Carrying Guilt

[Mommy2Kids]

(04-28-2012 09:15 AM)elfdream Wrote:  Someone said that most of our problems stem from the fact that we are comparing our 'behind the scenes footage with someone's highlight reel'.

I think this is close to it. I "know" no one is perfect, but I know several people who I think have their stuff together.

But there's also the part of me that is hypercritical of everyone and everything - just like my mother was. I literally white-knuckle not correcting people when I disagree or see that they did something half-assed. So as hard as I am on others, I am even more tough on myself.

[myotch]

Accepting the shortcomings of others is a great start to dealing with your own shortcomings. Live knowing you are forgiven - this is great. Live knowing you have been given grace - this is even greater.

[elfdream]

I remember being hypercritical. It mostly had to do with musical performances. Husband and I always were so picky about them it wasn't funny. We always thought people were too flat or sharp or that 'we could have done it better'. That sort of thinking stayed with us for a few years after we left the movement until we finally asked ourselves "WHY ARE WE DOING THIS?" All it was doing was making us unhappy. It wasn't affecting anything around us in the least. It was just somehow making us feel superior in our own minds which in the end is actually very silly. From then on we practiced 'just going with it' and now we've learned to be charitable and compassionate toward others until we reached the point where it was no longer an issue. That did not happen overnight though....it took time.