from their website:
Example message: “Good evening, this short message is to tell you that we care about you. If you would like more information, press 1. If you want to leave a message, press 2. If you would like us to take your name off the list, press 9.â€
Example responses:
#1 – slam buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
#2 – “Yeah, right! Visa cares about me, too, every time they interrupt my dinner with a lamebrain automated call!” slam buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
#3 – “Sure, I’d like to leave a message! ” (presses 2) “+-%^%$^@%%@$” slam buzzzzzzz (hopefully the automated system atomatically deletes profanity)
#4 – (presses 9, presses 9, presses 9…)
#5 – Dials number of Christian coworker. “Hey, Bob, about going to church with you Sunday…I think I’ll pass.” click buzzzzzzzz
It respects the laws and regulations of all countries by following the “DO NOT CALL LIST†and observes all other phone etiquette.
If you are making unsolicited calls you are *by definition* not following *any* phone etiquette! My hatred of telemarketers (and yes, this is telemarketing!) is surpassed *only* by my hatred of door-to-door solicitors (and yes, knocking on doors for your church counts here).
Fundy churches could pay for it with individual church members signing up to pay hour per hour, and they could count it as soul winning on their merit score sheets!
The old Paths song used to say,
“Jesus freaks out in the street
Handing tickets out for God”
Technology has made the obnoxious sandwichboard, sign carrying Westboro wanna be obsolete.
Now you can Market god just like a spiritual credit card..
For $3.99 per minute you can have JOY help you generate a whole new list of customers for “Personal” followup.
Before agreeing to work with you, we will let you know how much God has supplied to reach your area.
Oh we see your area code has only 24 phone calls allotted. For an additional sum of $500 dollars we can make 6000 calls available to you if you act now. If you call in the next ten minutes we will inclued a gross of the Lord’s Prayer Secret Crosses. All you pay is separate shipping and handling…..” yadda yadda yadda….
When I was ordained to the ministry back in 1996, my pastor wanted to give me a special gift as “I tried to win the world for Jesus” (IFB missions). A slightly used and abused auto-dialer with a self-recorded message! I’m glad he forgot all about it when I moved to my “mission field”. A really great ice-breaker for ministry. Let’s see how many people you can p-o in just one week.
YES! Pairing (some of) the most obnoxious people with THE most annoying technology! My day is now complete, and whole, and lovely. The worst thing about autodialers with multiple lines, is that each line often carries its own, separate phone number, making blocking their calls to your cell nearly impossible. Putting your cell on the do not call list is often a futile effort as well.
@Don- please specify children’s or adult size on that fabulous Lord’s Prayer cross necklace. And speaking of sandwich board people, does anyone know whatever happened to the Shriner guy who used to sit out in front of BJU? He added a unique charm to the front gate.
He’s got to be deceased by now. Pity the man. He was the victim of wacko psycho-surgery in the early 1950s. He suffered a “nervous breakdown,” and was talked into (or committed into) a frontal lobotomy back when they were supposed to be the cure for mental illness. Needless to say, it destroyed his life.
@Bass- the last time I was in the area, I noticed he was gone. Didn’t know if maybe he had moved elsewhere or was even still alive. Yours is the most real information I’ve heard about him. Every time I asked anyone on campus about him, they acted as though I was asking about some deep, dark campus secret.
I love the sidebar, “because reap in joy ministry is a by faith ministry, your support is vital. Without it we will not be able to reach the lost for Christ.” um, yeah. Okey dokey, then.
I want a soda pop and my dinner out. Guess I’ll spend the $21.50 that could have gone to “Reap In Joy Ministry”. End of the fundy guilt trip and manipulation. Now for a good night’s sleep.
@beth – The story goes that “the shriner” had been part of the set design crew, but I never got that straight. My impression from whoever told me (25 years ago), was that he was not actually a regular BJU staff member but more of a person they hired for specific work. (Remember, this would have been back in the heydey of BJU Films). I could be wrong — but as far as I was told, he’d had some actual connection to the school, but not an exceptionally strong one. After the failed surgery (or surgeries), his parents cared for him, and then other family members did.
Again, I feel bad for him. He grew up in an authoritarian society that subjected him to a cruel surgical procedure, and when it destroyed him, he was simply turned loose. I’m glad he had a family that helped him, and I’m glad that he lived in a peaceful community that, overall, didn’t harm him. BJU would never have allowed anybody from the campus to harass him, and I’m glad of that. I worked on Security during my time at BJU, back when girls worked in the front gatehouse (and maybe they do again—I don’t know), and I did see some faculty members greet him and try to be kind to him.
@Richard Sullivan- there was a church that my dad made me attend for a short time that had one of those and so everyone in the little city got a phone call at Christmas Eve and New Years Eve from that church with a message from the pastor, they also played digital church bells very early every Sunday morning.
“It’s the same logic that says we can knock on doors where there are No Soliciting signs because “we’re not selling anything.—
LOL, yeah, we have a sign at our house that they ignore and they give that exact response. Our response, is yes, you’re selling God. They don’t really appreciate that, but oh well.
Every character in any Christian book or movie must act like a Christian. Even the murdering, raping, and pillaging villains must never be seen to curse or fornicate. […]
Anything can be rationalized if you claim that doing otherwise will cause souls to end up in hell (no matter how illegal, immoral, or downright silly that thing may be). […]
SFL Tweets
@MaranathaEDU Somebody in the camp sinned. // The MBBC football team was victorious in today's game with the Israeli National team: 49-6. 3 days ago
from their website:
Example message: “Good evening, this short message is to tell you that we care about you. If you would like more information, press 1. If you want to leave a message, press 2. If you would like us to take your name off the list, press 9.â€
Example responses:
#1 – slam buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
#2 – “Yeah, right! Visa cares about me, too, every time they interrupt my dinner with a lamebrain automated call!” slam buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
#3 – “Sure, I’d like to leave a message! ” (presses 2) “+-%^%$^@%%@$” slam buzzzzzzz (hopefully the automated system atomatically deletes profanity)
#4 – (presses 9, presses 9, presses 9…)
#5 – Dials number of Christian coworker. “Hey, Bob, about going to church with you Sunday…I think I’ll pass.” click buzzzzzzzz
If you are making unsolicited calls you are *by definition* not following *any* phone etiquette! My hatred of telemarketers (and yes, this is telemarketing!) is surpassed *only* by my hatred of door-to-door solicitors (and yes, knocking on doors for your church counts here).
Fundy churches could pay for it with individual church members signing up to pay hour per hour, and they could count it as soul winning on their merit score sheets!
“Reap in Joy is totally different from telemarketing and should not be thought of as telemarketing.”
Um, really? How???
It’s the same logic that says we can knock on doors where there are No Soliciting signs because “we’re not selling anything.”
I’ve got a few thoughts I’d like to leave on that VM box! #9, #9, #9, #9, #9!!!!!
The old Paths song used to say,
“Jesus freaks out in the street
Handing tickets out for God”
Technology has made the obnoxious sandwichboard, sign carrying Westboro wanna be obsolete.
Now you can Market god just like a spiritual credit card..
For $3.99 per minute you can have JOY help you generate a whole new list of customers for “Personal” followup.
Oh we see your area code has only 24 phone calls allotted. For an additional sum of $500 dollars we can make 6000 calls available to you if you act now. If you call in the next ten minutes we will inclued a gross of the Lord’s Prayer Secret Crosses. All you pay is separate shipping and handling…..” yadda yadda yadda….
When I was ordained to the ministry back in 1996, my pastor wanted to give me a special gift as “I tried to win the world for Jesus” (IFB missions). A slightly used and abused auto-dialer with a self-recorded message! I’m glad he forgot all about it when I moved to my “mission field”. A really great ice-breaker for ministry. Let’s see how many people you can p-o in just one week.
YES! Pairing (some of) the most obnoxious people with THE most annoying technology! My day is now complete, and whole, and lovely. The worst thing about autodialers with multiple lines, is that each line often carries its own, separate phone number, making blocking their calls to your cell nearly impossible. Putting your cell on the do not call list is often a futile effort as well.
@Don- please specify children’s or adult size on that fabulous Lord’s Prayer cross necklace. And speaking of sandwich board people, does anyone know whatever happened to the Shriner guy who used to sit out in front of BJU? He added a unique charm to the front gate.
He’s got to be deceased by now. Pity the man. He was the victim of wacko psycho-surgery in the early 1950s. He suffered a “nervous breakdown,” and was talked into (or committed into) a frontal lobotomy back when they were supposed to be the cure for mental illness. Needless to say, it destroyed his life.
@Beth ummm, we only supply the crosses you will have to provide your own chain..
@Bass- the last time I was in the area, I noticed he was gone. Didn’t know if maybe he had moved elsewhere or was even still alive. Yours is the most real information I’ve heard about him. Every time I asked anyone on campus about him, they acted as though I was asking about some deep, dark campus secret.
I love the sidebar, “because reap in joy ministry is a by faith ministry, your support is vital. Without it we will not be able to reach the lost for Christ.” um, yeah. Okey dokey, then.
Nothing says you care like an automated phone call and a scripted sales pitch!
Eat your heart out Halmark…
I want a soda pop and my dinner out. Guess I’ll spend the $21.50 that could have gone to “Reap In Joy Ministry”. End of the fundy guilt trip and manipulation. Now for a good night’s sleep.
Hey Stephen E,
Did you notice the designer of the website? A little MCA connection there, huh?
@beth – The story goes that “the shriner” had been part of the set design crew, but I never got that straight. My impression from whoever told me (25 years ago), was that he was not actually a regular BJU staff member but more of a person they hired for specific work. (Remember, this would have been back in the heydey of BJU Films). I could be wrong — but as far as I was told, he’d had some actual connection to the school, but not an exceptionally strong one. After the failed surgery (or surgeries), his parents cared for him, and then other family members did.
Again, I feel bad for him. He grew up in an authoritarian society that subjected him to a cruel surgical procedure, and when it destroyed him, he was simply turned loose. I’m glad he had a family that helped him, and I’m glad that he lived in a peaceful community that, overall, didn’t harm him. BJU would never have allowed anybody from the campus to harass him, and I’m glad of that. I worked on Security during my time at BJU, back when girls worked in the front gatehouse (and maybe they do again—I don’t know), and I did see some faculty members greet him and try to be kind to him.
@Richard Sullivan- there was a church that my dad made me attend for a short time that had one of those and so everyone in the little city got a phone call at Christmas Eve and New Years Eve from that church with a message from the pastor, they also played digital church bells very early every Sunday morning.
Fundies….what will they think of next?!!!
“It’s the same logic that says we can knock on doors where there are No Soliciting signs because “we’re not selling anything.—
LOL, yeah, we have a sign at our house that they ignore and they give that exact response. Our response, is yes, you’re selling God. They don’t really appreciate that, but oh well.