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Master_Of_Irony · 12-01-2011, 03:17 AM

Like an earlier post said, the "Christmas Present to Jesus" always made me laugh a little. Not the concept. but the fact that each of the pastor's kids then had a new laptop that year.

**mirandaluzdivina** · 12-01-2011, 07:48 AM

At school, we did a live Nativity, and it was just ridiculous, like they took the money a normal school might spend on a prom, and bought elaborate sets, props, and costumes for the Nativity. The cast was elected by the students, like some sort of fundy homecoming court. When I was a senior, it was well known that I wanted nothing to do with any of this, so of course everyone voted for me to play Mary. The weekend before Christmas, I had to ride side-saddle on a real live donkey down the long driveway that led up to the church parking lot. "Joseph," played by a fellow reluctant rebel, didn't realize he was supposed to help me dismount, so when I did, I tripped on the hem of my robe, my pillow "baby bump" fell out, and I sprained my wrist and broke my pinky trying to break my fall. But I was a trooper, and finished the play (complete with a screaming Baby Jesus, who apparently sensed that I do not like babies) before going to the ER. I think my dad still has the video, though I've tried to arrange for him to "accidentally" tape over it.

Tonx · 12-01-2011, 01:09 PM

Did anyone else get really jealous of the girl who got to play Mary? My whole life, I was ALWAYS, ALWAYS cast as the angel. Type cast at age 8. Woe is me...

**mirandaluzdivina** · 12-01-2011, 01:33 PM

(12-01-2011 01:09 PM)Tonx Wrote: Did anyone else get really jealous of the girl who got to play Mary? My whole life, I was ALWAYS, ALWAYS cast as the angel. Type cast at age 8. Woe is me...

When I was little, I always wanted to be an angel! I really just liked the wings, I think. But to prove fundies haven't cornered the market on insensitivity, one of the nuns at school said I "didn't look like an angel" (I'm Italian/Puerto Rican). Maybe that's why I bleach my hair now!

notdrinkingthekoolaid · 12-01-2011, 03:33 PM

I can top ALLLLL Ya'll...

Ready for it....

I was baby Jesus!! Big Grin

True story...I was about 5 months old on my first Christmas. My oldest sister was 11 1/2 at the time and cast as Mary. So I got to be a real live baby Jesus/prop. Big Grin

**Perry** · 12-01-2011, 10:14 PM

My fundy church didn't give the angels wings because "that's not in the King James Bible". Then they'd start ranting about KJVO.

Strangly Warmed · 12-02-2011, 12:54 AM

After I left the Baptist church, I took my girlfriend (now my wife ) to the Baptist church I grew up in to see my siblings in their program. It was bad. The backdrop was a flannel graf background with red light at the top of a mountain. It looked like Jesus was born
In front of a volcano.

When Mary (the pastors daughter showed up, I leaned over to my gf and whispered, "see the Virgin Mary? She isn't". I thought Amy was going to fall put of the pew.

The angel was a young women with cross your heart garland, accentuating her bosoms.

Then the program ended with a couple of girls playing violins, which sounded more like cats being killed.

**Sharon** · 12-02-2011, 07:56 AM

One year, my dad 'got a conviction' that we shouldn't ought to have a Christmas tree, because people treat them as idols.

I bought a 6" tree with crafty battery-operated lights for my room. When my mom saw it, she had me place it in the living room in front of the picture window as if it were the family tree.

Dad got over that conviction with a good spirit, and we upgraded the tree.

Tonx · 12-02-2011, 12:23 PM

(12-01-2011 01:33 PM)mirandaluzdivina Wrote:
(12-01-2011 01:09 PM)Tonx Wrote: Did anyone else get really jealous of the girl who got to play Mary? My whole life, I was ALWAYS, ALWAYS cast as the angel. Type cast at age 8. Woe is me...

When I was little, I always wanted to be an angel! I really just liked the wings, I think. But to prove fundies haven't cornered the market on insensitivity, one of the nuns at school said I "didn't look like an angel" (I'm Italian/Puerto Rican). Maybe that's why I bleach my hair now!

Oh wow, ouch!

If it makes you feel better, wings aren't all they're cracked up to be. I got the wings from my cousin in a box of used Halloween costumes, and the poor wings were so battered and abused, more and more tinsel would fall off of them every year. Yeah, I was a pretty sorry looking angel.

Tonx · 12-02-2011, 12:26 PM

(12-01-2011 03:33 PM)notdrinkingthekoolaid Wrote: I can top ALLLLL Ya'll...

Ready for it....

I was baby Jesus!!

True story...I was about 5 months old on my first Christmas. My oldest sister was 11 1/2 at the time and cast as Mary. So I got to be a real live baby Jesus/prop.

Emoticons fail me...