Why is he yelling? I suggest he smoke one of those joints he’s shouting about and mellow out a bit.
Scarier than “Paranormal Activity 2”.
Why don’t his knees bend?
“Why don’t his knees bend?”
He’s probably sore from jumping up and down off the pews
What is he addicted to? Looks like some serious uppers.
“You need to get addicted to Jesus!” And PCP, apparently.
Watching him in action, I kept thinking this was a video to warn people about the dangers of crystal meth.
Is that the “I’m not crazy I’m saved” guy? http://www.facebook.com/topic.php?uid=337487493925&topic=12801
I’ve said it before, and will say it again. It’s a true blessing to know that Job, Abram, & Noah were all KJVO Baptists who had all asked Jesus into their hearts!
The guy on the front pew looks like my Dad from behind. I wonder if it is…
Anyway, I think he ripped his sermon off of Carman…
Proof that Evangelicals, as well as Fundamentalists, have things to be embarrassed about.
hahahaha….that song is horrible.
There have been very few times in my life that I’ve seen a person literally turn purple in the face. This is one of them.
My baby turns purple in the face when she is pooping.
Why, thank you for sharing that.
I would say the end result of your baby and this turning purple guy is about the same. 😈
Should have read “…the end result of your baby and this guy turning purple is about the same”
I’m just wondedring if he’s wearing a diaper, he may be excrementing out both ends.
Go to his youtube page for a few more.
more preaching/yelling/blah, but,
The best part is the one video he ‘favorited’ is a mexican restarant mariachi version of the Alabama fight song.
good for a double SFL since he is a secular college football fan enough to get his kicks from a fight song.
He looks like he’s doing an impression of Chris Farley (rest his soul) from SNL. All that’s lacking is the “living in a van down by the river” line.
I’m sorry…what language was he speaking/yelling? I honestly couldn’t understand a word coming out of his mouth.
The accent didn’t help, but hoo-boy, this guy needs to work on delivery and diction. I’ve never heard anybody yell in a monotone before. To be fair to him, I only lasted for about a minute into the diatribe, so maybe it got clearer later. What I heard was nearly incomprehensible.
That’s Middle Alabama Rural Southern English. Not usually that unintelligible, but it’s been aggravated by a healthy dose of Fundy vocal histrionics.
healthy = heaping.
There’s no Confederate flag on the platform so it might be more Southern Kentuckian Rustic English.
Good ear, sir. Either that or you’ve been subjected to this sort of torture before. His other YouTube videos–hey, he posted them himself–show him preaching(?!?) in a Baptist church in Alabama.
That was supposed to be a response to Jordan, not Stan, despite the way it lines up.
Yup, he’s right…it is Alabamian.
He’s from Alabama but was “called” to go to Montana. That explains the cowboy gear. He says on FB:
“I was saved on March 22, 2000, called to preach on Jan. 7, 2007, then called to go to Montana as a missionary evangelist on May 1, 2008.”
What’s with Montana attracting all the nut jobs?
During the British Mad Cow Disease epidemic, the State of Montana held a contest for a new state motto. This was when the Unabomber and the Montana Militia (a violent leftist crazy person and a group of violent rightist crazy people, respectively) were also in the news for their doings in Montana. For the new motto, one Montanan came up with, “At least our cattle are sane.”
A little off topic, but the church I went to this morning had…a white piano. That’s right. There was a white baby grand sitting up front, just like in the infamous picture. True story. I didn’t see it at first (sound familiar? 😉 ), but once I did I busted up laughing. Y’all have ruined me! I couldn’t help by start laughing every time I noticed it for the rest of the service!
That’s fantastic. I often snicker or roll my eyes when encountering SFL stuff in church (particularly visiting our parents’ churches) but a white piano would send me over the edge . . . if I saw it, that is.
I suspect you had some cheerios past their due date for breakfast? 🙂
Nope. My cereal and milk were well within their due date. Also, the church doesn’t have weekly communion, so you can’t blame that either. 😉
I work at a mainline church. Our pianos are ebony. That tells you everything you need to know.
I was looking at our church’s black baby grand today. I thought about it being white and started to laugh.
God gives us free wheel.
I’d trade it for free oil changes for a year.
I dunno. Wheels can be expensive.
And most fundies claim their free wheel is the stearing wheel…
Was anyone else wondering what he would take off and throw at someone next? 🙄
Is this a video of John preaching?
Normal person would take the fact “addiction” is only found one time in the Bible (not sure what the greek is , or if greek is used elsewhere), and say you can’t make much of doctrinal assertion based on a sole use, that is unexpounded upon. That’s not even a speed bump for fundies! Oh how much do I need these dimwits in my life! 🙂
That is the IFB way of inventing doctrine:
Take one verse, out of context, mix liberally with a healthy dose of opinion and shout it out!
Voila’ new doctrine.
You need to be addicted to Christ because he will make you high… Cheap high from a cheap god. 🙁
That was…so…bad. I had to leave the house, get into my car, drive a few miles, make a few turns, pull into the animal shelter lot, go inside the building, sign in, go into the animal cage area, and punch a few cats right in the stomach.
It was that bad.
I don’t even know where to go with that.
The animal shelters around here don’t offer that service.
Well, they are desperate for donations. I leave a bag of cat-type food when I go there.
I just added trip to Sam’s Club trip before animal shelter to my to do list for today!
Joshua Akins joins Tony Hutson (the dude who says if he doesn’t like the way you made the food, he’ll throw it on the floor) on the list of preachers who are NOT invited to my house. Not only do I not want to have to clean all the floors, but I can’t afford to buy a lot of new furniture, either.
I always get very nervous when someone is preaching and they read “the passage” (i.e. one verse) and then shut their Bible. This guy takes it to a whole new level, when half way through his ranting and raving he throws the Bible onto the front pew.
There would be a serious discrepancy with his fundamentalism though since they do have an electric guitar 🙂 😆
…an electric BASS guitar. They’re not evil like the six-string version.
Twelve-string guitars are twice as evil. Hmmmm.
I followed the videos and wish I hadn’t. “God’s Whipping Post”… I could have wept. 1) there’s a banjo case open on the pew behind him 2)that’s a Western shirt and bolo tie he’s wearing and if there’s not a pair of Tony Lama’s or Dan Posts on his feet I’ll eat my own Stetson 3) the whip–what can I say? He knows how to crack a whip and has built a sermon (rant) around that gimmick, mangling a verse or two in the process, no doubt. He may be from Alabama, but he’s putting on the cowboy! This drugstore cowboy preacher has been grazing in the loco weed!
What an ignorant BS artist!
He wants everyone to be spiritually addicted to the things of God as if it is the same as some sort of sinful, physical addiction.
This ignorant, cult apologist, PB is too lazy to even look the word up in his Strong’s. But why let the facts get in the way of a good rant. If this is Christianity and good preaching… I’ll pass. And I’ll warn others to stay away from this poison as well.
Strong’s G5021 – tassÅ
1) to put in order, to station
a) to place in a certain order, to arrange, to assign a place, to appoint
1) to assign (appoint) a thing to one
b) to appoint, ordain, order
1) to appoint on one’s own responsibility or authority
2) to appoint mutually, i.e. agree upon
The KJV! It’s about the KJV brother! Remove not the ancient landmarks! Touch not the unclean versions! Did Paul use the Greek!? I think NOT!
You so stole my thoughts..this is an oxymoron..a screaming KJV preacher with a electric bass guitar.
In the South where Southern Gospel/Bluegrass is found in many fundy churches, the Electric Bass Guitar gets special dispensation.
And it’s often a WOMAN who plays the bass! Notice also the black acoustic (not electric) guitar leaning against the wall on the right. (And as much as I want to mention the white piano…)
I never would’ve spotted the guitar! I did think the on stage keyboard was interesting, and relieving, cause totally invalidates the need to pretend there’s a white piano!
I didn’t think pink or purple were masculine enough for a preacher boy to wear.
Pink, no but as sons and daughters of the Almighty, we should be allowed to wear the royal purple.
Unlike his hearers, I have not “heard that whole long story” and thank God I never will.
Hey, God sure has called a lot of PB’s in this congregation.
I love the key chain in the pocket! Very stylish–it makes him look so important and grown-up.
Has this guy “taken a pill of acid”?
This type of “Preaching” if you can call it that…Demeans the entire vocation of clergy…
I lasted until 15 seconds in…right up to the point where he finished reading, announced that was the only verse he was going to read, shut his Bible and put it on the corner of the pulpit.
That just about sums up many Fundy sermons.
You didn’t miss anything. 🙄
All too often the reading of the passage is only a formality that allows the â€˜preacherâ€™ to claim his bogus ideas are â€˜biblicalâ€™.
The preacherboy culture is a culture of worshiping men (nay, not ordinary men, but pillars of the fundamentalist faith). The sad fact is that many fundy preachers (especially PBs) have the outlook that we donâ€™t need more of what God says, we need more of what the Man of god says. 🙁
You did miss where he subsequently took said closed KJV and tossed it down on the front pew, and may or may not have stepped on it in his pew jumping antics!
I liked the way they had the men on one side of the church and women on the other side, ’cause you don’ wan’ git addicted to th opsite sex! (is that how you write Rural Alabama English?)
Hadn’t noticed that.
Not only is he crazy, but asexual as well?
in Pee Wee Herman voice …..*What? WHAT??????*
two words…nut job
seriously this type of screaming and temper tantrum makes me want to run far from Christianity. This guy is a complete embarrassment to the cause of Christ.
Well, this should give us assurance about Christianity. Only something so valuable could have so many pathetic counterfeits.
he does the whole tie-loosening deal in this video, too. but he’s not wearing a jacket.
Couldn’t help but make a sarcastic comment.
He is wearing a coat at the beginning. He takes it off – good Fundyland posture.
whoa. i think he’s wearing blue jeans in that “whippin’ post” video.
I am a glutton for punishment. I watched his sermon “God’s whipping post.” He says that every sin you commit as a Christian, God will beat you with a whip at the judgement seat. I listened to both parts of this monstrosity and couldnt believe what i was hearing. This dude is unbelieveably stupid. He even used a bullwhip as a prop and at the end was screaming “God’s gonna gitcha.”
Yes! Standard fundy eschatology. I think that’s the Bema seat maybe? I just hope these guys actuall do get beatings for preaqching the BS!
and beatings for preaching it too… 😆
Yes, that too!
Not really sure if I’d consider Christ’s return a “blessed hope” if THAT’S what was awaiting us.
I’ll be the first to admit I know zip about theology but I have never read that anywhere in my bible, KJV or any other version. Here is someone who, IMNSHO, could really use a few drugs; or something to mellow him out.
You know, a joint everyday, would make him tolerable.
For him or for us? 😎
@Scorpio I think for safety everyone should. Can never be too safe!
Of course. You’re completely forgiven by Jesus when you ask Him into your heart… until you commit your first sin after that.
At about 1 minute in, this guy says his preacher friend or some preacher he knows, wrote foot prints in the sand. Then he preaches on every fundy cliche ever mentioned on this website. He even humiliates everyone who didnt bring a Bible.
The “Footprints in the Sand” chestnut has been attributed to hundreds of different people, including Anonymous, with scores of people claiming to be the original writer (in several different languages, I might add). It’s been traced back at least to the 19th century.
The saying is that “Victory has a thousand fathers, but defeat is an orphan,” and that particular piece of hokum has about a million putative authors.
Wikipedia says that it may originate with a sermon preached by Charles Haddon Spurgeon in 1880:
If that kid knew the Rev. Spurgeon personally, he’s a lot older than he looks.
He has the same keychain in this video. And the shirt isn’t fundy white. I’ll chalk it up as a youthful indiscretion. There’s still time for him to repent and become a full blown fundy preacher boy.
Is there a guy’s side and a girl’s side in this church? It sure looks like it.
Sure could have done without a Bonus like T-H-A-T!
And people sit under such obvious drivel. This cheapens the Gospel of Christ. To allow a turd like this to stand and so-call preach is an abomination! AAARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!! 😡
God Save us from such preaching and stupidity!
I feel like that TSA protester dude! If kicks me in the junk with another bonus like that we should have him arrested!
The guy in the third row appears to be embarrassed for the kid, and I noticed the red haired girl sticking her finger in her ear at one point.
Future SFL contributors maybe?
Voted most likely to lose his voice by the class of 2010.
From the way he looks in that image, I’d say most likely to stress out and have a heart attack before age 40.
Boy, sit down and shut up. What you are doing cannot be called preaching!
Why does he feel the need to yell so much? , IMHO, people who yell a lot like that don’t have much to say; the reason they yell is because they’re trying to cover up the lack of content. Or to cover up the lack of quality of any content that’s there. I hate it when people yell like that; it’s a major turn-off. Ugh!
I couldn’t understand a single word of that. Stuff like this is how I know it’s okay not to go to church. In fact, I wonder if God would prefer that those in attendance at a service like this would just walk out.
If I was still Fundy and happened to wander uponst that church, I would probably be freaked out. Even as a fundy.
That is very true… I am actually not quite sure he would be considered a fundy at all. That may be more of a pentecostal church. I wonder when the snake handling service will be held.
I’ve seen and heard that sort of thing in IFB churches. Made me retreat into my happy place where I couldn’t hear him. As far as now, I’d get up and walk outta there.
“Brother Wendy you mean to tell me if the Lord told you to take up the Serpent you would’nt take him up?”
Bro. Wendy answered, “Yes ma’am I surely would, but He didn’t and I ain’t!” 😯
You have a valid point, ABG. Like Paul told the Corinthians in chapter 11 who were abusing the Lord’s Table at Communion, they had come together not for the better but for the worse! Of course we should assemble as believers for instruction & encouragement, but that is neither.
He sounds like a Baptist Barney Fife. The whole thing sounds like one of those diatribes Barney would go on. He’s even got the voice and accent. Maybe someone should have nipped his preaching career in the bud. Also, love the sing-song-y monotone yell.
Good Lawurd! I kin’t hardly understayund a thang that thar boy is a sayun’
Seriously messed up. Wow… =(
I thought that WAS my son for just a second. But my brave handsome man has a much more authoritative style and is far more animated. He makes this Johnny-wanna-be look like one of those manikins at Woolworths. I did like his content though. I was convicted about not being as addicted to Jesus as some who is addicted to the funny stuff. I haven’t sold all my worldly goods, lost weight till I was skin and bones, stolen money, lost my family and friends and gone to jail or lived in the gutter for Jesus. But maybe one day. I don’t know if I would’ve walked the aisle at the invitation, but I definitely would’ve waved my hankey.
IT’S LIKE SOMEONE TURNED HIS CAPS LOCK BUTTON ON.
AND HE’S STUCK ON STUPID, ON STUPID, ON STUPID, ON STUPID, ON STU… 😯
That was one of the funniest things I ever saw
I was wondering how the staff here at SFL were able to stealthily enter these churches and record the video of these poor excuses for ministers? Then as I read down the thread, I discovered that this one at least was posted on Facebook. Wow! This is one light that I would definitely be hiding under a bushel.
You must be logged in to post a comment.
This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.