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ElizabethCovedale · 03-23-2012, 05:49 AM

Ok, so the last thread turned into a big fight....

Here's the question. A woman is dating a man who is divorced. The divorce was both parties agreeing that they couldn't work things out (not that she divorced him against his will or that there was any adultery involved). So, is he required to now stay single after the divorce? Is it wrong for her to marry him.

Shoes · 03-23-2012, 06:47 AM

i think it's a non-issue. Live and let live.

**JordanMaria** · 03-23-2012, 09:57 AM

I'd like to know why you are asking this question.

Is this your personal situation and you're looking for advice?

Is this a friend of yours and you want to give advice?

If it's you and you're trying to jusitfy something you don't believe in, I wouldn't do it no matter what anyone says, if you go against your conscience and your own beliefs, you're going to regret it. Whatever you do, stay true to yourself.

If it's a friend, I'd be there just to support her no matter what they do.

Not everything in life is black and white.

**Sharon** · 03-23-2012, 10:12 AM

Building off what JordanMaria said. . .

If she's unwilling to consider marrying him, she probably shouldn't be dating him.

***Darrell*** · (This post was last modified: 03-23-2012 10:24 AM by Darrell.)

I think we start from where we are not where we wish we were. If grace, mercy and forgiveness cannot cover divorce then what is it there for?

We live in a broken world where nothing is optimal. Nothing works like it should including our closest relationships. We struggle on anyway.

That being said, at some point these people need to have a conversation about why his last marriage didn't work out. There are lessons to be learned there both about future pitfalls and about the growth and maturity of the people involved.

ElizabethCovedale · 03-23-2012, 02:25 PM

This is not me. An older lady, widowed, asked me what I thought, as she is dating a divorced man. She has said she doesn't want to get remarried, but she has asked this question several times over the past few months whether she would be living in adultery if she married a divorced man. I don't know what to say. Were she to get married I would certainly support her decision. I guess it's hard to discern the "this is what I've always been told" with what the Bible actually teaches. It is sometimes hard to read the Bible without all the pre-conceived ideas of what passages mean.

**Qrayze** · 03-25-2012, 06:18 PM

This is my new way of looking at things: if what the Bible says about something is the ONLY reason to or not do something, then I ignore it. The Bible is not my diety and it is filled with errors.

JeseC · 12-03-2012, 01:08 PM

I sort of wonder though...if we truly say "til death do us part", does that mean anything? If we consider marriage to be a vow, it is perhaps rather a matter of whether divorce is truly allowable. Or to put it another way, whether it is truly possible for human beings to declare such a vow over?

~~Persnickety Polecat~~ · (This post was last modified: 12-03-2012 02:04 PM by Persnickety Polecat.)

(12-03-2012 01:08 PM)JeseC Wrote: I sort of wonder though...if we truly say "til death do us part", does that mean anything? If we consider marriage to be a vow, it is perhaps rather a matter of whether divorce is truly allowable. Or to put it another way, whether it is truly possible for human beings to declare such a vow over?

I would say it is up to each individual couple. There are things that I can live with that another woman might personally find intolerable while another woman might shrug off what I would find unforgivable.

(And I'd consider it "death of the relationship," personally. ymmv.)

Chuck Norris · 12-05-2012, 05:13 PM

(03-23-2012 05:49 AM)ElizabethCovedale Wrote: Ok, so the last thread turned into a big fight....

Here's the question. A woman is dating a man who is divorced. The divorce was both parties agreeing that they couldn't work things out (not that she divorced him against his will or that there was any adultery involved). So, is he required to now stay single after the divorce? Is it wrong for her to marry him.

I personally think it has to do with your view of the Bible. If you base everything on only what the bible says, he can remarry if she does. If you base it on a grace relationship to God, he is free to remarry.