Rules, Rules, Rules

[Jenni]

http://frenchizal.blogspot.com/2011/06/s...oulda.html

[Presbygirl]

That was great Jenni. Natural consequences often teach children best. Admittedly, I often parent out of convenience instead. Phrases like "because Mommy wants you to" or "please just do what I am asking" are not far from my lips. Instead, many times it is better to let the children make a mess, or actively participate in a chore with me even though it will "slow me down" because the hands on learning is so valuable and a part of "living in community" in our family.
That was a good reminder for me.

[pastor's wife]

I enjoyed reading that.

Quote: Often times it seems that we convince ourselves that rules will protect us from everything and that the best solution to a possible difficulty is just a list of rules forbidding an activity or anything associated with it.

It does seem that many times Christians are trying to find a program for life that will guarantee them a problem-free existance: "If I only do x,y,x and avoid p,q,r, then nothing bad will happen to me." It's silly and sad and stifling.

While there are specific sins we avoid as clearly stated in Scripture, so much of life is open to our freedom and then when things don't work out, we are offered grace.

[JordanMaria]

(06-15-2011 05:58 PM)pastors wife Wrote:  It does seem that many times Christians are trying to find a program for life that will guarantee them a problem-free existance: "If I only do x,y,x and avoid p,q,r, then nothing bad will happen to me." It's silly and sad and stifling.

This is one of those things my mother has a huge problem with. She was constantly trying to line my life with rules so heaven forbid I made a mistake. She believes knowing the rules = you won't do anything wrong. She was really shaken when she had found out I had lost my virginity. She constantly said she didn't understand how someone who know what was right could do something wrong. I told her that we're all human. We make mistakes and knowing what's right from wrong doesn't guarantee we will do the right thing. This happened years ago and to this day she disagrees with me and will STILL bring up how offended she was at my behavior. She's even told me that if she loses faith, it will have been all my fault.

[LearningFreedom]

Excellent Jenni!!!! Very good insight and well-put. I've been thinking along the exact same lines the last few days.

But you presented it so well... may I borrow it for my blog? I will give you the credit and link to you, but rather than re-word what you have so masterfully composed, I could just point them to your blog. I will wait for your permission before I do so.

[Jenni]

LearningFreedom, you may certainly borrow my post for your blog, and I do appreciate your asking permission first. I always enjoy extra blog traffic when I can get it. Any chance you can PM me a link to your blog so I can check it out?

[paul]

I have to say, this was a good post. It also reminded me of when I was a kid. As an only child with young parents (18 & 19 when I was born), I had to entertain myself on Saturday mornings. Well, when I was a kid, Bugs and company were a lot of entertainment, so cartoons were the order of the morning. This, however, left the belly empty. So, when I was old enough, I would scrounge for food(1). Often I found the pickle jar to keep me company watching cartoons.

I loved pickles and the juice. We were "good" Southern Baptist at the time, so we didn't drink, but for some reason, we had a shot glass or two. I would get a shot glass of pickles and a "big" glass of water. I'd drink the pickle juice and have a water chaser. My mom didn't find it as funny as I did.

This is to say nothing of the experience with the bottle of green olives on a hot summer day and the redecoration of Pizza Hut that followed that experience. Yuck!

(1) - Just to clarify, my folks would have gotten up to fix for me, I just was a bit independent and didn't wake them. I figured I could take care of it myself and let them rest.

[Jenni]

That made me smile, Paul. Pickle juice shots - ew.

[LearningFreedom]

(06-16-2011 10:14 AM)Jenni Wrote:  LearningFreedom, you may certainly borrow my post for your blog, and I do appreciate your asking permission first. I always enjoy extra blog traffic when I can get it. Any chance you can PM me a link to your blog so I can check it out?

no problem... do with it what you will. I haven't posted there since october, but I have several posts in the workings that will be going up in the next few days. Hopefully, yours will be one of them!

http://radicallyfreeyou.blogspot.com

[Innocent Lamb]

Great post! As a teacher, I hope that I am teaching my students to think and make decisions, not just follow a ridiculous list of rules with no good explanation. It's only human nature to wonder WHY a certain rule is in place, especially if it seems particularly arbitrary and pointless. Also, it's human nature (especially true of children and adolescents) to be even MORE enticed by things that are strictly forbidden. We wonder what the big deal is.

Personally, my parents are tee-totalers, and my mom is particularly very anti-alcohol. It stems, I think, from her growing up next door to an alcoholic uncle. However, her strict NO ALCOHOL rules and harsh judgement of anyone who MIGHT have ever taken a drank just annoyed me more than anything. I had plenty of friends who had an occasional social drink who were not bad people and it made me angry that she labeled them all "alcoholics." Early on, I learned that alcohol can be harmful by seeing some other friends in college pass out, throw up, and make fools of themselves, and when I had to intervene and possibly save their lives by driving them home. That taught me that I do not ever want to be DRUNK, but that I am capable of enjoying a cocktail occasionally and remaining in control. I learned to make my own decisions wisely, which I did not learn from the strict angry NO ALCOHOL EVER message.

I think this is why my ex makes such poor life choices. He knows only how to follow or break rules, but not how to make rational decisions.