Wanting America Back

I nominate this song for the Least Musical Lyrics Ever award. The Jack Hyles voice over starting at 1:55 is classic.

I think one of the video comments says it all:

i think the three who disliked better watch there backs i feel sorry for them cause they have to look over there shoulders everyday bu thank GOD for MAN OF๏ปฟ GOD LIKE DR.JACK HYLES who stood up for GOD and whats right.

Amen.

124 thoughts on “Wanting America Back”

  1. thank God for a man who lived like an alley cat and preached heresy! We need more men like that in America! ROFLMBO!

  2. I vote YES for the LEAST MUSICAL LYRICS EVER award….we had to learn this song when I was on a tour group from HAC and our tour leader (who tried miserably to sound like Hyles & Schaap) did the monologue. *gag* can’t even stomach the video.

    1. BlueEyedRain, keep asking questions like that and “they” might come after you ๐Ÿ˜ฎ ๐Ÿ˜€
      Polished Shaft, you do know me, now sending you a message on your blog, which I’m enjoying.

  3. Back? They want America back? There is a lot of presumption in that word.
    “This nation is like a runaway train headed down the wrong track”. That is a weird metaphor.
    “From those who have no self-control ”
    What? Like fundies?

    1. Is a runaway train ok if its on the right track…still sounds dangerous to me. I mean it is going to have to stop at some point right?

    1. Need more people disliking! They are still up 49-10 positive feedback, and need to be well into negative territory…

  4. Wow, not listening to the words it sounds uber-patriot, but when you pay attention to the words its a ‘everything sucks about America’ diatribe.

    Mind boggling waste of tube bandwidth.

    1. Fundies loooooove America, they just hate 9/10ths of its inhabitants.

    1. oh no you di-ent…lol it could be construed as such from that gem of a song

      1. Not all that surprising really, when you consider how fundies love to speak of America like it’s God’s chosen nation.

  5. Attended a fundy lite church with family today…

    Pledges to the American and Christian flags…check
    Pounding ooom pa pa patriotic hymns…check
    cognitively dissonant theologically confused lyrics…check
    (glory glory hallelujah for amillenialism in a pretrib premill church)
    conflation of serving/fighting for U.S. and the army of God…Check
    Sudden awkward transition one song before sermon to an actual worship service…check (this one is optional)

    1. The video comment is jaw-droppingly horrible: horrible grammar, missing punctuation, misspelled words, run-on sentences, intolerance, threats instead of love toward those with different opinions, feigned compassion (“I feel sorry for them”) and equating loving God with loving a pastor. Makes me cringe.

      1. This comment is reason number one why I do not comment on the blog. Too many english teachers here for me…..

    2. Sounds about right for especially fundy churches, but that patriotism has infected a lot more than just fundy churches, just seems to be worst (sic?) in them. I texted one of my PCC friends this morning (I think before this was posted), that “Jesus die for America”. I didn’t have to state cause we both understood that includes “Jesus died for low marginal tax rates that are easily avoided through massive loopholes, unending warfare, and constant undermining of any & all forms of a social safety net”. I bet I could get someone in fundyland to say they agree with all of that. ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. Personally I like the lukewarm hymn in my lukewarm mainstream Anglican hymnal that includes the lukewarm unamurrican lines,

    From all that terror teaches,
    From lies of tongue and pen,
    From all the easy speeches
    That comfort cruel men,
    From sale and profanation
    Of honor, and the sword,
    From sleep, and from damnation,
    Deliver us, good Lord!

  7. Ugh. Before I knew any better, I actually used to like this group. Sadly, they were (at that time) one of the better groups at FBC.

    Finally enjoying the freedom to explore real music.

  8. i think the three who disliked better watch there backs

    Jeez.

    I started the video and became wroth to realize that I have actually heard this song somewhere. I was even more upset to find out that the few times I’ve heard this, those arche, stentorian tones in the spoken word section were those of Jack Hyles. Ugh.

    1. Which continent, North or South America. In that continent, which country?

  9. “This nation is like a runaway train
    Heading down the wrong track
    It’s time for the army of God to arise and say
    ‘We want America back.’

    Holy mixed metaphors, Batman.

    1) Is a runaway train heading down the right track any better?

    2) How does the Army of God stop the runaway train? Blow it up?

    1. Faster than a Speeding bullet,
      More Powerful than a locomotive,
      Look there on youtube,
      its a fundie,
      its a fanatic,
      Its SUPERJACK!

      He’ll put the runaway train back on the right track! And lead the Army o god… right onto the tracks ahead of the runaway train.

    2. Glad I didn’t have a mouthful of coffee this time. I’ve learned to put down any drinks before reading SFL (even though I think I need alcoholic ones after).

    3. “2) How does the Army of God stop the runaway train? Blow it up?”

      There actually is a domestic terrorist organization called “Army of God”, and if a train car was ever converted to a gay bar, then it is plausible that they would make like the French Resistance and blow the train off the track.

      Bad choice of words. Olympic Park Bomber (Atlanta, 1996), Eric Rudolph is one of their members.

      1. The Muslims already have an Army of God — that’s what Hezbollah means. So maybe Hyles and crowd are really secretly Islamic terrorists funded by Iran? Except the real Hezbollah at least feeds the poor and does social services while fundies typically do not, so maybe not.

    4. I’m guessing having affairs with your secretary go a long ways to catching the runaway train & getting it on the right track!

    5. This made me laugh. Hard. What have I been missing? Just found SFL for the first time today. This is incredible…

      1. The next few days are not your own. You have to read the entire archive of posts! . . . At least, that’s what I did when I discovered this site. :mrgreen:

  10. @3:10, Hyles says, “30 years ago, the #1 television show was the Andy Griffith Show, and look… what… we… have… today.” I decided to take him up on the offer.

    The top shows for the 2009-10 season are as follows:

    1. American Idol Live Show
    2. American Idol Results Show
    3. NBC Sunday Night Football
    4. FOX Sunday Night Football
    5. CBS Sunday Night Football
    6. Undercover Boss
    7. The Big Bang Theory.

    Yeah, not exactly a cornucopia of depravity and sodomy, aside from maybe the butt-pats those football players give each other.

    1. I remember going to a fundy seminar once where the speaker asked us what the worst show on TV was. His answer? America’s Funniest Videos. His reason? It encouraged viewers to laugh at people’s misfortune instead of being compassionate. My response? The speaker was an idiot.

      1. Growing up during the heyday of baptist fundamentalism in the 1970’s, I remember a traveling fundy speaker (Sketch Erickson) that would warn the masses about the evils of contemporary media (rock music, movies, television, etc…) who put Hogans Heroes as one of the top ten worst shows ever because they poked fun at Germans, which apparently offended his German-descent friends…. I realized then that these fundy speakers were quite subjective with their reasonings…..

      2. I agree that AFHV is a bad show because it encourages people to laugh at victims of accidents, including little kids getting scared and possibly hurt. The worst show, no, not by far.

    2. @ pastors wife > I wasn’t allowed to watch AFV for that very reason. Today, hubby and I make it our Sunday evening ritual.

    3. 30 years ago the number one rated show was Dallas because the year was 1981. Of course that’s the least offensive thing he says in the clip.

      1. Thirty years ago… That is why I work with computers… because I can’t count… Around here we depend on Shoes to do all the counting…

        Well, uh, Jack Hyles died in 2001… that’s it… we should start counting from 2001…

        (Got out of that one…)

      2. The Andy Griffith Show was cancelled in 1968. Its direct spinoff, Mayberry R.F.D., was cancelled in 1971 as part of CBS’s famous ‘rural purge’. Mayberry R.F.D. never placed higher than 4th in the Nielsens and was at #15 when it was cancelled. Even dating back from the man’s death, he’s wrong.

        The Top Ten in 1971:

        All in the Family
        The Flip Wilson Show
        Gunsmoke
        ABC Movie of the Week
        Sanford and Son
        Mannix
        Funny Face
        Adam 12
        The Mary Tyler Moore Show

        By Fundamentalist standards, every single one of these (including the ABC Movie of the Week, depending upon which one it is) miss the mark. Adam 12 is probably the least objectionable, as it shows the consequences of breaking the law, but depictions of violence might push it over the edge.

  11. Ugh. I just love the reverence with which he says, “The Andy Griffith Show.”

    Thanks, Darrell, for reminding me that my church is awesome! I’d completely forgotten it was July 4th weekend today until I saw this after church. ๐Ÿ˜€

    1. No joke there are pulpiteers here in NC who use episodes as sermon illustrations. No BULL GIPP, I have sat through many sermons where the Andy Griffith Show was use as a main point in the sermon. ๐Ÿ™„

      1. I have heard of churches in NC doing Mayberry style devotionals using the Andy Griffith Show as the backdrop. In fact, someone wrote a book with this as the concept

        http://www.bhpublishinggroup.com/mayberry/

        The Way Back to Mayberry

        —-

        By the way, It’s interesting to know that the name of the church on that show was “All Souls Church”. but no denomination was listed. Were they non-denominational or independent fundamentalist baptist?

    2. Has anyone else noticed that Andy always seemed to lie about something? Wait, maybe he was a fundamental.

        1. But Barney was only allowed one bullet, because he was so clumsy. Andy kept the bullets!

          To be fair to the show, old-fashioned police work did involve a certain amount of deception and shading of the truth (the show is pre-Miranda and takes place in the pre-civil rights rural south, after all). That doesn’t excuse some of the things Andy did in his personal life, however.

  12. Public Schools that in many cases resemble war zones
    Means: that you need to $end your kid$ to our “Christian” $chool.

    Many times the wild eyed, drug addicted teenager is allowed to say in out public schools
    Means: Ble$$ god they need to be in put in a Roloff home or another similiar behavorial modification center and we’ll beat the devil out of them.

    The Supreme Court decided to expell God’s Bible
    **Fact Check: the Bible has not been expelled by the Supreme court. The Bible is actually a curriculum course in many school districts. It’s just not taught as a Fundie Evangelistic tool.

    Ok, I’ve had enough, Jack is insufferable.

  13. Our church had an American flag flying out front today. Of course, we met at our house and I had my flag out for the holiday. We didn’t sing the Battle Hymn of the Republic though. :mrgreen:

  14. Went to a new church today forgetting it was 4th of July weekend. Back home at my Baptist church was “Freedom Celebration: A Patriotic Musical,” at the new church we visited: “Getting Back to Basics: Salvation.” I think I’m in love; not one mention of the holiday and the place was actually pretty full. But what else would you expect from a the limp-wrist-ed liberal bastion that is the Brethren in Christ!

  15. [quote]thank GOD for MAN OF๏ปฟ GOD LIKE DR.JACK HYLES who stood up for GOD and whats right.[/quote]

    He did? When?

  16. I say the 4th of July is a great time for thanking God he never let the Fundies have our country in the first place so they can’t take it “back” having never had it..

    Not sure if that makes sense.

  17. Not a mention of the 4th in our church today. Not a Patriotic song, not a pledge… the flags came down in our re-model years ago… so Ole Glory was nowhere to be seen. God was lifted up, though!!!

    1. I think it’s fine to celebrate the holiday, I don’t have a problem with that. However, it shouldn’t dominate.

  18. We had patriotic songs, but the special music and sermon weren’t about America. It was ok – especially since my husband leads the music. :mrgreen:

  19. This is a southern gospel song originally done by The Steele family. FBCH stole it from them.

    1. I thought that Jack Hyles preached against southern gospel — what in the world is he doing using it? Seems like a double-standard here…

      1. Ah Southern Gospel is only okay if it is “fundied” up by groups at FBCH then released on a CD recorded at Faith Music Mission. I have heard whole sermons on how it is okay to use SG songs but not listen to the liberal Southern Baptist sing it. It has to be someone with a pure heart for God. Gerald Wolf is whose songs they prefer and he is an amazing Chirstian man.

      2. Still seems hypocritical; SOMEONE has to listen to the “wrong” version in order to “fundy it up”.

      3. I ask the same thing about television: why are televangelists preaching against television when they themselves are on it?! If they think that it’s so immoral, they might better get off of it and stick to radio and books and CDs (entirely different animals), because preaching against the very thing that they’re using to preach against it is very hypocrisy.

  20. “Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord” does NOT refer to America! UGH!

  21. I had an old friend, a deeply committed Christian and a veteran of World War II (a participant in the one of the major bombing expeditions [which shall remain nameless.] It scarred him for life). One Sunday while vacationing, he, his wife and a couple of their (grown) children attended a fundie Baptist church on what happened to be Independence Day Sunday. The whole hour was a rah-rah, wave-the-flag orgy of patriotism. When he came out of the service and got in the car, he exclaimed to his family in total disgust, “I don’t EVER want to go to church there again.”

    One of his other sons was the pastor.

    True story.

    1. I have a friend who is a retired Army Ranger and he hates patriotic church services. He says that that “lard-ass” namby-pambies waving the flag around like a totem haven’t got the stuff to cash the cheques their loud obnoxious mouths write – instead they send him and his buddies off to kill people and get shot at. I laughed when he said it, but he was pretty serious.

    2. My father is a retired Marine who has been having lots of issues dealing with his time in Vietnam. I showed him video of a Fundamentalist service in the Midwest that capitalized on the theme ‘Onward Christian Soldiers’ by playing martial music and having military hardware on display. He was most displeased and disgusted, to say the least.

      A few years ago (not long after the Iraq War started) I saw a tapestry someone had made, tacky even by Fundamentalist standards, showing the faces of Bush, Cheney, Powell, et.al. looking down from the heavens at scenes of war in the Middle East, with the caption ‘God Bless America’. I think that’s when I finally pulled the plug on Fundamentalism for good.

  22. I once heard a song leader at Berean Baptist Church (Springfield, MO) say,

    “The only thing better than being a Christian, is being an American.”

    Freudian slip?

  23. Needless fact-checking of Jack Hyles’ statements aside, it is not the government’s responsibility to indoctrinate students with any religion, Christianity or otherwise. If you truly believe that the government is so inefficient and wasteful, why would you want to entrust it with that responsibility?

  24. I have to chime in with some gratitude for my church, too. I went to the 5PM service last night and there was absolutely no mention of ‘Merika or the holiday until the very end when the announcements were being made and the pastor wished everyone a safe independence day and made a joke about blowing your fingers off or something like that. I was really pleased as this was my first 4th of July there.

  25. We had Mass as usual..but Father Krempa did mention it in his sermon but there none of this scathing ‘take it back’ nonsense. ๐Ÿ˜€

  26. This reminds me of when Justin Timberlake put out that song, “I’m Bringing Sexy Back.” My friends and I wanted to know exactly where he thought it had been all this time. It is not like our generation kept it in the dungeon or sent it off to Europe. For crying out loud, Jennifer Lopez was walking the runway in a strategically placed scarf.
    And when I hear things like this, I want to ask, exactly what they want America back to or from. Do they want back the moral purity of slavery or the godliness of segregation? How about the splendor of starvation in the Gilded Age? Or perhaps they are pining for the freeness and morality of the Old West which teemed with brothels and where โ€œrightโ€ was defined by the man with the fastest draw.

    1. When you are a Fundy, you can’t let facts get in the way of your delusional revisionist view of history!

  27. “It’s time for the army of God to arise and say we want America back”

    Is this the same army of God that does “not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places” or is this a different army that does do battle with flesh and blood politicians?

  28. Yes, public schools are so much worse than schools in the local baptist church basement. The fact that Andy Griffith is a liberal democrat doesn’t seem to factor in his speech. Finally, when the rapture happens, they’ll have America back.

  29. That song is fraking hilarious. I could only stomach about 60 seconds, but, man! Don’t know whether to laugh or barf.

  30. I only made it about a minute in, not even to the chorus. haha. This line just made me shake my head: “Where are the men who once stood for right
    And the women who championed their cause?”
    Because, of course, it only matters that men stand for right. Women don’t count unless they’re cheerleading the right-standing men. ๐Ÿ™„ I managed to keep my stomach long enough to skim the lyrics elsewhere (just couldn’t bear either the singer or Hyles), and was both unsurprised and baffled by them. I can’t understand or abide that entire mindset, even when it isn’t couched in the worst song ever.

  31. The song may have its flaws, but I do think America has changed, spiritually for the worse. I enjoy the technology we have today, but I despair over the morals. Teachers used to have to worry about students chewing gum or talking in class; now we have students killing other students. We have certainly fallen from where we were.

    1. Actually, no. Violent crime and school shooting rates keep going down. It’s news reporting of them that keeps going up.

    2. I wonder if they heard of the Bath School Disaster in Michigan where a disgruntled school board member killed 38 elementary school students – in 1927!!! (I know I’d never heard of it until just a few years ago.)

      Or the terrorist bombing on Wall Street when the bomber left 100 lbs. of dynomite in front of bank and killed over 30 people; it happened in 1920!

      Instead of yearning for an innocent (and mythical) past, Christians should focus on Christ’s kingdom.

  32. I pick up hymnals at garage sales for our church’s Sunday school program. I found a nice thick one, well bound, clear print, that even had the Hallelujah Chorus in four-part harmony in the back. Cool, I thought, and set it aside for a while.

    I picked it up again today and read some of the other hymns. In paraphrase except where quoted:

    I love to sing to God, sing all the time, yes I do . . . second verse, same as the first . . . ain’t we happy that we don’t make music like “sinners” and “worldlings,” yes we are . . . Parable of the Rich Man and the Publican? What’s that?

    Some glurge about a “dying little gypsy [sic!] boy” who got saved an hour before his death and spent part of that hour telling the people around him to go soul winning. Ecch.

    Oh, wouldn’t it be so sad to get to Heaven without any “trophy” to show to Jesus? We can’t show up “empty-handed.” We need to do the work of Jesus. Which is? Soul-winning, of course!

    AFAICT there is not.one.word about actually giving somebody a bowl of soup or a dollar bill that is not a disguised tract. Even the index lists these hymns under “Soul-Winning and Service.” As if they were the same thing.

    One by John R. Rice, of whom I hadn’t heard when I wasted a dollar on this thing, about the need to nag and badger and hector and belabor your own family so that they’re all there to meet you at the Pearly Gates.

    The publisher? Sword of the Lord. I thought it was a rather bombastic name when I bought the book. Now I know enough to consign it to the kindling pile.

    What a waste of a buck.

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