longbottom leaf

[steviusthedevious]

this isn't so much a fundy memory, but this seems like the right place to drop it. after this, it seems a good time to bring up smoking. i had a friend which introduced me to the pleasures of tobacco during my sophomore at bju. i didn't smoke again until junior year when i realized my roommate was of the same inclination regarding the simple pleasures of life. the summer after junior year, i was still on-campus taking classes and working - i kept some tobacco and a pipe under my bed (bottom of the double bunk was over a compartment which was used for storage). my senior year, i lived off-campus and developed a fondness for tobacco to a further extent. very few people know that i smoke - my 'cool' sister (she drinks wine, so she doesn't care that much), a few friends, and my fiancée-wife. i had planned to tell my parents last christmas, and that didn't happen. i planned to tell them this christmas, and that really didn't happen either. personally, i think cigarettes are a little trashy (unless hand-rolled), and cigars are too pricey for me at this point in life. i smoke about 3-8 times a month depending on what i feel like, so i'm not really dependent on the notion. should i 'come out' to my parents directly, passive-aggressively post suggestive references on facebook, or just let it go as is? i know my parents wouldn't approve, but i think we're at a point in our relationship where they wouldn't disown me ... one would hope at least

anyone gone through something similar? any thoughts on smoking, extraneous remarks, favorite practices regarding the hobby? snide remarks welcome also

[Phatchick]

You might not like my thoughts on the subject. IMNSHO, tobacco is a filthy habit. The Bear smokes and I truly wish he'd quit.

[Lizzy F.]

I personally hate cigarettes. And I don't tend to hang around people who smoke because it gets into my clothes.

But if you only do it 3-8 times a month and it's quality stuff (none of that ashy-chemically grit that'll give you lung cancer) then I don't think I've have a problem with it.

If you don't live with your parents, then you don't have to explain it to them. Personally, I wouldn't cross that bridge until your parents bring it up to you. You could post a pic of yourself with your pipe on facebook if you want, but I wouldn't do it just to let your parents know that you're smoking. It seems to be baiting them and I don't think that's fair.


Note: My parents used kerosene heaters for years without getting them serviced and there was so much smoke it would stain the walls. I'd cough up black goo on a lot of mornings. Yoga breathing exercises cleared it all out and I haven't had any bad affects. So, there are ways of clearing out your lungs and keeping them healthy.

[steviusthedevious]

(01-07-2011 12:57 AM)Lizzy F. Wrote:  But if you only do it 3-8 times a month and it's quality stuff (none of that ashy-chemically grit that'll give you lung cancer) then I don't think I've have a problem with it.

If you don't live with your parents, then you don't have to explain it to them. Personally, I wouldn't cross that bridge until your parents bring it up to you. You could post a pic of yourself with your pipe on facebook if you want, but I wouldn't do it just to let your parents know that you're smoking. It seems to be baiting them and I don't think that's fair.

oh, it's quality that does make sense though; i'm just stuck on whether it's an issue of respect to let them know i do it, or is it a non-issue at this point. i don't do it often enough that it's unhealthy to a great extent, and it's not habit-forming for me.

[JohnDced]

Not that I'm IFB or close to it but IMO why tell them? They may have many non habit forming things that they do they'd prefer you not know about. I agree with Lizzy (and suspect they may already know and just aren't comfortable/bothered enough to have the discussion).

[The Chef]

I'm pretty similar. My brothers decided to start smoking cigars (except my brother-in-law who has been to Turkey and goes for the hookas). I thought I'd try a cigar just so I know first hand what they saw in it. Good! So I smoke a cigarello about 2-3 times a month. (Cigars are too big for me, and cigarettes are disgusting).

I haven't told anyone. I just do what I do. There's no sense making a big deal of it, at least for me. I feel like if I talk to my parents about it formally, some kind of announcement, that just complicates things. It makes them think they have to make a formal reply of some kind. I've figured it was better to just live my life, let them see I'm the same person who still loves them and loves the Lord, but who happens to enjoy tobacco once in a while.