SUITS, SUITS ME?

[myotch]

I'm on a job search - and I am sartorially challenged at the moment.

Clothing is on my radar, as are sales in this economy.

[Tiarali]

There was a spammer post before Myotch but it's gone now. I'd thought he was one-upping the spammer.

[JeseC]

My top memory of suits:

One of my friends was rebuked for borrowing a suit-coat from a friend before getting up on the platform to speak. Unbeknownst to the person speaking, this kid's family barely had enough money to keep them all fed and clothed. He didn't own a coat.

[CoveredBYGrace]

I agree with Papa Bear, completely, and pastor's wife, personally.

Completely, because our focus is to be on God, worshipping Him and loving/fellowshipping with His people, and if I am in an outfit that causes me grief, I cannot focus on anything or anyone but myself.

Personally, I like to dress up in something nicer than my everyday wear to go "the Lord's house"...Not always, though. Sometimes my spirit is in a place where dressing up isn't a priority.

And as such, it is a huge mistake to judge a person's spirituality or level of engagement, based upon attire. It's little more than Spiritual Bullying from the pulpit and the pews. How can a person catch a break these days?!

[Historian]

I've always appreciated the Singaporian take on suits. If you've ever read about their history, when they decided to pull themselves up by their own bootstraps and make themselves into an economic success and a powerhouse of productivity, one of the issues they faced was their climate. They decided to aggressively air condition, on the theory that nations in similar climates that did not are lazy and unproductive, in part because you just can't function well in that kind of heat. After living for a few years in South China, I get their point. Nothing is air conditioned. From April to November, from 10am to 5pm, no one did anything. Just sort of existed, trying not to waste any energy. Trying to teach a class of 50 students crammed into one small room so tightly they are all touching, when it's 105 and the humidty is at maximum and there is only one ceiling fan...I think I can safely say no one learned anything at all.

Anyway...diverting...back to suits.

So their leader's take on suits is that they were a Western convention which Singaporeans ought to do away with. He pointed out that the suit was invented as proper business attire by the cultures that really invented modern business: mostly Northern European. Northern Europe is cold, rainy and dark. As Scrooge says to Bob Cratchit (in the 1984 movie adaptation, not the original), after pointing out his shirt, tie, waistcoat and coat: "These are garments, Mr. Cratchit. Garments were invented by the human race as a protection against the cold. Once purchased, they may be used indefinitely for the purpose for which they are intended." Accordingly the Singaporean leader shunned the suit in favor of more weather appropriate attire, without the slightest shame.

The suit makes perfect sense in Northern Europe, and much of North America. It makes no sense at all in Southeast Asia, large parts of Africa and South American or much of the Southern USA. It is nothing more than an a-moral convention to which people have become deeply attached, as we all tend to do with conventions and habits (though we're all amazingly good at condemning such attachments in other people...just look at what I just wrote!). Every time I see a man in a suit in church in Florida or Georgia, I think it's silly. Especially because they then have to air condition the church to 65 degrees so the men won't all pass out, spending ridiculous amounts of money on energy costs and leaving the women in their short sleeves and sun dresses chattering and fighting over blankets.

[myotch]

I should go to Singapore and sell seersuckers.

JaB: I bought 3 ties. Awesome, awesome ties. I love ties.

5 years wearing black graphic tees and blue jeans because I thought my customers expected a creative to dress in black, graphic tees, and jeans. Then to realize, I clean up nice.

[seenthelight]

I think it is what people are comfortable wearing. People should be comfortable going to church and not going for a fashion show. If a church makes people feel guilt about what they are wearing, I would move on. If your church is a suit-church and you are okay financially with a suit and you like wearing a suit, then go for it. It seems that people don't want others being comfortable at church b/c if you are comfortable you might enjoy it and if you enjoy it, you are not being convicted of some sin!

At our ex-church, very fundy, a woman was approached by a deacon with "you must be a visitor b/c women here wear dresses"---she left. That just doesn't work for me. I feel if there is a dress code for a church, it should be stated somewhere so people know what is expected. "No tie. No suit. No service." Sounds silly but with the varying apparel accepted in churches, it would be nice for visitors to know what people normally wear. If I was new to a community and found out a church was a suit-church, I wouldn't go there. It would save me some time!

If you are tired of suits, don't wear it. You will see for real what your church thinks is important---the fact that you showed up or what you were wearing.

[Jenni]

This whole dress code issue was a big part of my decision to leave Fundyism behind. When I was teaching on Guam, during my 5th year I finally met my first person who was not 1) a church member or 2) a school parent. Five years in. And she claimed to be some flavor of Christian, although obviously not the Fundy Kool-Aid flavor. Anyway, we all invited her to church and she came b/c she didn't know many other people on the island ...

She was dressed nicely in dress slacks and a blouse. I was wearing the first random skirt I found in my closet, since I couldn't afford to have "church clothes" and "teaching clothes" separate. She had taken the time to dress up and look nice for church. I had rolled out of bed and into my skirt, since Sundays, to me, were just another workday at the same place where I taught Monday-Friday.

She survived the service just fine, but mentioned afterwards that several people had been looking at her funny, and that she felt like she had been judged for wearing pants. She was glad to have met us all, but would not be coming back to a service again.

I decided then and there that if the church I was in made people feel unwelcome because of their clothing, I needed to leave. Soon.

Later today, when I go to church, I'll probably be wearing jeans and a polo shirt. I could dress up; some people at my church do, but they don't really care what we wear. I've often come in my Target shirt and khakis, or just put on whatever's clean.

[UnePetite]

It makes me sick to think of the dress code at my old fundy church. My mom, to this day, is sickened by the thought of the pastor's wife "herding" she and all the other women into a Sunday School class during an evening service, teaching them about modesty. As I remember, no one could have been considered immodest - by a long shot.

I would *never* bring any of my school friends to church with me because it was such a restrictive environment, ESPECIALLY because of the dress code. Fortunately, I never saw a cullotte until attending the WILDS, but what unsaved teenager has a pair of knee-length shorts or gives a crap about making sure their top doesn't go below the collar bone? Thinking of all that now makes me incredibly uncomfortable.

In college (state university), I began attending a fundy church. On Wednesdays, I would go to class, babysit, and then go straight to church for orchestra rehearsal and then the service. I should have been able to show up in jeans - but no, I had to change into a skirt because I went to church. I got a "talking to" by a church member because I wore a pair of nice pants one night; they were neither too tight nor immodest. I was told that I shouldn't wear pants. Honestly, I knew someone would say something to me, but I think by that point I just didn't care anymore.

It wasn't long after that I left funamentalism. That type of legalism is exactly why Jesus criticized the Pharisees.

[JeseC]

When I got out of fundamentalism I had a dress that I'd call my "slut dress". It had spaghetti straps and hit about an inch above the knee.