers.
Full disclousure – I just copied and pasted the above.
Poe’s Law says it is almost impossible to tell a parody of religious extremism from a real expression of religious extremism.
A corollary says it is almost impossible to tell a skillful troll from a real crazy person.
On “Stuff Fundies Like,” “Poe” as a singular nound usually means someone who is pretending to be an unhinged fanatic for comic effect, or to get a rise out of other commenters, or for some other facetious purpose.
Nope, definitely not photoshopped. Anyone can zoom in and see that the wear, fading, and damage continue from background/image through the lettering (ie: crease from the background runs through the “R” in “Pastor”).
POE!!! But, nice try.
I’m surprised Hyles didn’t release his own school curriculum ans call it Hyles-Curriculum etc.
I am not surprised that no one refutes my charge of picture falsification. Instead you make fun of me and my spelling and punctuation.
I am trying to type this on my phone and sometimes I make mistakes. Anyone who has ever done that knows that it is sometimes easier to just leave the mistakes than to go back and try to correct them. Often, when trying to correct, I erase the whole message and have to start again so sometimes I don’t bother.
As far as my education goes, I did not attend a state school. My parents did the right thing and home-schooled my siblings and I.
It is not right what you are doing to Jack Hyle’s memory. He was a great man who affected a lot of people’s lives for good. It is despicable that you lot of malcontents have taken it upon yourselves to tear down his reputation after he is dead and can no longer defend himself.
Have you no sense of honor?
The more I look at it, the more certain I become that this picture is forged.
But even if it isn’t forged, what is wrong with letting lost people know what church gave them the New Testament? How is this a problem?
I grew up going to hear Dr. Hyles preach. He has been a blessing to me and still is. Sure, he had his shortcomings (don’t we all?) but he kept on trying to do right until the end. Can that be said about the comm enters on this site? I doubt it.
Is Christian Socialist here today?
(I know there is a difference between Communism and Socialism–but since Fundies typically don’t, a bad joke for a cheap laugh)
“My parents did the right thing and home-schooled my siblings and me.” Ask for a refund. You get bonus points for homeschooling = the right thing. I have examined the image, and I find no evidence of photoshoppery.
Yes, we all have our shortcomings; however, we’re not building empires and holding ourselves forth as the only ones doing it right. Hyles flung himself to the stars as the shining example of True Christianity. He encouraged a generation or two of Christians to venerate him and his doctrines – some of which were pretty messed up. How is this a good thing?
Can you tell it’s photoshopped from some of the pixels and seeing a quite a few shops in your time?
First hand account of Jack Hyles & his followers:
Open letter from Jack Hyles’s daughter, Linda Murphrey to FBCH
Whoever this is knows enough to use a TOR proxy anonymizer.
I wouldn’t waste my time.
“TOR proxy anonymizer”
That sounds like it is something that would hide one’s identity/location. Correct?
Which makes this a definite Poe.
Yes, it masks your IP address so websites can’t block you from commenting/accessing.
So you are saying that he knows about OpSec?
^ +100 ^
Comment of the Day prize goes to AoW.
He’s an 18-series SEAL PJ, and a Master Expert sniper with the Corps. He also has the CIB and EIB. He received five Medals of Honor, but for missions so secret the tape giving him the instructions disintegrated. He’s in a classification all his own.
Cool, what special forces unit of the Coast Guard did he serve in?
It was the School Crossing Guards.
It was a crossing guard that was so classified that he can’t reveal the intersection, or even the continent it was on, but he did receive an earned PhD for his work there, and that too is too classified to reveal any information about the PhD.
That’s because his secret crosswalk work was critical to finding and killing Osama Bin Laden.
If they find out you posted that information on the internetz look out!
PaulnFern, please step away from the Kool-Aid pitcher.
There’ nothing about that pic that says “forgery” to me. Very poor printing quality is a hallmark of IFB & FBCH, and as a likely POE you probably already know that.
Indeed. I once picked up a fundamentalist hymnal at a garage sale. The cover proclaimed that it was for family worship use and the front matter reprinted a sermon by someone who had argued for family hymn singing in the 19th century, although somebody had come along and inserted some standard dominionist bumf that the original preacher would have put in if only he had known. 🙄 Anyway, the hymnal was a reprint of out-of-copyright Baptist revival songbooks. And wherever the old printers had economized by putting 3 hymns on 2 pages, the one that broke at the bottom of the left-hand page never had the second half on the corresponding right-hand page. They’d just taken the left-hand pages from one or two hymnals and the right-hand pages from another and fed them through a copier! That’ll be $19.95 please.
I put it down again.
I’m waiting for you to make the case for falsity, as opposed merely to asserting falsity.
Perhaps he needed that testament to remind him who he was and where he was supposed to be going.
The truly great are unaware of their greatness. And whatever blessing Christians receive they attribute to God ultimately.
You write: ‘he kept on trying to do right until the end.’
I reply: ‘you are not the one appointed to decide this. I recommend Ac 17:31 and leave it there.’
Shortcomings are no issue; the question concerns the 1Ti 3 qualifications for office. Example: the apostle wrote, ‘ma [not] … plekets.’ Plekets is rendered ‘pugnacious’ [Gingrich], ‘bully, quarrelsome’ [Friberg], ‘brawler’ [LS Lexicon], ‘bruiser, ready with a blow … , contentious’ [Thayer], ‘demanding … violent person’ [Louw-Nida]. Remember Ferny: It isn’t our fault if you have a problem with that!
PS: About that persecution card: since you play up the harassment thing because your pastor is criticized, is it acceptable for me to pretend to be all injured and bent out of shape because you bestride the socialist take on the politics of the kingdom of God?
PPS: Your spelling and punctuation are a fine tribute to the outstanding education that you received at home.
PPPS: You couldn’t access a computer when you posted? Please tell us that you weren’t texting while driving.
@PaulnFern so worshipfully wrote:
“It is not right what you are doing to Jack Hyle’s memory. He was a great man who affected a lot of people’s lives for good. It is despicable that you lot of malcontents have taken it upon yourselves to tear down his reputation after he is dead and can no longer defend himself. Have you no sense of honor?
Jack Hylyes is merely a glaring example of what happens when a mere mortal is elevated among God’s people (the world doesn’t care either way).
Your view of greatness is Jack Hyles’ view of greatness.
What is our Lord’s view of greatnes?
Matthew 18, At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, “Who then is greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” 2 Then Jesus called a little child to Him, set him in the midst of them, 3 and said, “Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5 Whoever receives one little child like this in My name receives Me.”
Poe or not, no food for this troll.
That was my final morsel of truth; I have no more to give him, not even any crumbs from the table.
Ah yes, the “I only misspelled everything because I was typing on my phone” defense. This ain’t the first time a troll has used that.
Okay, let’s see. You make fun of me for an auto-correct word and an admittedly boneheaded grammar mistake.
That is not my point, or even a point at all, and you know it! If someone tries to make a point here all he receives is childish mockery.
Why are you making fun of God’s man like this?
The Bible says to not touch God’s annotated and to do his prophet no harm. Preachers are modern-day prophets and Jack Hyles was a great one.
I look up to real men who can point the way forward for me. Jack Hyles was a man’s man. A soldier and an humble servant of God. I can think of few people I would rather have for a roll model.
I am sure that when we get to Heaven, those of you who ridicule the cause of righteousness will have reason to regret your words. When you have to give an account for everything, I am sure that what you have written here will be your greatest shame.
Well, aren’t you precious? 😆
I just wanted to point out a curious pattern I have noticed:
1. Pastor Fred.
2. Proud Fundamentilist
3. Another P F that I can’t think of at the moment.
Things that make you go Hmmmmm.
Keen observation Aow.
Please provide chapter and verse regarding Pastors being modern day prophets.
No way are you real. Fess up PnF. Who are you?
He’s been called out several times, and isn’t fessing up. At least Howard Stern crank callers fess up when they are called out.
My roll model:
I’m a biscuit man myself.
Maybe it looks Photoshopped to you because using a low price/low quality print shop puts out the same type of finished product.
I noticed humble isn’t an adjective used of Hyles. I also grew up hearing him. Narcissistic is the adjective I would use for him.
Pastors are not “modern-day prophets”; that mindset is unfortunate and gives your typical fundamentalist preacher (or at least the ones who receive attention on this site) faaaar too much credit. What’s that verse – “by their fruits you shall know them”? Well, looking at the sad list of sexual predators who are products of the Hyles legacy…what can I say, other than, draw your own conclusion. That’s a bunch of bad fruits. (Disclaimer – not all HAC grads are predators. Not even close. However, you’d be hard-pressed to come up with a similar list for, say, PCC, I think. It’s an interesting and sad link.)
I caution you to consider the legacy he has left behind (and it’s not his absence that has caused things to spiral downward – the problems were evident during his life).
Wait a second. KindofBored, you Poe’d us once a long time ago did you not? As OHappyDay perhaps?
No spaces used in your names. And responding to yourself is a great way to hide your tracks (I know, I have done it myself ).
My money is on KindofBored being PaulnFern.
A great memory have you – with you, strong the force is!
But, this is not my work; haven’t Poed in a month of Sundays.
Straight cranberry juice will fix that, I believe.
(Ignore where George put this comment first)
Okay – that made me laugh out loud. Well played, sir. Well played.
FTR, Men of God don’t cheat on their wives with their married secretaries.
If you are gonna apply that high of a standard to IFBx pastors, a whole bunch will no longer qualify for the position.
Apparently 1 Timothy 3 is one of those places much of the IFBx does not take literally.
‘God’s annotated’? You’re saying what — that prophets serve to gloss over God’s errors?
You might weigh your own words in light of the fact that Darrell is a man of God. Nor is he alone. Many men and women of God visit here. Consider your ways.
Or the error of his ways. 🙂
Were it not for the autocorrect issue, “annotated” would tag him as a Poe fer sher. But, I’m still unsher.
Straight cranberry juice will fix that, I believe.
Right person, wrong spot.
I’ve noticed George strikes more often after a 3 hour sleep night as opposed to 7 or 8. He knows when I’m not alert…………….
Uncle – You need to stop posting before you hurt someone. 😆
Too late! I need some assistance over here!
Hyles worshipper wrote:
“I look up to real men who can point the way forward for me. Jack Hyles was a man’s man. A soldier and an humble servant of God. I can think of few people I would rather have for a roll model.”
Unrelated Obama supporter wrote somewhere:
“I look up to real men who can point the way forward for me. Barack Obama is a man’s man. A soldier and an humble servant of America. I can think of few people I would rather have for a roll model.”
😯 I’m not sure what my point is, but it seems to work!
I say the same thing about Jim Jones, my pastor. He was a man of God who died as a tragic martyr along with many in my church. Jim was a man’s man, a soldier and a humble servant of God. And he looked plumb skippy in his sunglasses, like Dr. Hyles. They’ve both gone on now, and I suspect that they’ve already met.
I suspect that, too.
Uh, your pastor didn’t die in 19878, did he? 😕
I meant 19 Seventy-Eight, darn that George! 😳
@PR, my preacher did die in 1978. I’ve never been the same.
Paul to the Corinthians: “For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.” (II Cor. 10:12) Every preacher out there attests to the fact that the apostle Paul is his mentor. And yet, they still go about doing the very thing Paul criticizes here. You’ll be pleased that I resisted the urge to capitalize “ARE NOT WISE…” in the text. There are times I exhibit restraint.
To elevate any man in the church to professional status is clearly unscriptural, not being in keeping with the functioning of the body of Christ metephor we see throughout the New Testament.
Here is an excerpt from a pastor’s letter of resignation:
“. . . though there are clearly recognized leaders in the New Testament Church (Heb13:7, 17) there is no artificial clergy/laity distinction. What makes a pastor more reverend than the least part of Christ’s body? All believers are to function as priests (1 Pet 2:5, 9) and the pastor-teacher’s job is to equip the saints so that the saints can do the work of the ministry (Eph 4:11-16). New Testament church leaders were player-coaches, not star-players. The word minister has been professionalized and made to refer to pastors, but Ephesians 4:12 indicates that it is the saints who are the real ministers.”
Fundamentalism isn’t the only movement steeped in this problem, though they seem to take it to a “new” level.
Another fine article. I appreciate that pastor’s spirit! Thank you for this. I like the places you visit. Blessings!
Semp is correct.
@Kreine, I do own a red imitation “leather”, somewhat large, NASB red letter edition Ryrie Study bible! 😀
I prefer John Deere tractors; Hey, I’ll change my moniker to “BigGreenOne!” That might generate some confusion. 😐
@BRO: Just curious, is your name from your affinity with Farmall/International tractors?
It looks like the moniker is taken from the Big Red One — the First Infantry Division, United States Army. The Fighting First makes its home at Ft Riley in Kansas.
Nah. The handle references his oversize, red calfskin leather-bound KJB. 😉
I am surprised that this “Bible” is showing so much wear. Pope Jack was famous for saying “put down your bibles and just listen to me”, so it was probably not handled much (at least for reading/reference purposes). That is a very common trait in fundy churches…they talk about the bible, but seldom use it. Any MOG worth his salt can take a random verse and use it as the base text for a sermon on being in church “whenever the doors are open”, keeping the women-folk out of britches, spanking your kids until they are 21, pastoral authority, etc, etc, etc.
The wear doesn’t come from reading the book, silly. It’s from using it to smack grandmas and subdue interrupting dogs and babies.
BG – You have insight beyond that of most metal men. I beginning to think of you as the Fundy Whisperer.
“Mortal” men, not “metal” men…unless you are really into Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, etc.
BREAKIN THE LAW BREAKIN THE LAW!!!! Metal men? Yes, please…
Until they are 21? You liberal compromiser!
Who said you can stop when they’re 21?
No Big Gary, you are the liberal compromiser! At 21 they should be married with a baby on the way!
You’re not suggesting that marriage would take them outside of the umbrella of their fathers’ authority, are you? 😯
Usually they acknowledge that marriage sets up another household with a new umbrella, but sometimes they still keep expecting the adult children to kow-tow to their parents.
Along those lines, I found this quote on the internet the other day and it was a powerful image for me:
“I used to see my husband and myself as the trunk of the vine, grafted into the rootstock that is God, and the children as branches curving away from the same source, in a tended and orderly fashion that I could both understand and more or less control. Now I imagine me more like a dandelion and the kids like the seeds in the puffball who will, in their time, burst out and be carried away willy nilly, ultimately to put down their own roots and contribute to the beauty of some distant meadow of their own choosing.”
PW, I wish someone would show that quote to my mother!!
Forensic testing shows that the “wear” on this bible cover is consistent with “wear” resulting from firmly gripping the bible by the spine and waving it overhead while singing ‘Hold the Fort’.
Yep, and the deoxyribonucleic acid and latent fingerprints have shown to be those of several members of FBCH during the years following the print of said pew bible.