Fundamentalists may not engrave the Scripture on the mantels of their doorposts but they do like to post it up just about everywhere else.
Nothing says “Howdy, neighbor!” like a big sign posted on the lawn bearing the message “BUT ALL THE WICKED WILL HE DESTROY” Or, if that isn’t forceful enough perhaps one with the words “THE WICKED SHALL BE TURNED INTO HELL” will get the point across.
In case you want to take your message on the go, these signs are also available as bumper stickers. Nothing will make someone think twice like a mini-van bearing the ominous message “PREPARE TO MEET THY GOD.”
Another option for those who just don’t have time to stop and chat is the ever-popular sandwich board Scripture verses which are a great witness while a fundamentalist is out protesting, street preaching, or just walking around the neighborhood.
Let your light so shine!
You can keep your liberal CD’s full of CCM music and liberal preaching far away from fundamentalists. Yes, sir, fundy churches are still in the business of churning out cassette tapes in the ubiquitous “tape ministry” that graces the back table of many an Independent Baptist sanctuary.
As the preacher breathed the last “amen” (pronounced “ay-men” or sometimes “hay-men” but never “ah-men”) the tape ministry crew spring into action, preserving the service on cassettes so that all may enjoy the sounds of of the speaker’s breathing and stomach rumbling.
These tapes are often also sent to foreign missionaries as a ministry of encouragement, for nothing warms the cockles of a missionary’s heart like yet another sermon on sin and the many reason why the speaker is against it. This is assured to be more refreshing to a missionary than a raise in support and a month of vacation.
Salt and light on magnetic tape. Isn’t technology amazing?