Swimming Modestly

[JordanMaria]

(04-10-2012 02:04 PM)redhot Wrote:  Fundy's always say this: Would you want someone looking at your wife/daughter/sister that way?

My bf's response would be something along the lines of "Hell yes, look at the woman I get to sleep with and all of you suckers don't!"

[Bob M]

(04-10-2012 03:32 PM)lucrezaborgia Wrote:  

(04-10-2012 02:23 PM)amyrose5 Wrote:  Hey...lucrezia...where are you? You started this, now I'm being corrected, informed, and irritating everyone....get over here already!

Quick, someone photoshop me a bat-signal!

Anywho...

Bob, that wasn't the first time you mentioned that comment in this forum. Neither post came off as sarcastic in any way. If anything, I've yet to see a single post so far where you seem to be sarcastic but of course I don't read everything. You don't seem to be misogynistic or patriarchal but I think a lot of times we tend to continue on in that thinking style without even realizing that we are doing it.

Be careful of Poe's Law otherwise your comment now about being sarcastic comes off as a really bad effort at damage control. A woman or man could be walking down the street completely naked and still deserve the same amount of respect as someone in a burka. Like someone else stated in this thread, it's not clothing that makes someone modest.

The only reason I don't wear a string bikini is that I don't feel comfortable in one. Not because of how I look but because when you have large breasts most bikini tops don't have proper support and I don't like having to constantly readjust the bottoms all the damn time because of my body shape. Not having to shave certain areas before bathing is also nice.

I came here as an ex-fundy. Much of what I have read here is directed toward pointing out the flaws in their system. That colors almost everything I say here. With that said, you can now interpret everything I say correctly. Geez.

[lucrezaborgia]

Oh, you'd be surprised sometimes who posts what.

[Bob M]

(04-10-2012 11:05 PM)lucrezaborgia Wrote:  Oh, you'd be surprised sometimes who posts what.

I guess I will learn. I try with all my might not to be misogynistic or paternalistic. I am fairly egalitarian, and that is hard being in the church I am in.

[lucrezaborgia]

Darrell can we have a sarcasm font? :-P

[Bob M]

(04-10-2012 11:12 PM)lucrezaborgia Wrote:  Darrell can we have a sarcasm font? :-P

What color, Green?

[Tiarali]

I always heard it said like, "would you like it if someone talked about your wife/sister/mother that way?" or whatever. And I always thought it was just trying to make people realise that that stranger on the beach or on the street is a real person, and you should respect them just as you would want the people in your life respected.

Not that women belong to a man, but just remember that strangers are people too. That said, I understand that many fundies do teach/believe/act as though women belong to a man, and there are many horrible patriarchal issues that need to be dealt with.

[amyrose5]

(04-11-2012 03:36 AM)tiarali Wrote:  I always heard it said like, "would you like it if someone talked about your wife/sister/mother that way?" or whatever. And I always thought it was just trying to make people realise that that stranger on the beach or on the street is a real person, and you should respect them just as you would want the people in your life respected.

Not that women belong to a man, but just remember that strangers are people too. That said, I understand that many fundies do teach/believe/act as though women belong to a man, and there are many horrible patriarchal issues that need to be dealt with.

But if it were just to point out the person's humanity, why do fundies never get worried about how they talk about someone's husband/brother/son/father? That's my problem with it. Men are never identified and defined by their relationships to others, male or female, in the same way that women are.

[Presbygirl]

(04-11-2012 09:24 AM)amyrose5 Wrote:  

(04-11-2012 03:36 AM)tiarali Wrote:  I always heard it said like, "would you like it if someone talked about your wife/sister/mother that way?" or whatever. And I always thought it was just trying to make people realise that that stranger on the beach or on the street is a real person, and you should respect them just as you would want the people in your life respected.

Not that women belong to a man, but just remember that strangers are people too. That said, I understand that many fundies do teach/believe/act as though women belong to a man, and there are many horrible patriarchal issues that need to be dealt with.

But if it were just to point out the person's humanity, why do fundies never get worried about how they talk about someone's husband/brother/son/father? That's my problem with it. Men are never identified and defined by their relationships to others, male or female, in the same way that women are.

Could it be an issue of respect? Real respect, not the fake kind as in the stuff referred to above where they refer to what if it was your mother/sister/daughter/etc... In Fundy land, men are "king." Period. Men aren't identified and defined by their relationships in that way because they may say whatever they want because it is all coming from them, THE MAN. Women are not valued at the same level. But it is even more sinister because Fundy men say all the right words about loving and leading their wives, but they treat them like trash inside their own four walls. Or sometimes outside them too. So, therefore I believe any sight of any other woman's flesh, excites them in a weird way because they do not have a proper respect for females period. They can't control other women and it makes them angry, and hungry for lust. They can't handle normal.

idk, if that makes any sense, Tiarali already said as much above.

[Bob M]

(04-11-2012 03:36 AM)tiarali Wrote:  I always heard it said like, "would you like it if someone talked about your wife/sister/mother that way?" or whatever. And I always thought it was just trying to make people realise that that stranger on the beach or on the street is a real person, and you should respect them just as you would want the people in your life respected.

Not that women belong to a man, but just remember that strangers are people too. That said, I understand that many fundies do teach/believe/act as though women belong to a man, and there are many horrible patriarchal issues that need to be dealt with.

That is how I always took it. For example, think of a girl or guy who stars in pornos. And someone says "That is someone's son." It would make me think of my son and how I would feel if he were in that degraded lifestyle. And if you think that porno stars do not live degraded lifestyles, what planet are you from?