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~~Persnickety Polecat~~ · (This post was last modified: 02-17-2012 10:40 AM by Persnickety Polecat.)

(02-16-2012 04:19 PM)FundoNoMo Wrote: Well, for Valentine's Day my wonderful wife got her nose pierced for me. I always thought that she would look really cute with one (and I was right) and she finally got it done this past Sunday. It looks very feminine and cute and really compliments her.

I'm 37 and she's 35. We've been married 15 years. We started a church here in Oregon (NOT IFB) and have been here for over 11 years. We have three kids (7, 9, 11) and we have built our own house, own three cars and have been completely financially independent for the last 15 years. Looks like this would be no big deal for two grown, thinking adults who have managed through life fairly well...BUT...

My wife's fundy parents are 'very disappointed' in their daughter and are concerned that she has forsaken their legacy. They have poured on the guilt and told her that they have seen a pattern of rebellion in her and fear that she may get a (gasp) tattoo next (she wouldn't simply because of the pain I'm guessing). Her dad is nearly obsessed with what people are going to think of him when people in their church see her. He is not genuinely concerned about her, but about his reputation as an IFB pastor. It is very disturbing.

I'm so very removed from this way of thinking that it just blows me away when I see it first hand. Especially when I know my wife and know that she loves Jesus and loves her family and her friends and neighbors. I'm not sure if there is a better legacy to leave than that, yet they are so weirdly concerned with what their so-called 'church family' will think of them when they see their daughter w/ a nose piercing (stud, not even a ring). It just seems to me that if that movement was full of genuine love for each other that silly things like that would never be an issue. It's just really sad.

I'm not expecting any response. It just felt good to rant.

Aw, I'm sorry. I had my tragus done many years ago (it's not nearly as racy as it sounds), and my mom hit the roof (I also had some pretty salacious ones at the time, but thankfully she couldn't see those, lol). Thing is, if that's the worst thin that your wife does, what's the problem? You're law-abiding people. You are happily married, you are productive citizens, and you're living a decent, moral life. So she's got a piercing. Who cares? Who does it hurt? How does it affect anything? She's still the same person she has always, always been. Just a bit more glittery. Smile

And I bet she looks adorable.

BTW, tats don't hurt nearly as bad as people think.

Elijah Craig · (This post was last modified: 02-17-2012 10:49 AM by Elijah Craig.)

(02-16-2012 05:38 PM)redbeardiam Wrote: Her parents would disapprove, but not because they're fundy... just cause they're a little uppity.

This. It's a little different since my grandfather died, but in general we weren't "allowed" to do certain things like get tattoos or have long hair (boys) or piercings (except earrings for girls). And for the record, that side of the family is actually very healthy and accepting of each other and our faults. It had nothing to do with religion. It was just that we had a family name to uphold. There wouldn't have been anyone throwing a fit and nobody would be shunned. We'd have just felt ashamed.

And I think that's how the rule worked; if there was drama then natural rebellion would kick in and we'd do it to show them who was boss. But the family dynamic wasn't like that. I think there's a way to do that without getting all wierd and judgmental about it.

I personally have no tattoos or piercings and no desire to get one. I don't find them attractive on girls. But they're very common any more so it's just not something I get worked up about.

lucrezaborgia · 02-17-2012, 12:53 PM

You aren't a proper lady in India without a nose piercing.

Darcy · 02-17-2012, 04:27 PM

I got mine pierced on Thanksgiving. I'm 28. Wink

I love it! My dad freaked out (we were staying with them for the holiday). My husband and daughters think it's great. My daughter often goes to school with a fake gem stuck to her nose because she wants a nose stud (she's 5). So I guess I'm corrupting her. Tongue

bean · 02-17-2012, 05:28 PM

I think nose piercings are very cool.

No tattoo for me. Mostly because I don't know what to get.

But more power to those who do.

~~Persnickety Polecat~~ · 02-17-2012, 05:40 PM

(02-17-2012 04:27 PM)Darcy Wrote: I got mine pierced on Thanksgiving. I'm 28. I love it! My dad freaked out (we were staying with them for the holiday). My husband and daughters think it's great. My daughter often goes to school with a fake gem stuck to her nose because she wants a nose stud (she's 5). So I guess I'm corrupting her.

That's a running gag around here, too. My 6 year old has a thing for Tool and NIN. My husband blames me. Um ... well ... it's not that I listen to any of that around him (the lyrics are, shall we say, less than child-friendly), but I certainly listened to it while he was in utero. So, sure, guilty as charged, I suppose. And that same 6 year old also loves my body art and wants me to get this hair.

My next project is to have my rook pierced. I just have to decide if I want it on the same side as my pierced tragus or the opposite side.

co_heir · 02-17-2012, 09:01 PM

It's great that she felt free to get her nose pierced. It's a shame that folks can't see that she's still the same person, just with a new accessory Smile

I don't think my wife would ever get her nose pierced. Just not her style, and that's cool. We're not exactly spring chickens, so it might look a wee bit out of place. I do tease her every once in a while about being the only one in the family without a tattoo. Big Grin

**WifeofBill** · 02-17-2012, 09:23 PM

(02-17-2012 05:40 PM)Persnickety Polecat Wrote:
(02-17-2012 04:27 PM)Darcy Wrote: I got mine pierced on Thanksgiving. I'm 28. I love it! My dad freaked out (we were staying with them for the holiday). My husband and daughters think it's great. My daughter often goes to school with a fake gem stuck to her nose because she wants a nose stud (she's 5). So I guess I'm corrupting her.

That's a running gag around here, too. My 6 year old has a thing for Tool and NIN. My husband blames me. Um ... well ... it's not that I listen to any of that around him (the lyrics are, shall we say, less than child-friendly), but I certainly listened to it while he was in utero. So, sure, guilty as charged, I suppose. And that same 6 year old also loves my body art and wants me to get this hair.

My next project is to have my rook pierced. I just have to decide if I want it on the same side as my pierced tragus or the opposite side.

I want to do that to my daughters hair for the babies first birthday. We are doing an over the rainbow themed party, I would love it if my older daughter would let me do this.